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It says In the Bible that Children are Gifts of God, so we should desire Children. I myself love small children. I love them maybe because they're not mine. I feel that Children aren't for me although I'de probably make a great mother. My future involves too much activity for children and I would just be afraid to never apply any attention to my children since I would always be out in the world doing what I love to do. Children are a sign of contemptment and a slowing of your life to take care of something. I'm not ready to slow down.
 

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Kids.

I am one of 6 children currently. I can't stand all the noise and whining of children. I love how innocent they are, and imaginative, as well as niave, and I can deal with them as long as they aren't mine. I can stand them for a certain amount of time before they start to annoy me and I want to go back upstairs to my room and sleep.

If I was to actually have a kid, I don't know what I would do with myself or how I would handle it. I'm able to handle very small, obedient children [1 to 2 years] and 14 and up. Sometimes 7 year olds. I wouldn't want to be pregnant because I'd be all fat and round and I'd feel ugly for 9 months. Plus, there's pain involved. Why would I want to put myself in the worst pain I'll ever feel in my entire life? There's too many things I want to do with my life. Unless God has kids in store for me, I wouldn't want to do it.

So no, no kids.
 

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ENFP's make better Aunts and Uncles.
 

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This is a very interesting post. As an ENFP myself (but obviously not a woman) I want no more then two kids. Even one would be OK. But not three. Although kids love me, I look at them almost as little aliens. I always tell people in real-life that in my dream world your child would pop out at 21 years old and the two of us would head straight to Starbucks for a chat. But alas, this world doesn't work that way.

I'm hoping for a dependable wife of some sort to help me since I'm sure I'd be more my kid's friend then dad...
 

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This is a very interesting post. As an ENFP myself (but obviously not a woman) I want no more then two kids. Even one would be OK. But not three. Although kids love me, I look at them almost as little aliens. I always tell people in real-life that in my dream world your child would pop out at 21 years old and the two of us would head straight to Starbucks for a chat. But alas, this world doesn't work that way.

I'm hoping for a dependable wife of some sort to help me since I'm sure I'd be more my kid's friend then dad...
Have you considered being a foster parent to older children?
Or perhaps adoption would work for you, of older children.
 

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Okay, I know this is going to sound incredibly selfish. But I thought I would share as it might help others.

I was scared to even have one child. I REALLY had to be convinced. I do not regret, it however. She can be the source of my strength on many destitute nights. In many ways, she has kept me alive.

My daughter will be 13 next month. I am fortunate that she has such an incredibly independent spirit. I honestly wouldn't know what to do with a whiney clingy child. I do not think I am the best parent for that.

I am very sure that my daughter feels she has a "sister" at times. Because I am silly. But I also expect a lot out of her. I don't like creating dependency. She is not mine to keep. She is an ambassador to our future. I just have to try to not fuck up too much around her.

Btw, my daughter thinks I am an "Introvert" that "doesn't like people". She tells me that all the time. This is because I really am a private person who doesn't like keeping my door open for just any rugrats or neighbors coming around.

My daughter is incredibly gifted and sometimes it freaks me the hell out to be honest. But she gives me great insight to things and goes very deep. She is definitely a hard-core intuitive. I think I just got lucky with this one. But I think I'd definitely screw up the next one. She also has an incredible amount of confidence and is not jealous when I've had a boyfriend. In fact she encourages it, because it lets her do her own thing. Plus she knows I am very picky. She can also "let go" pretty well and accept change. THANK GOD, I have a daughter not into material things.

Anyway. I know my brain couldn't handle more than one child. I am not good at that. Plus, I am not too keen on "family". The mere thought of "family" gives me hives. I like individuals. I don't share my private space with just anyone.

I also admit to being too vein to let my body expand like that ever again. I am very active. I teach aerobics, I am an actress, I am an endurance athlete. Very vein endeavors.

Counselors say I'm doing great with her (I often doubt my ability). They say her independence is a GOOD sign. They think my independence is a good sign. Now I believe that too. I hate people who induce guilt to make their child not grow up. As much as it will pain me, I want her to feel free to explore the world and achieve her dreams. Her father is not American so I know she will eventually live for awhile in a different country. That is her spirit. She can also be quite the rebel. All I can do is support her growth and prepare myself.

But I really think parenting is NOT my forte. I love my daughter to death, but she's all the child I need. The whole stroller in the park thing and connecting with other parents doesn't make sense with me. I mean I was there for my daughter when she was a baby. I even stayed at home. But why do I need to talk to some other mom in some suburb when all we had in common was changing diapers? Bleh...gave me a sick feeling in my stomach.

So there you go. Do I earn the worse parent award or what?
 

