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Recently an ENTJ has been acting kind of interested in me, and we've been getting really close. We spend absolute aaages on the phone. He spills all his secrets to me, like literally everything, in return however, I have a bit of a problem trusting him coz it feels to me that he's so particular in the kind of person he'll let himself like, that I feel like I have to tiptoe around his expectations.
Anyway that has led me to not trust him fully with all my secrets, and sensing this, he has got really upset, demanded an explanation as to why I don't. In the end, I just told him I simply didn't HAVE any secrets.. which I don't think he's ever believed..

Have any of you guys felt that the INFPs you are friends with are very very private, to the point of frustration because they defy the efforts you put into getting to know them?
And for INFPs - have any of you guys had a similar problem with trusting ENTJs?
 

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Recently an ENTJ has been acting kind of interested in me, and we've been getting really close. We spend absolute aaages on the phone. He spills all his secrets to me, like literally everything, in return however, I have a bit of a problem trusting him coz it feels to me that he's so particular in the kind of person he'll let himself like, that I feel like I have to tiptoe around his expectations.
Anyway that has led me to not trust him fully with all my secrets, and sensing this, he has got really upset, demanded an explanation as to why I don't. In the end, I just told him I simply didn't HAVE any secrets.. which I don't think he's ever believed..

Have any of you guys felt that the INFPs you are friends with are very very private, to the point of frustration because they defy the efforts you put into getting to know them?
And for INFPs - have any of you guys had a similar problem with trusting ENTJs?
I'm pretty good at cracking people's shells; the only INFP I know has no problem sharing all her weaknesses and flaws with me because I'm a fairly altruistic person. I don't know if you could say the same for all ENTJ's though... it may not be a type thing as much as it is an individual personality thing. Then again, there's no romantic aspect to the relationship I have with the INFP I know so it's hard to tell how they might act if they're talking to someone they are pursuing. Doesn't seem to be an issue with friends.
 

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An ENTJ And A INFP--Good Match Or No?

Have any of you guys felt that the INFPs you are friends with are very very private, to the point of frustration because they defy the efforts you put into getting to know them?
... No? I probably don't even realize that they hide things. I mean, If they don't feel like telling, then I'm not supposed to know. Interest/potential relationship wise though, it would probably dampens my initial interest. 'Defy the efforts you put into getting to know them' = not interested > move on.
 

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Well my roommate and longtime friend is an ENTJ, and at first it was very frustrating as he crossed many many MANY personal boundaries and I would subtly imply that I was uncomfortable with whatever he was doing. He never really picked up on these subtle hints that most would pick up on, and tended to see what he could get away with so to speak. However, after I learned to communicate with him just plain openly, things have been great. We're extremely close, and it's almost a comical relationship to our other friends since we're always extremely blunt, and can't go 5 seconds without arguing about something pointless and stupid and are completely comfortable in yelling at each other and being completely direct. I would liken it to the relationship between Ray Romano's parents actually...except we're not gay/married.
Anyway what I'm trying to say is, these two types complement each other perfectly when there is open communication, but the INFP can't rely on the ENTJ to necessarily "pick up" on things that most other types would. However, they appreciate blunt honesty and can definitely take constructive criticism. At least that's with my experience.
 
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ENTJ can sometimes be pretty overwhelming and dominating for us INFPs. I actually have one good ENTJ friend, but it was auite a long way to get to there. ENTJs need to give us time and assurance that we can trust you and that there are no manipulative hidden agendas.
To show this to me, the best way was that my ENTJ friend took time to spend alone with me, without getting too close, like hiking and city tours and things like that. Once we are sure that you only have the best interest in us, we open up - for me even to the point as loungefly above said, that I started argueing about things with him without taking it personal ... and when this happens with an INFP it means a lot :wink:

In short - take some time alone with the INFP but dont be too pushy.

Good Luck:happy:
 

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... No? I probably don't even realize that they hide things. I mean, If they don't feel like telling, then I'm not supposed to know. Interest/potential relationship wise though, it would probably dampens my initial interest. 'Defy the efforts you put into getting to know them' = not interested > move on.
THIS!

If they don't tell me, then I figure I am not supposed to know and they may/may not tell me as time goes on.

I am infinitely more private than any INFP that I know. They *think* I am telling them my secrets so I let them presume what they will.
 

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I am infinitely more private than any INFP that I know. They *think* I am telling them my secrets so I let them presume what they will.
This.

My INFP friends think I am telling them personal matters that I don't tell anyone else, when in reality their social mannerisms make me uncomfortable and I don't really open up anything that I wouldn't tell the rest of the world. They are usually good at being able to tell what I'm feeling though, which is interesting because I don't feel very much. It's because of this that I don't let them open up to me (which they usually get frustrated with). I don't like to be that close to people and so if I let them tell me everything about themselves (they often try to) it makes me feel like I want to push them away as a defense mechanism.
 
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