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Hi everyone. I'm new to mbti and I thought I was an introvert but I think I might actually be an ESFP. As a kid I was full of life and crazy. When I started to get older I would get bullied by others at school since I always drew attention to myself. The bullying lasted all the way until the end of high school. That changed how I behaved a lot. I became very shy and cautious around people. Even up to today it's a struggle between the person I've become and the person I really am on the inside. I'm wondering if any ESFPs can relate?

I've been seeing a therapist for quite awhile and that has helped. Hopefully I can go back to being my playful childish self someday.
Hi, I know this post is old, but maybe it's still valid. You never know! We are/were in a similar situation then. I was bullied for a large part of my childhood for being 'different' and standing out from the crowd, because I am noticeable. I have this thing, where I really want others to like me, yet I am unwilling and unable to conform to others' expectations of me. Personal integrity is an important value. However, due to all the bullying and all the judging, where the judging is filtering through to my adult life as well, I thought I was an introvert for very very long too. There was always someone louder, cooler, more loved to take all the attention away from me and if I don't have any attention when going out, I don't need to be there at all. Often, I would leave without saying my good-byes and then secretly sulk, because I believe no one ever noticed I was gone or cared. Unfortunately, depression isn't only something I tend to suffer, I have both parents on Zoloft, where in my father's family, clinical depression ran rampant. My luck is that I suffer it in bouts, not continually...

(...)Activities that do help people in your similar situation are meditation and exercise. Meditation would help with self-discovery—finding yourself again and exercise would tire you out so you wouldn't spend time worrying excessively, which I believe is an issue for you. Just really believe in yourself as a capable person and you should find yourself once again. Stay strong and peace be with you.

@marcguasch is right, what he recommends is helpful. For me, sports, activity and meditation help me stay in check and positive. Also, it helps to put yourself out there. Some people won't like you, but at the same time, if you aren't yourself, there's no way the right kind of people will spot you either.
 

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I am lurking here because I may have mistyped myself again. What's new...I thought I was an isfp for 2 years, then the past couple of months I embraced the intj label, but now I am thinking I may be an esfp. When I was young I was hyper and attention seeking, loved to be around huge groups of people and felt happy to create art or watch movies all day long. But then in high school, I completely flipped in personality. I became depressed, got an eating disorder, became existentially depressed, and suddenly couldnt connect with others anymore. Slowly I got out of it, thinking of my family's sake, and started exercising and doing art again. I ended up making more friends amongst my teachers though which never was the case, I felt more mature then. I took the official mbti test and got intj at that time. It is a strange issue to have, I dunno if Se is my superior or inferior function anymore. I have developed a strange aversion to Se related tasks now...I only draw once in a blue moon, I am scared to drive, I hate reading/memorizing with lots of details...
I also don't love people the way I used to. I am much more guarded and feel people make problems for themselves only by a lack of logic and pettiness.
But at the same time, I feel like something is missing in me. I am a 4w3 like many of you are...I thought id feel at home in the intj section but I realize I only gravitate to threads that involve emotions or helping each other out...I also realize when I do latch on to theories/ideas, I become a bubbling fanatic at first, which is really off putting to others around me because I get so caught up in it and preachy about it...then I stress over it, the isolation and loneliness from having found a cool idea and no one wanting to hear me talk about it, then feeling like I dont belong anywhere, then getting depressed. I know my whole family seems to be *sfp so maybe I just want to fit in...or could it be I really am one myself, and have just undergone a transformation to the intj side. But I really want to know what I am first because I feel uneasy...I get sad so often, I dunno if mistyping as someone I am not plays a role. As an isfp I felt not sure enough of my values and convictions to believe I am Fi first. Now as an Intj, I don't feel sure of my Ni because it has caused me to stray before. But Se is something I think I always rely on for "truth"...I could make many theories as I want, but if it is not verified by actual experience, my own experience, I throw it out fast. I also cant imagine a career without creativity and art...so many careers for intj include engineering and computer science which I find stuffy and stressful, I want a career with immediate results and tangible results vs utilizing the complex realm of too much thought. I also hate theoretical discussions without practical application or theories that seem too wild and out there. Sorry I used this post to vent about myself, just starting to wonder if I am one of you...a depressed esfp turned introvert..
 

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Hi everyone. I'm new to mbti and I thought I was an introvert but I think I might actually be an ESFP. As a kid I was full of life and crazy. When I started to get older I would get bullied by others at school since I always drew attention to myself. The bullying lasted all the way until the end of high school. That changed how I behaved a lot. I became very shy and cautious around people. Even up to today it's a struggle between the person I've become and the person I really am on the inside. I'm wondering if any ESFPs can relate?

