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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Have you been viewed to be entirely too masculine in your approach to life or to not being the traditional woman. I mean housewife just isnt me and maybe I am too friendly with my daughter. Do you feel this way too?
 

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Oh I am first:p

Hmm when I was younger I wanned to have traditional house with traditional family-but now..
I can't imagine my life as a houswife-I wanned to be more independence and less sensitive and I even can't thinking that I will be with one men (husband) to the end-Maybe I even prefer to live alone with kids:p and be in free relationship

-And yees-I don't have kid but with my niece & I are like friends-I don't like hierarchy in family:p.
 

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Not an ENFP but I sometimes just feel like my Ni wants to embrace both male and female experience and just believe that there are more options present out there rather than being restricted to one experience, one kind of role in life. As a result my behavior can oscillate. I really see that there are many more similarities between men and women rather than differences.
 

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Great question for a thread!

I was a tree climbing tomboy when I was young but spent recess -- and just about every other minute -- trying to get boys to kiss me. I love the differences in our genders!

I was a housewife too, but that role doesn't fit any more. It was fullfilling in it's time, but my kids are practically adults. Some women see me as brave or unconventional because I trek off to camp alone, and I hope to be traveling alone to see more of the US and the world. That could be considered a masculine view, but I see it as personality related, more than gender.

Now, I need to be free to come and go as I please and to pursue my own interests. And that's a wide variety of experiences.
 

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I'm better friends with my oldest son. We have always been able to talk about real issues and joke in a mildly outrageous way. No one would fault me on that. If they did, they must have some issues.

I love being a woman. I love wearing dresses and I love that men are so different from me. I love having this complex and unpredictable personality. We don't have to fit any preconceived roles or stereotypes today.

I'm less fearful today and less concerned with pleasing others, although I have a deep respect for people, regardless of whether they agree with me or not. I encourage women on this forum to go your own way, to find your passion and authenticity.

But care for others too. I think we're here to learn something and to give of our time, money and other resources. Not be entirely focused on ourselves. It's finding the balance that makes it work.
 

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I would consider myself a bit of a tomboy...I don't have a boyfriend simply because I love my freedom too much...i.e. I want to do what I want, when I want and how I want. I can't see myself having kids (I don't want to tie myself down for 18 years...i.e. I love my freedom) I'm not fond of high heels...I prefer trainers, sneakers.
I love my big t-shirts, I normally shop in the guys section for my t-shirts (I love baggy clothes in general).
I refuse to wear any make up.
I've had people try and change me to become more girly (so not happening!).
BUT: I do have a softer side...it's just not that obvious...I cater more to my 'harder' side.
I feel people are still quite stereotyped when it comes to women. They're 'expected' (unwritten rule) to wear high heels...I hardly ever see any woman (or even teenager girls for that matter) wear trainers or sneakers (except when they go to gym).
People's ideals may have changed with how they view woman being housewives but people still expect woman to act like woman...
There's my speech about being a woman in today's age! :happy::tongue::crazy:
 
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Closet extrovert, I love your signature!

And I should add, I don't wear heels either. My feet won't allow it! But I love long dresses! :')
 
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First of all... what's wrong with being "too" friendly with your daughter? ;D I think it's lovely if a parent has an awesome relationship with their children!

During my beginning years of elementary school, I was a tomboy in many ways... but as I've grown older, I've learned to embrace my more feminine side. ...What's left of it, I mean. I am both girly and manly! :tongue:

To be honest, I really have no idea whether I lean more on the girl side or the guy side, especially since what can be considered "womanly" and "manly" is all subjective. I plan to go to college so I can later get a good paying job, so I guess in that sense, I won't be some housewife that stays at home instead of working a job... but I also wouldn't object to staying home to take care of the children, once I do have children. I don't know. It all depends on what lies ahead for me in my future... I don't care whether it's girly or manly, I just want to be able to do what I want to do. ^^
 

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Discussion Starter · #10 ·
I was a tree climbing tomboy when I was young but spent recess -- and just about every other minute -- trying to get boys to kiss me. I love the differences in our genders!

I was a housewife too, but that role doesn't fit any more. It was fullfilling in it's time, but my kids are practically adults. Some women see me as brave or unconventional because I trek off to camp alone, and I hope to be traveling alone to see more of the US and the world. That could be considered a masculine view, but I see it as personality related, more than gender.

Now, I need to be free to come and go as I please and to pursue my own interests. And that's a wide variety of experiences.
I was always a tomboy as well but I love being a woman also. I am so unconventional that it is quite hard for men to deal with. I have always had a predominately male entourage and become friends easier with guys.
 

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Yes. I don't particularly strike people as a girly girl.

Imagine how that clashes with my traditionalist AND paranoid ISFJ mother. Apparently, I'm supposed to cook and clean because I'm a girl, but it's freaking hypocrisy when my parents don't let me anywhere NEAR the stove.

Not to mention that it's so hard to explain to someone why I don't want to get married or have kids... And my mindset has been that way for the past six years because I like my freedom, thanks.
 

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Discussion Starter · #12 ·
Yes. I don't particularly strike people as a girly girl.

