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I was looking for threads I could respond to about this curious connection, but the ones I can find were last update in like 2011 so I fear replying to those won't do much good :bored:
Wondering if anybody else wants to talk about this as much as I do / is curious? :th_love:

I have one very interesting ISTP I am getting to know and it is proving to be one supremely calming, grounding, and exciting experience... so far.
 

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I have an INFP bestie, and an ESFP friend, so I'll be glad to talk, if it helps.

With my INFP friend, I often feel gentled and subdued, trusting in his thoughts and his certainty- I put down my own guardedness and leave my cynicism at the door. He is a person that mystifies me, and whilst I've long accepted that I may never understand him like I understand others, I'm surprised sometimes that despite the gap in our perspectives, he still values the things I say and what I can help him with. Its comfortable hanging out with him, he dampens the white noise in the background and helps me focus.

With my ESFP friend on the other hand, I end up going into cynicism overdrive. He essentially ups my energy and provokes me into action through his casual awe towards me. He is highly amused at the things I say, and takes comfort in the blasé attitude that I take towards everything that he throws at me. Marvelling at my caustic tolerance towards things that have long pissed off everyone else. Its hard to describe our dynamic properly, but its kind of a cat owner (ESFP) surprised that their semi-feral feline (ISTP) somehow is still around enduring pettings and domesticity despite appearing violently allergic to love.

In my relationship with the INFP, he takes the lead and I willingly hang back. In my relationship with the ESFP, I let him blunder around but I'm there to have his back when he needs me.
 

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I have one very interesting ISTP I am getting to know and it is proving to be one supremely calming, grounding, and exciting experience... so far.
I posted a thread about my relationship on the ISTP forum this year when I was struggling to understand my ISTP boyfriend. May be worth a look if you want some idea of the struggles that may lay ahead! I love him very much though. Calming, grounding and exciting are good words.

ENFP's tend to be very quirky individuals...I've never been with someone who is so happy for me to be myself, major quirks and all. He never tries to change me. He suggests things that may make our lives easier, but nothing personality altering! I think ENFP's celebrate the things that make people individual so he probably feels pretty free to be himself for the first time too. It's a very honest relationship, at times painfully so, but I value knowing where I stand and being able to express myself fully. His rationality helps me stop myself in the throws of getting overly dramatic; often one of us will make a joke and nothing seems that bad if you can laugh about it. I find his ability to fix anything nothing short of a superpower..very useful as I can barely change a lightbulb. We are very affectionate, more likely to express emotion in touch than with words. He is very gentle and easygoing. I'm not easy-going at all...quite intense actually..but he says I make his life fun and colorful. We both like exploring, be it ideas or places. He makes decisions with his head, but for the greater good. I make decisions with my heart and values. Oddly enough although we think about things in completely different ways we often come to the same conclusion.

It's not always easy..I'm high-energy and never leave space to relax until I have my monthly nervous breakdown, which he finds hard as he needs lots of chillout time. He might never be able to give me as much verbal affirmation as I would ideally like. But it's very real. We are very loyal. He is learning to express himself more and I am learning to be more balanced. It's very fun..we are both quite childlike and most of our conversation is laughing our heads off about things or gentle teasing. We are very attracted to each other also :)
 

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I have an INFP bestie, and an ESFP friend, so I'll be glad to talk, if it helps.

With my INFP friend, I often feel gentled and subdued, trusting in his thoughts and his certainty- I put down my own guardedness and leave my cynicism at the door. He is a person that mystifies me, and whilst I've long accepted that I may never understand him like I understand others, I'm surprised sometimes that despite the gap in our perspectives, he still values the things I say and what I can help him with. Its comfortable hanging out with him, he dampens the white noise in the background and helps me focus.
That's interesting. INFP's are the type I feel most similar to...our stack is similar. And I have this dynamic almost with my boyfriend...we don't understand each other fully. We think very differently. But we both appreciate what help and ideas we can offer each other with our different strengths. There is no sense of competition or anger ever which can be very calming.
 

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That's interesting. INFP's are the type I feel most similar to...our stack is similar. And I have this dynamic almost with my boyfriend...we don't understand each other fully. We think very differently. But we both appreciate what help and ideas we can offer each other with our different strengths. There is no sense of competition or anger ever which can be very calming.
I did wonder which description an ENFP would relate to more, but I guess the divide between Ne/Si and Se/Ni is greater than a shuffled function stack haha.