I've been seeing a therapist for quite awhile and that has helped. Hopefully I can go back to being my playful childish self someday.
I am lurking here because I may have mistyped myself again. What's new...I thought I was an isfp for 2 years, then the past couple of months I embraced the intj label, but now I am thinking I may be an esfp. When I was young I was hyper and attention seeking, loved to be around huge groups of people and felt happy to create art or watch movies all day long. But then in high school, I completely flipped in personality. I became depressed, got an eating disorder, became existentially depressed, and suddenly couldnt connect with others anymore. Slowly I got out of it, thinking of my family's sake, and started exercising and doing art again. I ended up making more friends amongst my teachers though which never was the case, I felt more mature then. I took the official mbti test and got intj at that time. It is a strange issue to have, I dunno if Se is my superior or inferior function anymore. I have developed a strange aversion to Se related tasks now...I only draw once in a blue moon, I am scared to drive, I hate reading/memorizing with lots of details...
I also don't love people the way I used to. I am much more guarded and feel people make problems for themselves only by a lack of logic and pettiness.
But at the same time, I feel like something is missing in me. I am a 4w3 like many of you are...I thought id feel at home in the intj section but I realize I only gravitate to threads that involve emotions or helping each other out...I also realize when I do latch on to theories/ideas, I become a bubbling fanatic at first, which is really off putting to others around me because I get so caught up in it and preachy about it...then I stress over it, the isolation and loneliness from having found a cool idea and no one wanting to hear me talk about it, then feeling like I dont belong anywhere, then getting depressed. I know my whole family seems to be *sfp so maybe I just want to fit in...or could it be I really am one myself, and have just undergone a transformation to the intj side. But I really want to know what I am first because I feel uneasy...I get sad so often, I dunno if mistyping as someone I am not plays a role. As an isfp I felt not sure enough of my values and convictions to believe I am Fi first. Now as an Intj, I don't feel sure of my Ni because it has caused me to stray before. But Se is something I think I always rely on for "truth"...I could make many theories as I want, but if it is not verified by actual experience, my own experience, I throw it out fast. I also cant imagine a career without creativity and art...so many careers for intj include engineering and computer science which I find stuffy and stressful, I want a career with immediate results and tangible results vs utilizing the complex realm of too much thought. I also hate theoretical discussions without practical application or theories that seem too wild and out there. Sorry I used this post to vent about myself, just starting to wonder if I am one of you...a depressed esfp turned introvert..
Hi :) To be honest, you come across as intuitive to me, just by impression from your text, rather than through true analysis. However, if you're struggling to type yourself and you're not doing things in life you want to do and behaving the way you find most natural, it will be easiest to type yourself once you've let go and let yourself be you. It will help with the depression a little too. That's what it was for me at least. I've become awfully quiet and shy in certain situations and feared being judged, but at one point I just decided to go by the 'what's the worst that could happen?' and just go for it. Better to run free and sometimes break your nose on a wall than to sit in a corner, trying to figure shit out passively:wink:
 

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Thanks. I just wrote two personal blog posts right now and after that felt like almost 100 percent I may be an esfp. If you can, u can read it on my page though its long and personal and i may have been rambling. I changed my label just now just to see how it feels. Like you said, run free. Haha.

But I do overanalyze a lot like an intuitive but I think my life circumstances have shaped that more than anything. I don't expect I would fit in with many *sfps now especially with my entire family, I talk way more and discuss ideas at length till they quickly switch topics on me to talk about something else. But then again, most of my friends seem to be *sfp too and dont think im completely out there...especially when they always ask me for advice. I also can talk about things like mbti theory at length, but I don't feel really comfortable when others do irl. Isn't that unfair? Haha. Also any ideas and theories I discuss must have practical application and based more on reality...anything too out there or wild makes me suspicious and nervous.
 
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@Ryosuke93 You sound like you could fit with us ESFPs:wink: What you wrote above I can somewhat identify with:laughing: Except, most of my family is NFP, so on the other hand, I can hold my own with the Ne discussions. I just don't enjoy it.
 
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Thanks! I actually am not clinically depressed anymore. But I do feel a significant change in my personality due to those episodes.

I hope though that finding my type can help allude to what I naturally can be. I feel like I have had tunnel vision for so many years...brought on by Ni maybe...now perhaps I can try some more Se exploration. I have always felt like Se activities were healing for me...but never knew why and still never saw it as priority in my life. But now I can see perhaps Se was trying to reclaim my psyche and pull it back as the dominant function.i guess i should listen and get in touch with the world again more and more instead of staying shut in my mind.
 
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Hi everyone. I'm new to mbti and I thought I was an introvert but I think I might actually be an ESFP. As a kid I was full of life and crazy. When I started to get older I would get bullied by others at school since I always drew attention to myself. The bullying lasted all the way until the end of high school. That changed how I behaved a lot. I became very shy and cautious around people. Even up to today it's a struggle between the person I've become and the person I really am on the inside. I'm wondering if any ESFPs can relate?

I've been seeing a therapist for quite awhile and that has helped. Hopefully I can go back to being my playful childish self someday.
Hi, I know that this thread is really old, but I relate to anything that you said



I'm here just wanted to tell how I deal with depression that would probably works for us
in case any of new ESFPs that needs help too and came to this thread

1. Since we have Se as our dominant function, exercise would probably helps a lot, trust me. even if just only running around neighborhood or using a treadmill. Make sure before you're going to sleep, remember that tomorrow is going to be your new day. so when u're awake, make sure you're able to exercise (Everyday would be much better), then u can feel the difference, it helps u reduce your anxiety and stress, will also help you think clearer. Not only exercising, play musical instrument also helps too.

2. Meditation. try to meditate and keeps everything all calm, and peace. You could find how to meditate on YouTube, or search it up on google. By meditating we lower our stress level and reduce our anxieties too. Less to think about taking risk actions, so meditation really helps you to keep calm.

3. If things getting worse for you, try to talk with someone that understands you. Try reach out for help to them or talk to counselor. vent everything about it because your feelings matter. we're just human, don't try to keep it all inside and stop having the expectation of yourself, especially when it is giving you a hard time.

4. Stop self- negativity. Stop thinking how different you are with others, stop thinking about any negatives thoughts about you from others perspective. stop thinking about it. Take it as something to build in your better version. And learn to cherish yourself. Learn that you are special, you have this ability to understand people's feelings. You could learn new abilities easier and even faster, u could adapt to newer things too. you're special.

5. If you ever have a journal, try to write on it and vent anything on there. I used to wrote everything on Journal but try to avoid re reading it until I got out from all of my anxieties. I could re - read it so I could learn from it. Just to make all clear up, and know that past is past.

I hope it helps <3
 
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