Imagine how that clashes with my traditionalist AND paranoid ISFJ mother. Apparently, I'm supposed to cook and clean because I'm a girl, but it's freaking hypocrisy when my parents don't let me anywhere NEAR the stove.

Not to mention that it's so hard to explain to someone why I don't want to get married or have kids... And my mindset has been that way for the past six years because I like my freedom, thanks.
I think all parents have a hard time accepting this. I have been in a battle with my Dad all of my life because I have never been a girly girl. He used to tell me I was never going to find a husband because I was too mannish, I didnt know what this meant until I was older but it hit me why he said this when I started dating.

Guys love having me for a friend and will never betray our friendship but as soon as it becomes more than that they run....

I cook (I love to by the way) and I will be the provider but I am a little bossy especially in my own house....bossy to the guy and friendly to my daughter how backwards is that lol:laughing:
 

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I think all parents have a hard time accepting this. I have been in a battle with my Dad all of my life because I have never been a girly girl. He used to tell me I was never going to find a husband because I was too mannish, I didnt know what this meant until I was older but it hit me why he said this when I started dating.

Guys love having me for a friend and will never betray our friendship but as soon as it becomes more than that they run....

I cook (I love to by the way) and I will be the provider but I am a little bossy especially in my own house....bossy to the guy and friendly to my daughter how backwards is that lol:laughing:

I can bake, but I can't cook.

Besides, someone told me that you're supposed to make your guy THINK he's in control, even when he's not. :laughing:

I just think it would be heavier on my parents if I were to tell them that I didn't want kids, after my brother had come out of the closet. :bored: No biological grand-kids?
 

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Discussion Starter · #14 ·
I can bake, but I can't cook.

Besides, someone told me that you're supposed to make your guy THINK he's in control, even when he's not. :laughing:

I just think it would be heavier on my parents if I were to tell them that I didn't want kids, after my brother had come out of the closet. :bored: No biological grand-kids?
I can bake and cook but I was so intrigued by it when my mother was in th kitchen that I just took it up as a hobby myself.

Now as far as making a guy THINK he is in control......eh.....no can do....well let me take that back....eh...never mind.

LOL! Im a non conformist, I will let him think he is in control of certain things and situations(probably ones I dont want to bother with) but the moment he attempts to verbalize his control then any little control he may have had just by me being nice is gone out the window. At that point he can count on my mouth moving a mile a minute....lol!
 

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Closet extrovert, I love your signature!

And I should add, I don't wear heels either. My feet won't allow it! But I love long dresses! :')
Yeah, I reckon wearing very high heels are bad for your feet! :tongue:

I've got dresses in my cupboard, but I've only wore all of them a number of times that I can count on my one hand. I've got skirts, but not girly ones, more of the surfer type skirts, and I only wear those when I'm in the mood to wear them.

I like my signature because it inspires me... :happy:
 

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Yeah, I grew up somewhat of a tomboy definitely and never struck anyone as a girly girl. I guess that's me. I'm a rough-and-tumble kind of girl and don't care much for the superficial aspects of femininity. To the girls who do love the dressy part of being a girl, go ahead, that's great! But I wouldn't go as far as saying I lean more towards guys than girls. I grew up with the boys and it's easy for me to befriend guys, but there's still something distinctly female about me.. I guess it's because I am female? ENFP is an overall feminine personality after all, but I certainly don't fit into any female stereotypes.

I generally like who I am, and whether it goes one way or another, it's me. That's all that matters. I don't attribute my unique qualities to men anyway. They're strictly my own! :cool:
 

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I was always a tomboy as well but I love being a woman also. I am so unconventional that it is quite hard for men to deal with. I have always had a predominately male entourage and become friends easier with guys.
For me too. Being unconventional seems new to me, as I've become more and more so, but it's who I was orginally. I was always the leader when I was a young girl. "Let's go into the woods!" "Lets see who can kiss him first!" "Let's walk on the train tracks into town!" Always trying to get my friends to try stuff. But I was also into reading and writing and being a good girl ansd did well in school. which were very conventional pursuits.

My family encourages this the more they see it, but if they knew how many times a man has told me I have an inner freak, they'd probably not be very happy. I think the guys who say it are being just really clever. (cough) :')
 
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I'm not masculine or a tomboy in the traditional way-- I'm not athletic, I dress very femininely, and am a bit of a "girly-girl" in some ways, but I definitely will not be a very good housewife when the time comes...I hardly know how to cook anything, I HATE cleaning and household chores more than life itself and see them as a complete waste of time. In fact, I kind of feel bad for my future husband for this reason... ha, but I guess I'll just have to learn to like it.

I'm also pretty low-maintanance and am really bad about remembering to do things like paint my fingernails, wax/tweeze my eyebrows, etc... those kinds of things that aren't NECESSARY for good hygiene but are nice for girls to do. Again, I just kind of see it as a waste of time.
 

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It seems to me like ENFP girls are the girliest of the girly, but also participate in "man activities".
Surely you've met the exception to the rule (i.e. an ENFP girl that isn't the girly sort?)
 
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