I am having the ~worst~ time of it right now, and I was wondering if any of you have been here...
I've been with the same person for almost 1 whole year, making it my 2nd longest relationship ever... I joke to friends that my longest relationship I've ever had has been with my dog. :tongue: We were so magnetically drawn to each other. After my last relationship, I took some "me time" and really figured out who I was and what I could and couldn't change about myself in order to maintain personal truth and integrity. In this discovery, I acknowledged my thorough "ENFP-ness", and decided it wasn't something I could try to keep fighting. :laughing:
He is on the total opposite spectrum... a very thorough INTJ. (He actually posts on their forum and everything.) We fell stupidly, madly, passionately in love. We moved in together after 6 weeks, and we've been together ever since.
The problem is... he hadn't done any soul-searching after his previous relationship, and being with me has helped him grow and figure himself out... and he's figured out that a lot of the things that he needs (TONS of alone time, security, stability, clear-mindedness) are in direct conflict with what I need (TONS of time with people, the ability to fly away any time I need to, spontaneity, emotional intimacy, etc.)...
I find myself totally unable to leave. We have had conversation after conversation about how we're so wrong for each other, but we're amazing in bed together, we have fun together, we take care of each other, and we still love each other. Our discussions alternate between how miserable and restricted we feel around each other, and how much we are in love.
Yet, simply put, I have been crying my eyes out every night after he goes to sleep for the last 4 months. It occurred to me that this may perhaps be an ENFP thing, and I was wondering if you had any advice or stories to share with me. I want to leave, but I can't seem to actually get my feet moving, and seeing as he's the first person I've ever really REALLY loved, I can't just disconnect for some reason.