[tempestabrilliante]

Hi,

I am currently having problems confessing my love to an INFJ... We've been chatting each other for 3 months in facebook, got her out last february 14 and after that. I am still afraid of confessing, might got rejected. What should i do? How do I court them? Help? :crying:

 

[Alysaria]

So... This Valentine's date... Did you go "Hey let's go out as friends"? Because that seems like a big clue that she's interested if not.

 

[ash.nymous]

Hi,

I am currently having problems confessing my love to an INFJ... We've been chatting each other for 3 months in facebook, got her out last february 14 and after that. I am still afraid of confessing, might got rejected. What should i do? How do I court them? Help? :crying:

I'm an INTJ so feel free to not to take this advice from the emotionless however - If you like her tell her isn't it better then wondering? otherwise you'll spend another three months in anticipation that could have been spent enjoying her or finding someone else.

 

[InTheFridge]

I'm an INTJ so feel free to not to take this advice from the emotionless however - If you like her tell her isn't it better then wondering? otherwise you'll spend another three months in anticipation that could have been spent enjoying her or finding someone else.

As an INFJ with at least 748 emotions, I can confirm what @ash.nymous is saying.

 

[tempestabrilliante]

So... This Valentine's date... Did you go "Hey let's go out as friends"? Because that seems like a big clue that she's interested if not.

i don't know if it is the same with "yayy! i got a date with you."

 

[tempestabrilliante]

I'm an INTJ so feel free to not to take this advice from the emotionless however - If you like her tell her isn't it better then wondering? otherwise you'll spend another three months in anticipation that could have been spent enjoying her or finding someone else.

yeah. that what was i am telling to myself... but it's really hard for me to look for another girl that is close to perfect in my eyes..

 

[Alysaria]

i don't know if it is the same with "yayy! i got a date with you."

What I'm saying is, there is a better than average chance she's interested if you didn't specifically preface the date with "just as friends" or if you went just the two of you and not as a group. Valentine's is kind of a romantic holiday for ambiguous hang out dates.

 

[ash.nymous]

yeah. that what was i am telling to myself... but it's really hard for me to look for another girl that is close to perfect in my eyes..

Lol, no ones perfect bro but I still recommending saying something everyone's afraid of rejection but if you don't act someone else might or you'll be left wondering what could have been.

 

[tempestabrilliante]

What I'm saying is, there is a better than average chance she's interested if you didn't specifically preface the date with "just as friends" or if you went just the two of you and not as a group. Valentine's is kind of a romantic holiday for ambiguous hang out dates.

I don't know. She said that she doesn't care about Valentines. Since she's an introvert, she doesn't wants to go with crowded people but i managed to take her out. But nowadays, she doesn't have the same enthusiasm in our chat like we had before the date. That is maybe the reason why i am in panic and confused to confess...

 

[Alysaria]

It doesn't matter what *she* thinks about Valentine's. The ambiguity of going out someone on that day is not something most females would risk with something they didn't really like - unless it was explicitly stated as friends.

Look, the longer you wait and the more you worry about it, the more stressed out you're going to get. Is this right now better to you than knowing, even if knowing means no?

 

[Tridentus]

Hi,

I am currently having problems confessing my love to an INFJ... We've been chatting each other for 3 months in facebook, got her out last february 14 and after that. I am still afraid of confessing, might got rejected. What should i do? How do I court them? Help? :crying:

I remember the first time I ever asked someone out, like properly asked them out, not just got together with them over time in the same social group. The main motivation that gave me the boost I needed was the deep and cutting regret I had for not asking a preceding girl out. The preceding girl was someone I was flirting with for a YEAR. It was a long long time ago now, but in hindsight she was as smitten with me as I was with her, but for reasons that seem incredible now I opted out.

