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Discussion Starter #1
Hey guys! Do you ever say your thoughts/opinions to people?

If you do, do you find that they react to you with a lot of criticism?
 

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Oh yes. Contrary to what we might seem like at first, we are generally very opinionated.

I tend to keep thoughts to myself if I feel like they won't be received well, unless I have a moral problem with something, in which case I'll get on a soap box and shout from the rooftops. I won't stand for injustice or moral corruption, and if I can do something to change something, I will in a heartbeat. I'll take all the criticism in the world if I'm doing what I believe is the right thing.

If I feel like my thoughts will be well received, then I'm happy to share them.
 

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I don't bother most of the time because I'm lazy af but Of course when I do they react with criticism. That's expected. That's when you share your thought process (aka basically how you got to "point A" from "point B") and they will either agree or disagree for whatever reason. Sometimes it's because there is a flaw in your thought process and others it's because they "feel" like your opinion is wrong. To be honest most times it's likely to be "feels before reals" LMAO
 

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Discussion Starter #5
I don't bother most of the time because I'm lazy af but Of course when I do they react with criticism. That's expected. That's when you share your thought process (aka basically how you got to "point A" from "point B") and they will either agree or disagree for whatever reason. Sometimes it's because there is a flaw in your thought process and others it's because they "feel" like your opinion is wrong. To be honest most times it's likely to be "feels before reals" LMAO
Oh yeah, feels before reals. That's really what it is, haha.

Point A to point B, sometimes it just goes too deep or is too much information and though I actually could more or less express it if I tried, I know people aren't likely to "get" it anyway so I don't bother.

But then it bothers me that people assume my opinions have no validity, so I tend towards not sharing them. Then people assume what my opinions are. Argh lol.

I also a lot of times question the value of sharing them with anyone who I don't consider to be very close where there's a precedent for them understanding where I'm coming from. Otherwise it's like, will my opinion make any difference to anyone? Or will it just be a distraction or a source of misunderstandings?
 

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Oh yes. Contrary to what we might seem like at first, we are generally very opinionated.

I tend to keep thoughts to myself if I feel like they won't be received well, unless I have a moral problem with something, in which case I'll get on a soap box and shout from the rooftops. I won't stand for injustice or moral corruption, and if I can do something to change something, I will in a heartbeat. I'll take all the criticism in the world if I'm doing what I believe is the right thing.

If I feel like my thoughts will be well received, then I'm happy to share them.
This. I am exactly the same way. I think we SEEM sometimes like we don't have opinions, because:

1 - being around people, observing and learning is an excellent way of .. learning. Taking it all in. So we fit in because we want others to be comfortable around us, because we want to learn their true selves, because we truly want to learn about the humanity as a concept. What makes humans tick. What is important to people. etc.

2 - we are reserved when we feel our thoughts won't be well received, as @Westy365 pointed out. We would just retreat to that space in our souls/heads (Ni/Ti) where we formulate even more precise philosophies of humanity.

Someone once called ENFJs "intellectuals of humanity" and I absolutely see that. We like humans, we like to get to know them, we want to be around them etc. But our ultimate goal is to understand the underlying principles that govern humans, and govern ourselves, and facilitate their full development where we see the positive force at play in their lives. Establishing a strong value skeleton/code within ourselves is a result of the same process. With all our human-blending, we need it to know where we stand.

So frequently people that get to know us better react with shock to how opinionated we can get (right, @Dennitsa ? ) - or they get surprised with how outspoken we can be if a value we hold dear is violated. I quite enjoy the surprise effect there, I must say :D Makes all this Ni/Ti pondering into a kick-ass secret weapon :)
 

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It depends on the situation. Most of the time I like to keep the harmony and will do my best to ensure others are at ease.

However all of my friends know if they ask for my advice they will get the honest brutal answer. Every time I preface my answer with, "Are you sure you want my honest opinion?" I also cannot stand injustice - I'm like a dog with a bone and I won't back down. That's when I get very opinionated.

I either have people's respect when I do this or I can just see it in their face ..... "Here she goes again..." :rolleyes:
 

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I would have to say that I share my opinions with people if I feel that my opinion will better them in some way. If I feel that my opinion will not be respected by a person then I don't feel the need to waste my time explaining my opinion. This especially applies to those that won't genuinely try to give my opinion a chance. So, the person must be genuinely open minded to other perspectives in order to receive my opinion. If I know someone won't listen or genuinely try to stay open-minded, I won't see the point in explaining my thoughts with them.

This means.. I mainly keep my opinions on the inside, as to avoid conflict with others. Something else worth mentioning is the fact that my opinions change quite frequently and I am always willing to listen to someone else's opinion.
 
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