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Unfortunetly, I've noticed that a lot of these don't last very long. Especially with sensors.
Enneagram 7 marriages
[Enneagram Type 7]
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i think for me personally,
being a type 7-wing 8... (ENxP) a little weighted towards ENTP...
1) i believe, that i need to marry a Type 1 because I really want an ENFP wife...
2) also i believe it is a requirement for me to "want" to make my wife happy, so....
in order to get #2, i must make a Type 1 happy, because a happy Type 1 = Type 7 = ENFP
in turn, she makes me happy, thus, I become a Type 5 and im able to provide for her endlessly... and happily ever after...
sooo....
recap...
1) what personality type do u really love to hang out with all the time?
2) take ur answer from 1) and classify that = your soulmate's growth Type
3) make her happy, and she will make you happy!
being a type 7-wing 8... (ENxP) a little weighted towards ENTP...
1) i believe, that i need to marry a Type 1 because I really want an ENFP wife...
2) also i believe it is a requirement for me to "want" to make my wife happy, so....
in order to get #2, i must make a Type 1 happy, because a happy Type 1 = Type 7 = ENFP
in turn, she makes me happy, thus, I become a Type 5 and im able to provide for her endlessly... and happily ever after...
sooo....
recap...
1) what personality type do u really love to hang out with all the time?
2) take ur answer from 1) and classify that = your soulmate's growth Type
3) make her happy, and she will make you happy!
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277 Posts
I don't think it has to do with the type - more with the person. If they make a stupid decision that's their own fault.
In regards to 7s who enter a marriage with the hope of keeping it intact forever and then failing, it's because of a few reasons.
1) We take things a day at a time - it's hard for some of us to make long-term commitments when there are so many options to take.
2) If the relationship is stagnant, some 7s would rather cut ties than work through problems, which then allows them to avoid the pain of the situation.
3) Being single can be really fun. It can equal total freedom to a 7.
Not that I've ever dealt with it myself... I think it's something that people generalize about 7s (the flightiness), but there's a grain of truth to it because of our tendency to avoid pain and suffering and our need for freedom.
In regards to 7s who enter a marriage with the hope of keeping it intact forever and then failing, it's because of a few reasons.
1) We take things a day at a time - it's hard for some of us to make long-term commitments when there are so many options to take.
2) If the relationship is stagnant, some 7s would rather cut ties than work through problems, which then allows them to avoid the pain of the situation.
3) Being single can be really fun. It can equal total freedom to a 7.
Not that I've ever dealt with it myself... I think it's something that people generalize about 7s (the flightiness), but there's a grain of truth to it because of our tendency to avoid pain and suffering and our need for freedom.
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I don't think it's fair to say it's a type thing either. I've never been married, but I'm capable of having a long relationship - when it's right it's right. Any type can have difficulty with relationships, they're difficult things. I would actually like to be married to someone with a 7 maybe not as their strongest type, but second or third because I think optimism and fun are key in long-term relationships.
I know a few 7's and timing seems to play a big role as to if they settle down or not. At some points in their life they're so outgoing I don't think the perfect mate could make them want to stop flipping from one partner to another. At some point that gets old and they settle down with the right person. I'm sure the matter of partner vs. individual's status is a huge debate with many variables.
From my experience in the restaurant business many 20 year-olds who are 7's haven't settled down. 2's and 6's, which are abundant, are at least in a relationship very often. The 7w6 girl I know has settled down with a 6w7. A guy I work with (7w8) is with a 9w8. I would say it's 3 to 1 ratio of single to in a serious relationship when it comes to 7's.
From my experience in the restaurant business many 20 year-olds who are 7's haven't settled down. 2's and 6's, which are abundant, are at least in a relationship very often. The 7w6 girl I know has settled down with a 6w7. A guy I work with (7w8) is with a 9w8. I would say it's 3 to 1 ratio of single to in a serious relationship when it comes to 7's.
This is not how this works
Wouldn't this apply to the average person? Especially the bolded part.
The spontaneous nature of a 7 makes influences that timing. It seems to take a bit before 7's settle down with all of the partying and such. True, I am basing this completely off stereotype and personal experience. I don't pretend to have the all the answers, just an understanding.
Okay, it's based off stereotypes and your personal experience. However, from my personal experience, timing can be an issue for anyone as it relates to settling down.
I could go for a type 7 marriage ;D
@Eerie
I know that's right. You will never be bored and you will have some to share new adventures with.
From my experience and reasoning 7's seem to enjoy the single life more than other types, which makes timing more of an issue. I can't really expand on this any better. Take it for what it is. I'm done explaining myself.
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277 Posts
Every enneatype has potentialreasons why a marriage would fail. Beware, these could be stereotypical, but all problems apply to all people. It's just that if you have to type the behavior, here's how I'd do it.
1: Has to have everything constantly be "good" or "okay" in a marriage. Might nitpick a lot or, conversely, pretend that everything is okay to give it a sense of perfection.
2: Needs a lot of love from their partner and could be really needy or manipulative in order to get the affection they crave.
3: Similar to the 1, needs the image of the marriage to be good, even if it isn't, because they don't want to look like they're unraveling. They may be unwilling to show their partners what they perceive to be "undesirable" parts of their personalities.
4: Could idealize the marriage as being the perfect relationship.
5: Might withdraw into their heads too much and neglect their partner.
6: Fear and caution as well as the need to rebel and push might hold them back.
7: see discussion.
8: a refusal to admit weaknesses and the need for controlling the environment.
9: a tendency to avoid problems in the relationship to keep up the illusion of happiness.
Thoughts?
1: Has to have everything constantly be "good" or "okay" in a marriage. Might nitpick a lot or, conversely, pretend that everything is okay to give it a sense of perfection.
2: Needs a lot of love from their partner and could be really needy or manipulative in order to get the affection they crave.
3: Similar to the 1, needs the image of the marriage to be good, even if it isn't, because they don't want to look like they're unraveling. They may be unwilling to show their partners what they perceive to be "undesirable" parts of their personalities.
4: Could idealize the marriage as being the perfect relationship.
5: Might withdraw into their heads too much and neglect their partner.
6: Fear and caution as well as the need to rebel and push might hold them back.
7: see discussion.
8: a refusal to admit weaknesses and the need for controlling the environment.
9: a tendency to avoid problems in the relationship to keep up the illusion of happiness.
Thoughts?
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good luck finding an ENFP 1. they're pretty rare. could I suggest an ENFP 3? they would still have the organized, disciplined, pragmatic side of the 1 and they're much more common among ENFPs. plus ENFP 3s tend to be more chill than 1s and could match your positive 7 energy
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I was with a 7 for a year and a half...and this is most definitely descriptive of him. However, I can see WHY he did these things. With me being a One (and often overly-critical), why WOULD he want to share his inner-most, ugliest personality traits? Or even admit to any problems? It would've made grounds for me to gloat or try to fix things that were, in his opinion, "not broken".
However, these are some of the main reasons that the relationship ended the way it did. As a One, I am often finding problems with things (especially in relationships) and enjoy talking it out or fixing them. He denied that any problems existed. Therefore, there was a complete impasse.
On the other hand, though, I think he really wanted it to work. I don't think he was too keen on jumping from relationship to relationship. After I broke his heart, though, he was jumping from one girl to the next. I do believe he WILL find stability again, though.
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