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I would like children...no more than two and preferably twins. A boy and a girl. Yes, I have this planned. I'm scared to parent, but I think I can do a good job. I have the energy needed in abundance and I can focus when necessary. I'd love ENFP children though. Then we could all just be crazy together.
 

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Discussion Starter #11
May I ask what your background is HeartlySerious? I ask because I suspect the answer to my opening question has more to do with cultural norms and values rather than MBTI.

And pinkrasputin, it seems to me that taking responsibility for your child and raising her as far as you have is proof that you are definitely not deserving of the worst parent award.
 

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I'm not a girl. But I like the question, so I had to answer.

I would have to get in the right mind-state to bring a child into the world.
 
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May I ask what your background is HeartlySerious? I ask because I suspect the answer to my opening question has more to do with cultural norms and values rather than MBTI.

And pinkrasputin, it seems to me that taking responsibility for your child and raising her as far as you have is proof that you are definitely not deserving of the worst parent award.
C: I'm an only child, that may influence my desire for "the more the merrier". I like people though :D so it may have something to do with the type. A big family sounds wonderful, and i love kids~
 

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C: I'm an only child, that may influence my desire for "the more the merrier". I like people though :D so it may have something to do with the type. A big family sounds wonderful, and i love kids~
This has got to be the case with my daughter. I had siblings and I feel like I'm am saving my child from the devils by not giving her brothers and sisters. My daughter on the other hand is an only child. She talks about having lots of kids one day. She is an extrovert so until then she acts as if the World is "her sibling". She forms relationships and connections FAST.
 

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This has got to be the case with my daughter. I had siblings and I feel like I'm am saving my child from the devils by not giving her brothers and sisters. My daughter on the other hand is an only child. She talks about having lots of kids one day. She is an extrovert so until then she acts as if the World is "her sibling". She forms relationships and connections FAST.
:D my long lost twin!
I think siblings are such blessing C: Family bonds and all, bestfriends for life. Hahhahaa it's so true, i'm out to be bestfriend with everyone i met, "familied" alot of friends i made too :D a game i like to play.
 

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Discussion Starter #16
Hmm, this is indeed a fascinating new theory. I must confess I had never thought of this, though it seems to be more accurate. As for myself I don't much like people, but I do come from a big family and I am very close to them and as such I want my children to be able to enjoy this as well. pinkrasputin if you don't mind my asking, were you close to your family; do you feel they played a highly constructive role in your life?
 

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Hmm, this is indeed a fascinating new theory. I must confess I had never thought of this, though it seems to be more accurate. As for myself I don't much like people, but I do come from a big family and I am very close to them and as such I want my children to be able to enjoy this as well. pinkrasputin if you don't mind my asking, were you close to your family; do you feel they played a highly constructive role in your life?
I would say that my family played more of a destructive role in my life: lack of privacy, power tripping, and I was the only intuitive. I was also the youngest of 4. The closest sibling was 5 years older. I had lots of time on my own after they all moved out.

I am also a Latina, so as far as what's "culturally norm" for us doesn't apply to me either. I think our biological clocks start ticking at age 14 or something. I should have had a ton of children by now. :laughing:

But now Heartlyserious' response is making me ponder over what I am actually doing to my extroverted child. Maybe I should have another? Maybe I'll adopt? Apparently our shelter dog wasn't enough for her. :tongue:
 

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YES, I REALLY WANT CHILDREN! I always wanted children even when I was a child. I want to experience life inside my belly and parenthood. I know being a parent will be scary especially when the child turn 7 or become independent. And the possibility of passing on my learning disability to my children because I don't want them to have a hard time in school or life in general. But I guess I'll be ok. I have been told I would be a great mother since I spend a great deal of my life around children: daycare assistant and camp counselor. My only fault is discipline, I don't like to discipline children but I do.

But I'm surprise that enfps don't think they would be good parent or don't want to experience parenthood. I really believe children will help us to be more stable. I REALLY BELIEVE ENFPS can be excellent parents.
 
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Discussion Starter #19
It seems that an interesting trend is emerging. I did not check through all of the 'nays' and we clearly do not have a large enough sample size to make any serious statistical analyses, but it would appear that the 'yays' come from ENFPs whose enneagram type is 4. Fascinating. Please ENFPs, keep the responses coming.
 

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I must say I got attracted to this topic out of curiosity for how girls feel about having kids, and wanting to understand it for the future. The answers I saw where... surprising, and I see I don't understand girls half as much as I thought (although that is hardly surprising considering my age...).
You should make a similar thread for boys, my friend.

As I found the subject fascinating I can't help telling you MY views as a boy/man/male...
I want a child, or two (as long as they are about the same age) but not in many years to come. :proud:
 
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