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Discussion Starter · #1 · (Edited)
One year ago I took the official MBTI and scored ENFP, but the P was very close to the border.

When I was ten, I also took the official MBTI, and--to the best of my memory--I scored ENFJ.

In theory I relate much more to perceiving than judging. I don't like closing off my options, and I have a lot of trouble committing to career and relationships...very stereotypical ENFP problems. I'm also messy, inconsistent, and overextended.

But tonight, I took this test: and scored:

Fe 21/ Fi 15

(I also scored a 20 for Ti...could this be simple confusion for Fi?)

Ne 14/ Ni 10

In some ways, Ni seems like a better fit for me. I know two other ENFP's well, females with my Enneagram type and everything, and their minds just jump from topic to topic to topic...they've both been diagnosed with ADHD. I like to hunker down and focus on one thing, and when I come to conclusions, it usually seems to be "out of nowhere"...I can't trace how all of the ideas led into each other, I just keep skimming through readings and information until something "clicks."

In defense of Ne, I do understand how developed ideas fit different fields of study relate, how different personality types relate, etc. I'm interested in all of the different components of society, how they function together to make a coherent whole. I also love symbolism and metaphor.

I've always thought I wasn't Fe because I hate mindless conformity to cultural/social norms...but that's the thing, I'm hyperaware of conformity to norms, I just consciously stop myself because I'm living in a country driven by institutions with which I very much disagree...and, in a sense, the norm of my "in-group" (friends and family) is nonconformity.

I never found myself as creative as ENFP is supposed to be (I always just figured that meant I was out of touch with Fi and leaning on Te too heavily.) I've naturally been very successful at performing instrumental music though...replicating and responding to other people's creations. I also do well at English classes--understanding other perspectives and points of view. Producing my own works of creative writing doesn't come as naturally.

Here are some more facts about me, which I'll write while trying not to think about specific functions and/or types:
- Many people say I'm very empathetic, or "the nicest person ever." <- At least four different people refer to me with that specific phrase.
- I don't have trouble making friends, but I do have trouble feeling truly close and connected with people.
- I love school, theoretical ideas, and intellectual conversations. I get good grades without a whole lot of effort.
- I'm really bad at sports.
- I'm fairly bad at talking about myself with no questions to direct me...
- When I start to get serious with someone in a relationship, I just start crying constantly, for no real's like all of my emotions mix together and come out in that one form. There are a lot of other factors outside the relationship contributing to this too though. Part of the problem is that I only feel truly comfortable opening up to significant others-- I'll feel the need to censor even around close friends. I make a huge effort to stay friends with ex's, probably in large part because of's such a big deal for me to gain a confidante, I can't stand to lose one without a fight!
- I like logic puzzles, but there are only so many different angles I can look at something from until I give up and have no idea where else to go or what else to do with the problem.
- I come off really upbeat and happy and loving everyone, but I don't always feel that way at all.
- I was diagnosed with depression in high school. I had previously been so high strung and caring about everything that eventually I just snapped and couldn't care about anything, couldn't see the "point" of doing anything, felt that life was just so meaningless. I didn't know how to communicate this to anyone, so I kinda hermit-ed myself away from everyone and felt really alienated and lonely.
- In high school I also had food/body image issues. I started dieting freshman year, and I got really anal about it...counting every calorie and protein gram. Food became such a big deal that eventually it was the only thing I could look forward to, the only thing I got any pleasure out of. I would wake up and spend a half hour eating breakfast, anything I could possibly find, because the longer I ate, the longer I could put off dealing with the school day-- and that prospect was incredibly overwhelming for me.
- I'm a junior in college now, and pretty solidly past most of these problems...the tendencies are still there, but I've got them under control, thanks in part to personality theory.
- Sometimes it seems I can't trust myself to navigate successfully through the world without analyzing every impulse.
- I'm an Enneagram 9w1 so/sp.

Any insight is greatly appreciated!