Nowadays, I would never let it get that far- I'd always ask them out earlier. Why?- because I have the crushing memory of the regret I had for not asking that girl out. As it happens, the ones I've gone out with since have been wrong for me, and the cutting irony is that I occasionally find myself remembering her as the one who didn't have the complications that the others brought with them. I learnt a huge lesson that day that has motivated me to change my attitude entirely.

The question I have for you however is this- would you rather learn the same lesson, or would you rather act as if you already knew it? Trust me, I definitely wish I did.

 

[Winegums]

I'm an INTJ so feel free to not to take this advice from the emotionless however - If you like her tell her isn't it better then wondering? otherwise you'll spend another three months in anticipation that could have been spent enjoying her or finding someone else.

I agree with this too, you've already been on a Valentines date and been talking for 3 months, ask the girl! Don't be afraid of the answer because you can't do anything about it, she either likes you or she doesn't.

Ask the question directly and don't let her dance around the answer.

 

[tempestabrilliante]

It doesn't matter what *she* thinks about Valentine's. The ambiguity of going out someone on that day is not something most females would risk with something they didn't really like - unless it was explicitly stated as friends.

Look, the longer you wait and the more you worry about it, the more stressed out you're going to get. Is this right now better to you than knowing, even if knowing means no?

Yeah I better do it... The thing is, our chat these days is kinda awkward and she doesn't have any enthusiasm like before... I knew I messed up because of what I say contradicts of what I do... Ahhh, I'm getting paranoid....

"I like you. I came here to get rejected properly. To end this, so I can move forward. To make me convinced of this broken heart, I want to get rejected properly."

 

[tempestabrilliante]

I remember the first time I ever asked someone out, like properly asked them out, not just got together with them over time in the same social group. The main motivation that gave me the boost I needed was the deep and cutting regret I had for not asking a preceding girl out. The preceding girl was someone I was flirting with for a YEAR. It was a long long time ago now, but in hindsight she was as smitten with me as I was with her, but for reasons that seem incredible now I opted out.

Nowadays, I would never let it get that far- I'd always ask them out earlier. Why?- because I have the crushing memory of the regret I had for not asking that girl out. As it happens, the ones I've gone out with since have been wrong for me, and the cutting irony is that I occasionally find myself remembering her as the one who didn't have the complications that the others brought with them. I learnt a huge lesson that day that has motivated me to change my attitude entirely.

The question I have for you however is this- would you rather learn the same lesson, or would you rather act as if you already knew it? Trust me, I definitely wish I did.

Thanks man. This inspired me and manned me up. Will now plan how to execute it.

 

[tempestabrilliante]

Hello again guys...

I think t'was too late to confess... as i see from our chat, she do not have any enthusiasm at all... she only replies back with one word and it always takes a whole day. i messed up.

 

[Sygma]

Messed up with what ? if you just asked nothing got messed up bro

 

[lightninglu10]

I remember the first time I ever asked someone out, like properly asked them out, not just got together with them over time in the same social group. The main motivation that gave me the boost I needed was the deep and cutting regret I had for not asking a preceding girl out. The preceding girl was someone I was flirting with for a YEAR. It was a long long time ago now, but in hindsight she was as smitten with me as I was with her, but for reasons that seem incredible now I opted out.

Nowadays, I would never let it get that far- I'd always ask them out earlier. Why?- because I have the crushing memory of the regret I had for not asking that girl out. As it happens, the ones I've gone out with since have been wrong for me, and the cutting irony is that I occasionally find myself remembering her as the one who didn't have the complications that the others brought with them. I learnt a huge lesson that day that has motivated me to change my attitude entirely.

The question I have for you however is this- would you rather learn the same lesson, or would you rather act as if you already knew it? Trust me, I definitely wish I did.

Are you me. Same exact story, I felt like I was reading something I wrote .

 

[Queen of Mars]

Honestly, she probably can already tell.

 

[Sygma]

Well that's the weird thing, if she can tell then why would she put him on the side ? hah. Humans.

"I really like you but like a friend with boobs yaknow"