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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Right, so a friend of a friend doesn't have a penis and is also an ENTP 3w4. Our mutual friend is of the opinion that we're "pretentiously perfect" for one another. However, she's not as cute as the girls I'm usually attracted to. She's also a grade below.

She's very intelligent (I still say I'm smarter), well dressed (I do eet better), classically trained in the viola and first chair in the orchestra, soloist in Chorus, and very wealthy (might be more wealthy than me, not sure). Pretty standard NT 3w4 sort of thing, and she self confirmed both typings prior to my telling her what I thought she was.

Most recent twitter image included:


She doesn't want a hookup, she wants a relationship.

So PerC, to date or not to date? Opinions on the matchup? Any experience or predictions on type dynamics? How to handle this sort of relationship if I decided to go into it? Might diminish social standing? Might be good for other things? Throw me some insight.
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
I don't date someone unless I really like them. You can't convince yourself to like a person. As hard as it is, when it comes to people it's better to lead with your emotions. Do you even have feelings for this girl?
I honestly have no clue. I feel sort of pressured into liking her because I feel like she's almost perfect and I wouldn't run across a similar opportunity any time soon, but at the same time I feel like she's a little too perfect?

I've been thinking about her a lot, but more in an analytical way?

I think I can convince myself to like a person, given the time and proper thingies.

No clue.

So you actually consider her* wealth before dating? That's fucking ridiculous, mate.


*It's not her wealth, it's her parents?
Never have before. In this situation I just feel like I'm comparing her to each aspect of me and trying to figure her out that way, and found that to be an interesting detail?

*Eh, she also has a 103% average (not sure how she's an ENTP with that, but otherwise she matches perfectly and still manages to procrastinate into the wee hours of the morning), near perfect SATs, above listed extracurricular activities, and enough family money to pay to get into northeastern universities, so she'll probably end up with money in her own right. I wouldn't be surprised to see her in Harvard Law in several years. Though that comment was more about her style of presentation than her spending abilities. But I'm also a 3w4, maybe that has something to do with it. I feel more like I'm predicting her potential for future success than I am making a judgement about her current finances.

This whole matter confuses me.
Bud, if you have to ask us you already know the answer.

Not necessarily. I always debate with myself over dating a girl before dating her so I don't do something stupid, but I couldn't come up with a solution, so I'm asking for input so I can better consider it.
 

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l feel like l'm on an episode of Frasier gone horribly wrong lol

edit:now l feel like Martin and OP is Niles talking about Marace :laughing:
You're replying to a gen z FYI :tongue:
 

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*Eh, she also has a 103% average (not sure how she's an ENTP with that, but otherwise she matches perfectly and still manages to procrastinate into the wee hours of the morning)
She may have a 103% average because female ENTPs can be ridic bright in school. I'm speaking as a 3w4 ENTP with a prev average in that range (the above 100% range).


...near perfect SATs, above listed extracurricular activities, and enough family money to pay to get into northeastern universities, so she'll probably end up with money in her own right. I wouldn't be surprised to see her in Harvard Law in several years. Though that comment was more about her style of presentation than her spending abilities. But I'm also a 3w4, maybe that has something to do with it. I feel more like I'm predicting her potential for future success than I am making a judgement about her current finances.
I'm gonna present this from her side and your side.

From her side (because this was my side once upon a time) she deserves better, much better, than someone who is with her for her intellect, wealth, future wealth, or HLaw potential. Especially if that someone is not even proud of her looks. I, being impressive in my own right :humble: have been with that person and I inevitably find out and it makes my 4wing (or as it feels, heart) want to barf. ENTP ladies get heart and conscience access sooner than guys bc society drills them into them.

From your side (which has also been my side, many times)... never never ever start a relationship because of another's qualifications and impressiveness. Those are the bad relationships.

Even worse, your parents and unwise friends will be all over someone so impressive and influence your 3 pride to keep the relationship going.
This is precisely how those WASPy divorces start.