I totally agree with the calming influence and the lack of competition. Although it took me some time to understand that his silences were not always bad, and to learn his subtle sense of humor- so different from the crassness that I prefer. Sometimes I fear that I frighten him when my Se-tendencies come to the fore, like an uncultured swine trying to communicate with a gentle spirit. So I naturally tone my Se down when I sense that it discomforts him.

His subtlety makes me slow down and watch him closer, so that I can understand him better. So many things he says and does flies over my head, so when I'm with him, I make the effort to pay attention and learn. I don't always do so well, but he endures my mistakes with so much kindness that I can't but feel grateful to have the opportunity to be his friend.

His zaniness and initiative also makes my life interesting, left alone I would probably not do half the things that he has cajoled me into doing. Although I do like my comfort zone, I feel safe with him even when he pushes me outside of them. He befuddles me, but at the same time I find him infinitely interesting, as someone who is able to equalize and balance me. Rather than controlling or deferring to me.
 

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I was looking for threads I could respond to about this curious connection, but the ones I can find were last update in like 2011 so I fear replying to those won't do much good :bored:
Wondering if anybody else wants to talk about this as much as I do / is curious? :th_love:

I have one very interesting ISTP I am getting to know and it is proving to be one supremely calming, grounding, and exciting experience... so far.
I'm married to an Istp - we've been together for 10 years . We combine quite well - mainly do to the fact that were completely different from one another so it's easier for us to give each other time to do thing separately - it's like I can still be me , have my own separate hobbies and friends, travel and same with him and at the end of the day we can talk on for hours bc our differences amuses each other more than irritates . Of course there are downfall - mainly when his inferior Fe kicks in and try to make assumption about my Fi - but for the most part he fell for me bc of my introverted feeling and I guess his Ti attracts me bc I find it compelling :) we do disagree now and then and it can get frustrating - but for the most part the relationship is quite mellow


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I'm attracted to all ENFPs I've met so far, men and women alike. Your cognitive stack is completely different from mine, and you see the other half of the world I don't have eyes for. I like that you don't look at what society expects of you. You march to your own unique drummer, and it makes you so interesting to figure out: because you are individuals!
Social norms are important for social stability, but I am often mistrustful of my inferior Fe. In fact, it often pains me, that's where I am very very vulnerable. I am used to living in the world of logic and concrete reality, and often my Ti hurts my feelings, and I do not even know about it. The intensity of you Fi reminds me of my own Fe. In fact, I am attracted to your Fi because you take care of me. I do not even have vocabulary for what I feel most of the times, my feelings are undifferentiated, and I am grateful that you understand me without any words.
 

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I'm attracted to all ENFPs I've met so far, men and women alike. Your cognitive stack is completely different from mine, and you see the other half of the world I don't have eyes for. I like that you don't look at what society expects of you. You march to your own unique drummer, and it makes you so interesting to figure out: because you are individuals!
Social norms are important for social stability, but I am often mistrustful of my inferior Fe. In fact, it often pains me, that's where I am very very vulnerable. I am used to living in the world of logic and concrete reality, and often my Ti hurts my feelings, and I do not even know about it. The intensity of you Fi reminds me of my own Fe. In fact, I am attracted to your Fi because you take care of me. I do not even have vocabulary for what I feel most of the times, my feelings are undifferentiated, and I am grateful that you understand me without any words.
That's nice. My bf says that about not even being sure about how he feels sometimes, like it's all tangled up and hazy. I have to read into his actions :) . I would say from the ones I know that's where ISTP's and ENFP's match up...we both march to the beat of our own drum. Free spirits in slightly different ways.
 

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While I'm not attracted to her romantically, I have a buddy who is an ENFP.

She's seriously awesome. She's extremely thoughtful and courteous and very loving. She's also very quirky and very much an extrovert. She does all kinds of nice things for her family - and I see her put in the time (ot hours) to pull off these nice things for them. She almost always has a smile on her face and is very upbeat. I don't know any women who can tell me stories about how they got robbed and *laugh* about it. No, really.
 

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From what I read about other ISTPs' relationship with ENFPs, the common thing among those that get along well is that there is a common ground between both of them.

An understanding that they are very different and that both sides need to compromise (At least by not letting that difference get in the way). And they do have a lot to compromise to come to a peace.

Very different yet similar.

From what I read anyway.
 

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I have a load of ENFP friends, both on here and irl. They're pretty entertaining.
 
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