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INTP sp/so 9w1 6w5 4w5
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and it's too late now anyway.
Don't want to milk it for all it's worth? (Sorry...ish. :tongue:)

You should come in to work tomorrow with one fingernail painted orange. You know, as a warning.
 

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me: my pressure cooker has been irretrievably locked shut since monday night. i am very discouraged.
her: why?
me: do you mean why discouraged, or why is it locked?
her: ...
me: please don't make me shriek IF I KNEW THAT DON'T YOU THINK I WOULD FIX IT at you.
her: don't ask me. pressure cookers scare me. t he only solution i can think of is a nice bush somewhere far away that you can hide it under.
me: i know i need to take it to the small-appliance recyclers. it's just, it's full of very dead rice and i feel bad about it.
her: personally, i think the rice is more likely to be alive, which is a bigger worry.
me: hah.
her: wait long enough and it will develop enough intelligence to stage a breakout from inside. problem fixed.
me: much the best plan. i agree.
 

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(Sorry...ish. :tongue:)
uhhh . . . you so should be. good grief.

You should come in to work tomorrow with one fingernail painted orange. You know, as a warning.
heh. and say 'now, we're not here to point fingers', maybe.

me: my pressure cooker
so, the addendum to this:

me: i diddit. disposed of the thing
her: bush or good-citizen style?
me: good citizen. i even told the guy there was still stuff inside it.
her: that was nice of you.
me: weird thing though. i'm still puzzled. i tell him this and he says 'what ... like organic stuff?'
her: that IS odd. "no, a stegasaurus"?
me: well, that would be organic.
her: not if it's 2019. which, last time i looked, it was.
me: well, anyway it is gone.
 

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My ESFJ mother is in denial of being Mexican (she’s second generation Mexican American):

ESFJ: my parents never celebrated ‘Day of the Dead’, I don’t think your grandparents ever celebrated it even when they lived in Mexico.

1 day later:

ESFJ: Well, your grandmother called me today...she was insisting on me going to grandpa’s grave for “Day of the Dead”

Me: how ironic...

ESFJ: *gives me the “wipe that smirk off your face” look*



Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 

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i can't remember the full lead-in to this, but it was something about . . . well, yeah. counsellor was telling me about a parallel kind of case, where the client he's seeing is physically unable to get out of bed every day.

me: *rant* *rave* *rage* so what's stopping me from just doing that too?
counsellor: i don't know. do you want to do it?
me: no, of course not.
him: -
me: i might do it though, to prove a point.

this mostly sticks in my mind now because he cracked up.
 

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More of a conversation with myself.
Scrolling through social media, I see this posted by 2 different (one confirmed INFJ, one likely ISFJ) friends:

no.JPG

Me, automatically in my head: "Nope."
*Keeps scrolling*

:crazy:
 
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This happened a little while ago..still makes me laugh sometimes. Living with my sister and brother in law has been amusing.

Travels with my sister (ISTP) and bro-in-law (ISFJ) to get their new puppy..

-ISFJ bro driving. An Oscar Meyer weinermobile passed by the opposite direction on the freeway-

ISTP sister: WEINERMOBILE! WEINERMOBILE!! DO YOU SEE IT?!?!
Me: *looks and sees* yeah!! :laughing::laughing:
ISTP-S: ISFJ! Did you see it????
ISFJ-BIL: No
ISTP-S: look in the rear view!!
ISFJ-BIL: I don’t see it
ISTP-S: when I yell “weinermobile” you have to look!!!
ISFJ-BIL: you yell random shit all the time!!!
Me: :laughing::laughing::laughing::bored:
 
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A conversation from last Thursday with me trying to make a plan for my INFP and ISTP friends to go to Disneyland.

Me: Okay guys, I’m going to get to the park around 11am (I wanted to get out of the house because my parents housekeepers were scheduled that day) to get a locker and scope things out. (I was also on the hunt for Haunted Mansion merchandise because that’s my favorite ride and let’s just say I was decked out in most of my Haunted Mansion gear) you guys are will be meeting me around 4pm.

Male INFP: you need to be spontaneous

Me: what?

INFP: you’re trying to plan out a Disneyland trip, you need to live in the moment.

