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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Might somone of enneagram 9 put off responding to new messages from someone if they missed responding to a few messages before that to avoid conflict? If so, what could be said to ease or restore communication if you don't see this person on a regular basis?
 

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It seems possible to me, but maybe conflict isnt the issue and what they are looking to avoid is a pushy questioning instead.

I guess that can be viewed as conflict though.
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
It seems possible to me, but maybe conflict isnt the issue and what they are looking to avoid is a pushy questioning instead.

I guess that can be viewed as conflict though.
Yes that's actually what I meant. Made many attempts to reach out, but I am wondering if they might be letting this whole thing "snowball," as they might feel be putting this off because of it being uncomfortable. If you are enneagram 9, what would you like to hear to invite communication and avoid being probing?
 

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Im unsettled on my enneagram personally, i do believe i have some 9 influence though or at least enough to understand how something like this would disturb the equilibrium of a 9.

Id like to see someone isnt being pushy or not receptive with me but instead patient and willing from their reactions to me explaining the reasons of my withdrawal from interacting with them. That said, i rarely if ever detach from someone on purpose that way without explaining the reasons, if i "get lost" from social media or means of contact it usually implies something strictly personal is bothering me.

I like to believe i tend to be very clear with my distance most of the time.
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
Im unsettled on my enneagram personally, i do believe i have some 9 influence though or at least enough to understand how something like this would disturb the equilibrium of a 9.

Id like to see someone isnt being pushy or not receptive with me but instead patient and willing from their reactions to me explaining the reasons of my withdrawal from interacting with them. That said, i rarely if ever detach from someone on purpose that way without explaining the reasons, if i "get lost" from social media or means of contact it usually implies something strictly personal is bothering me.

I like to believe i tend to be very clear with my distance most of the time.
Thank you for explanation:)
Do you think you can explain the part in bold a little more?
 

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For example if someone is overwhelming me with their reactions and is reluctant to see what im saying because of being more focused in receiving validation from me in the form of an apology or accepting their misunderstandings / accusations then that only shuts me down more / makes me more dismissive, i will just likely end the conversation in an abrupt manner as i wont see any point in explaining.

Their willingness to be receptive and let me explain properly first while also avoiding all the unnecessary drama, so i can see they are being understanding is something i view positively and makes me more eager to discuss. I just require some effort to be understanding, i dont care if they disagree or still have issues with me afterwards. I will accept that and apologize if i also see its my fault. I will try to listen to their view and understand it properly as well in return.
 

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Discussion Starter · #7 ·
For example if someone is overwhelming me with their reactions and is reluctant to see what im saying because of being more focused in receiving validation from me in the form of an apology or accepting their misunderstandings / accusations then that only shuts me down more / makes me more dismissive, i will just likely end the conversation in an abrupt manner as i wont see any point in explaining.

Their willingness to be receptive and let me explain properly first while also avoiding all the unnecessary drama, so i can see they are being understanding is something i view positively and makes me more eager to discuss. I just require some effort to be understanding, i dont care if they disagree or still have issues with me afterwards. I will accept that and apologize if i also see its my fault. I will try to listen to their view and understand it properly as well in return.
Thank you for the info :) There is a PM that I sent you
 
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