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Do you have problems of being or living alone? Do you have a problem with the idea of solitude? Why?
ENFP's and solitude
[ENFP]
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Anyone seen "The Shining"? 'All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy'
I love to relax and have quiet reflection - ME Time. Problem is though, I get caught up spinning too many gears, eventually I need to get some of that off my mind - and onto someone else's! Solitude is a strong word. I could handle it in short bits but if I were Cast Away like Tom Hanks I'd probably end up more like Jack in The Shining.
I love to relax and have quiet reflection - ME Time. Problem is though, I get caught up spinning too many gears, eventually I need to get some of that off my mind - and onto someone else's! Solitude is a strong word. I could handle it in short bits but if I were Cast Away like Tom Hanks I'd probably end up more like Jack in The Shining.
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I have absolutely zero qualms with being by myself. Don't get me wrong, I love people, and I get really energetic and excited and such, but I need "me" time, too. When there are changes going on in my life, whether minor or major, I come off as a huge introvert. There's just a switch in my brain that can go from "social butterfly" to "anti-social" at a moment's notice, and I'm (usually) absolutely fine with it.
I don't mind solitude at all, as long as I'm still able to get out and hang out with people when I want to. ^^ The idea of it sounds nice, really - if the "default" setting is being alone, and you get to choose when you want to NOT be alone, you can change from being in solitude to socializing at will... and I love both alone time and socializing time!
I like alone time because it gives me time to really think, reflect, and imagine. :3 However, it's true that if I'm in solitude for a veeery long time, I will really start to desire the company of others. But it also happens in reverse - if I'm in the company of others for a veeery long time, I will really start to desire alone time, because it's hard to really quietly reflect when you're in company. ^^;;
I like alone time because it gives me time to really think, reflect, and imagine. :3 However, it's true that if I'm in solitude for a veeery long time, I will really start to desire the company of others. But it also happens in reverse - if I'm in the company of others for a veeery long time, I will really start to desire alone time, because it's hard to really quietly reflect when you're in company. ^^;;
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I...don't really handle alone time that great.
I mean, I can't live without it and I know how important it is, but I would rather my "alone time" be sitting by myself in a crowded coffeehouse or sitting in the park surrounded by strangers. I can go off into my own little world and daydream while still being around people.
If it's just me sitting alone in my lonely apartment, then I can get kind of blue. It's really not big enough for a roommate, but maybe I should think about finding one. :crazy:
I mean, I can't live without it and I know how important it is, but I would rather my "alone time" be sitting by myself in a crowded coffeehouse or sitting in the park surrounded by strangers. I can go off into my own little world and daydream while still being around people.
If it's just me sitting alone in my lonely apartment, then I can get kind of blue. It's really not big enough for a roommate, but maybe I should think about finding one. :crazy:
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I apologize for my vague question. I was in a rush this morning for work but I really was curious about this.
To be more specific, I'm referring to living your life alone. Not stranded on a island but more like living without a partner for the rest of your life. Does this thought scare you? Are you comfortable with it?
To be more specific, I'm referring to living your life alone. Not stranded on a island but more like living without a partner for the rest of your life. Does this thought scare you? Are you comfortable with it?
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No, not at all comfortable. -_-
I wouldn't say it scares me, but I do find such a prospect highly undesirable. It's not like I'm actively searching for a partner (let the chips fall where they may), but guess I have a little romantic in me after all who just wants someone to be there for her when she's feeling blue and to cuddle and tease and give lots and lots of love to.
And more than that, but someone with whom I can experience life; alongside each other, growing and becoming better people. Living together. Sharing life together.
Yes, I do desire that.
The thought of the opposite, well, it just seems so sad. It doesn't have to be sad if things turn out that way, of course (and I feel like I'd make it a happy situation regardless), but it isn't ideal.
I guess I'm a big ol' NF with my idealism and everything. :laughing:
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I've actually thought about this very question quite a bit, and I can't honestly say whether or not that prospect is good or bad for me. I certainly love dating and having a girlfriend, etc. However, I'm not sure if that means I would love marrying someone.
Leaving aside the fact that I'm an atheist living in a fairly Christian area, I'm not sure if I'm willing to pin myself down to one place. I don't mind making a commitment to a person, especially if I enjoy that person enough to consider marrying them, but it's more of the prospect that I may have to limit other areas of my life because I made the decision to marry them. This predicament is made even larger due to the fact that, someday, I do actually want children, but I don't want to be tied down due to marital committment. It's quite a paradox. :|
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I was in an unhappy marriage for a long time (1/2 of the 27 yrs were un happy) and I do NOT want to be alone...those last years made me realize how much I was missing. I am actively looking for someone and will not give up until the day I die.
I don't mind alone time, but I totally agree with ENERGETICELEPHANT when she mentioned being alone in a park full of people... THAT is my idea of being alone.. NOT totally alone... although living with mom and my kids??? I am craving alone right now lol (small house + us = OMG I need quiet).....
I don't mind alone time, but I totally agree with ENERGETICELEPHANT when she mentioned being alone in a park full of people... THAT is my idea of being alone.. NOT totally alone... although living with mom and my kids??? I am craving alone right now lol (small house + us = OMG I need quiet).....
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Yes, because I become extremely bored when I am alone. The only thing that I do when I am alone is masturbate, and it's pretty sad
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Hahaha Nate... I am almost like that too... **maybe we should get together** lol just kidding... you made me laugh there!
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I like being alone, I like quiet, I think the example of being alone in a park full of people is great ... I want people around, I don't want to feel stranded on an island or in the sticks or boarded up in a house by myself...it's a good idea for me to leave the house every day, or to have roommates or a close neighbor, but I don't necessarily always want to talk to them or have them in my face, either. I'm definitely not an extrovert in the sense that I always want to be actively engaged with other people, because I definitely don't...far, far from it. I'm more borderline E/I. My extroversion lies more in the forcefulness and expressiveness of my personality rather than my need to talk to people.
As for going my whole life without a partner, NO WAY. I could totally live in a more isolated part of the world...say, move back to West Virginia...if I was married. But the prospect of being alone with work or academia or just having friends for the rest of my life is a nightmare to me. I definitely want a partner. In that sense, no, I do not like to be alone.
As for going my whole life without a partner, NO WAY. I could totally live in a more isolated part of the world...say, move back to West Virginia...if I was married. But the prospect of being alone with work or academia or just having friends for the rest of my life is a nightmare to me. I definitely want a partner. In that sense, no, I do not like to be alone.
You know what? I think I could probably pull off living the rest of my life sans-partner, but I'd rather not live sans-connections. I feel like I'm only useful/acting to my full potential in the world when I'm interacting with others, preferably face-to-face. I mean, the first thing I've done in moving to a new city is think up ways to "put myself out there" so that I could make new friends, and in my down time from that I'm usually devising ways to reconnect with old friends.
What I dislike is being surrounded by people who don't want to talk to me. Heck, I think I'd take being the last person on earth better than that. That's not to say I don't feel what fourtines is saying though. I've had some good times sitting in parks, but in those cases I've been excited about all the possible connections I could make with the people around me. I don't even need to act on them; the fantasies are enough!
What I dislike is being surrounded by people who don't want to talk to me. Heck, I think I'd take being the last person on earth better than that. That's not to say I don't feel what fourtines is saying though. I've had some good times sitting in parks, but in those cases I've been excited about all the possible connections I could make with the people around me. I don't even need to act on them; the fantasies are enough!
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That's one of my worst fears. I'm not comfortable with being alone. But if that's what God ( or what some people might called fate or destiny) has for me, I have to deal with it.:crying:
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