Personality Cafe banner

ESTJ's and cheating

22737 Views 17 Replies 14 Participants Last post by  chocolatefox
ESTJ's, what are your views and thought about cheating?

I have an ESTJ friend who seems to keep his gf a secret and is always flirting with the ladies and has even made some advances at a friend or two, yet when you ask about the way he thinks, he says he's very loyal and is just 'friendly'..

just wondering if there is a correlation with his type or if it's just HIM because i thought ESTJ's are very boundaries- based and usually have a high ethical compass..
  • Like
Reactions: 1
1 - 1 of 18 Posts
I suppose it depends on your definition of cheating. In my opinion cheating is when you intentionally have sex with someone other than your partner or kiss them for a prolong period of time. I am not a cheater, nor will I ever be one and those who do end up cheating lose my respect almost immediately.

But I do understand completely what your friend is talking about/doing. I myself am a big flirt. I love talking to people, laughing with people, teasing people, making others laugh etc. Often this can be seen as flirting, when really all I notice is that I'm being really friendly with people. I think in general this is often associated with extroverted thinker types. We love to be out talking to all sorts of people and having a good time with them, so naturally we're all a bit flirty. However, we are also T's so what comes out of mouths most likely has nothing to do with intense feelings we have for someone, in fact I tend to back down and become more serious if I actually am interested in someone. But for the rest of the people in the world they get to have my light flirty side.

I will say though, that if it does make our partner a bit jealous, and we know it that almost makes it more fun. We tend to be pretty confident, but occasionally its nice to know that your partner can get jealous if you're talking to someone else for a long time. Every needs to feel really wanted now and then. :)

Also, as someone who has a degree in biology, I will say that there's a very human nature side to cheating. Monogamy really doesnt occur very often in the world. In fact its very very rare. So even if we are monogamous there will always be a part of us that may find someone else a bit more attractive or more fun to be with. Its not ideal of course especially if you believe in soulmates, but it happens. Its just whether you act on it or not that makes you cheater. I once had some guy kiss me when I was already involved with someone else. We were having a good time and I think I just may have given him the wrong idea accidentally. But when it happened I just told him that I was involved with someone else and he and I were just friends. I actually did tell my boyfriend about this later. At first he got really mad and jealous, but then I explained that he is also a flirt and sometimes leads people on as well, so he got pretty quiet after that lol.

So ESTJ's as cheaters? Absolutely not. Flirty/friendly? Yes, I would say most definitely
See less See more
  • Like
Reactions: 3
1 - 1 of 18 Posts
This is an older thread, you may not receive a response, and could be reviving an old thread. Please consider creating a new thread.