162 Posts
Discussion Starter · #4 ·
I think you sound ENFJ! I know an INFJ who is against most cultural norms but who creates her own norms that she wants everyone to adhere to. Is that sort of what you're getting at here?
I want everyone to be basically respectful of each other...but so does everyone? Otherwise freedom to develop one's own sense of "normal" is really important to me--but I think that's how every F-user works, that's kinda what defines F.

I think I resent some norms because I think that they stop people from connecting as intimately and easily as they could, the norms that make me feel like I can't talk about my emotions without jumping through a bunch of hoops first.

Maybe this is a major distinction! The other two ENFP's I know are more open about themselves more quickly and easily than I am. For me, it's not that I don't want other people to know about my life and's just that I don't know how to tell them without putting them in an uncomfortable position, or I simply don't know how to express myself in a way they would understand.

...that sounds very Fe.

I also resent norms because they're set by the people in power in our culture/society...which means the people with the most money essentially dictate my actions...when I mindlessly cater to norms, I compulsively promote the very forces which oppress me.

Also (letters and functions aside): Are you more INFP or INFJ? Are you more ISTP or ISTJ? And are you more ESTP or ESTJ?
Also: Would people see you as a more intuitive-thinker or feeling-sensor since those are the extraverted dominant-tertiary functions for ENFP/ENFJ.
Gut reactions--INFP, ISTP, ESTP....alll perceivers haha. But, with the last two, all users of Ti.

Feeling-sensor. I think my "feeling"ness is very obvious to people, and I kinda downplay my intelligence sometimes.

Looks like a pretty clear ENFJ! I must have tested ENFP because I overuse Ti and I'm out of touch with Ni...leading me to constantly seek out lots of new ideas and fields of study, never feeling satisfied (what I mistaked for Ne.) Being an Enneagram 9 also makes me appear more "P," and I related well to the other two ENFP's because they are also 9's.


162 Posts
Discussion Starter · #6 ·
While I am unsure as to whether or not what I am about to post will be of much help towards you, I've just discolsed yet another difference among ENFPs and ENFJs that I believe you may find to be interesting :happy:.

While each personality type is known for their invariable optmism and sensational ability when it comes to being able to both relate to and inspire others, the ENFP tends to be more focused on his own personal goals and future pathways throughout life, which therefore leads to their disorganized and somewhat unreliable nature, whereas the ENFJ tends to center their goals around the people whom encompass them, valuing their personal opinions and emotions concerning themselves much more at times than their own.

ENFPs are generally the type of beings whom long for a specific goal to follow throughout life in addition to finding meaning and purpose within their existence, which therefore results in their appearing to be both rather lacking in commitment when it comes to romantic relationships and sincere motivation, whereas the ENFJs world nonetheless encircles the beings they encounter, their goals and aspirations for life tend to revolve around personal values, and emotions, with their thinking of just how their desires will benefit both themself and those that surround them.

While I've, strangely enough, admittedly had confusion telling the types apart, to conclude this, I believe that the main difference that contrasts each personality typing is that a person of the ENFP personality tends to be more focused on finding true meaning and being able to obtain what they sincerely long for throughout their life span, whether it is being able to identify that soulmate with whom they will be able to share that immaculate relationship with (thus leading towards some of them's walking in and out of various relationships at given times in that quest of finding that perfect significant other for them) or merely being able to attain a job or profession in which they feel they can both express their natural creativity and helps those surrounding them without feeling any sudden boredom, whereas one whom is an ENFJ merely longs for a life-long relationship with another whom will truly be able to empathize and support them, there true longing in life being to be accepted and appreciated by those encompassing them for who they are and being able to help them in any possible manner they can.

I hope this helped you in some way :)!
That did indeed help me! (man I love INFP's.) Since writing this thread awhile ago, I've reaffirmed my ENFP-ness, and this helped me to solidify it! It seems kind of like ENFP's naturally connect with other people but more than anything they want their own personal direction without too much influence from those connections, while ENFJ's naturally find direction but more than anything they want to connect with other people.
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