The secret (and I've dated A LOT) as a 3w4 ENTP to a successful relationship (and those are the impressive ones to others as well; the ones that are easy for you and showcase you as a great partner)... is to find someone who ENTHRALLS your 4wing and SATISFIES your 3 enn.

That means what is unique about you... what do you secretly love... what makes you special.... seek to have THAT in common with your partner.

And make sure they are presentable in the ways you need them to be but do not base the relationship on that or it will be hollow.
 

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Is that her normal face? If that is her normal face I would definitely date her. It would be so fun to take her out and tell some random hot girl, I think my girlfriend likes you, then point her out. :happy:
 

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Right, so a friend of a friend doesn't have a penis and is also an ENTP 3w4. Our mutual friend is of the opinion that we're "pretentiously perfect" for one another. However, she's not as cute as the girls I'm usually attracted to. She's also a grade below.

She's very intelligent (I still say I'm smarter), well dressed (I do eet better), classically trained in the viola and first chair in the orchestra, soloist in Chorus, and very wealthy (might be more wealthy than me, not sure). Pretty standard NT 3w4 sort of thing, and she self confirmed both typings prior to my telling her what I thought she was.

Most recent twitter image included:


She doesn't want a hookup, she wants a relationship.

So PerC, to date or not to date? Opinions on the matchup? Any experience or predictions on type dynamics? How to handle this sort of relationship if I decided to go into it? Might diminish social standing? Might be good for other things? Throw me some insight.
I'm gonna give you some optimism to balance out the pessimism. I've actually read all of the ENTP-ENTP love stories here in the last few days lol, so with a sample size of 20-30 now: I think it can definitely work. Feel free to ask about anything else:)
 

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I'm gonna give you some optimism to balance out the pessimism. I've actually read all of the ENTP-ENTP love stories here in the last few days lol, so with a sample size of 20-30 now: I think it can definitely work. Feel free to ask about anything else:)
Type-wise yes.

I just don't see any heart in this.

We're not actually discouraging him on type grounds but if you will, on lack of depth grounds.
 

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Type-wise yes.

I just don't see any heart in this.

We're not actually discouraging him on type grounds but if you will, on lack of depth grounds.
not an entp-entp debate but I thought these post by @SlowPoke68 were interesting

"Maybe a tendency here to think of MBTI type as like a chemical formula that DETERMINES behavior?

The main ENTP in my life and I--for as similar as we are--still are very different people. And being together has brought out parts of our characters that had been dormant before. I'm talking about complimentary characteristics."

and

"So many questions! Just go for it.

I'm in a relationship with one now (and have been in one way or another for most of the last 20 years). She's taught me so much about myself. You have to be ready for her to call you on your bs in a way that no others can."
 

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Discussion Starter · #19 ·
I'm amazed this thread got revived. I ended up dating an INFJ 5w4 instead of the ENTP 3w4, broke up with the INFJ after 2.5 months and tried to check in with the ENTP. The ENTP then hated me and blocked me on twitter etc. etc. (might be an ENTJ), so I proceeded to hook up with all of her friends (boredom as much as anything else). The ENTP/J finally started talking to me again about a month or two ago after she became best friends with the girl I'd been hooking up with for the last few months.

I'm presently out of town and have been having sex every night with an ISFP I met at an art museum (she's a docent-intern) (she's taking a shower right now), so the above isn't that relevant anymore.

Problems with the ENTP/ENTP pairing: Recognize that you are different people, different levels of maturity, and different things will cause issues. Do your interests and values line up as much as type? Do you want to go the same places in life? That sort of information seems to have more impact on my relationships than raw type.

I was with another ENTP while I was down here (interning at the congressional offices in an unnamed South Florida city), and I quickly found that our energy and mercurial natures kind of overloaded the interpersonal relationship and made it difficult for anything to grow. The sex was good though.
 
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