Female ISTP: I love being spontaneous

INFP: you can’t plan Disneyland

Me: I just want everyone to be on the same page and maximize our time because it’s going to be crowded.

ISTP: but we’re staying till closing, we’ll have time to wait in line.

INFP: you’re such an INTJ, stop planning! BE SPONTANEOUS!

Me: I DON’T DO SPONTANEOUS!

INFP: just try

Me: I’m going to physically drag you on to Small World

INFP: NO! You’re evil!

Me: it’s a world of laughter and a world of *INFP’s name redacted*’s tears

ISTP:

Me: keep it up, INFP...your suffering will only bring me joy

INFP: then we are going on the Farris wheel

Me: you’ll get me on there when I’m dead!

ISTP: why are you afraid of Mickey’s Fun Wheel?

Me: THE GONDOLAS SWING AND SLIDE OVER WATER! I’LL TAKE THE SINGING NIGHTMARE DOLLS!

ISTP:

INFP: you need to stop overthinking

Me: just meet me there at 4pm...

I later got my revenge by physically dragging them on to the Little Mermaid ride while ISTP gave me the stink face while I belted “Part of your world” and INFP was begging to get off the ride. I ended up at doing both Disneyland and California Adventure for 12 hours straight and my legs are still recovering.



Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 

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ESTJ: For the white elephant gift exchange, the range you should spend is around 15 to 20 dollars. Does that sound okay with everyone?
Employee 1: Yeah.
Employee 2: Fine with me.
Employee 3: Sounds fine.
INTJ: You're just lucky I like you people.
Group: :shocked:
ESTJ: You know what INTJ, you can take that comment and shove it up your ass.
INTJ: Why, when you're so good at doing it for me? :smug:
ESTJ: Motherfucker. :laughing:




I need more ESTJ in my life. :heart:
 

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i found this regrettably hilarious. discussing a british-academic colleague of hers who seems to be having some sort of midlife crisis.

my sister: he got one of those australian sheepherder raincoats a while ago.
me: i know the type. i think? j had one. AND the hat.
her: here's discussion among the rest us who's going to tell him it smells like a dingo died in it.
me: why doesn't he just buy a red motorcycle or reboot himself as a rap god, one wonders.
her: we can't work out how come he doesn't know. don't his wife and kid tell him?
me: maybe they hate him.
her: that wouldn't surprise me at all. we do. honestly; you can smell him coming.

reprise; this morning.

me: has it occurred to any of you that perhaps HE hates YOU?
her: hmmm. worthy of consideration.
 

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me: someone just gave me a pannetone. am i happy?
sister: i quite like pannetone, but not enough to pay for it.
me: what's weird to me is how you'd spend any time making it.
her: not a fan?
me: well, it's seriously weird.
her: eh, bread with bits in it isn't everyone's thing.
me: no, it's not that. it's just, it tastes of granny's flat in klerksdorp.
her: !!! THAT's what that is!
me: phew.
both of us: *silent thoughts of our 1820-settler granny in klerksdorp*
both of us: this doesn't make any sense.
 

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squishy programmer: *sends image*
me: aww.
her: geese walked across wet concrete
me: canada?
her: i didn't ask for their passports.
me: heh.
her: of course canada. what other kind is there?
me: snow. russian.
her: fecking.
me: of course. "get off my lawn!"
her: AND my concrete.
me: those fecking geese.
 

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Lady in front of me at the store (talking to the cashier): yea, we don't do dairy or sugars. Our digestion is so much better...

Me: *loading dark cherry ice cream, raclette, along with various other sugars and dairy products onto the conveyer belt*

Oh SoCal, I'll miss you.

But maybe not that part :laughing:
 

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-weird beeping noises-

ESTJ: What is that?
INTJ: I don't know... -looks around- It sounds louder right here...
ESTJ: Is it the door?
INTJ: No it.. oh... oh no. It's my phone... -pulls phone out of pocket and stares at it- Oh shit. I'm not telling you what it is. :laughing:
ESTJ: -eyes wide- What is it? You have to tell me!! What... is it... why are you turning red? Is it something sexy?
INTJ: It's.... it's... oh god this is embarrassing...
ESTJ: -edge of seat-
INTJ: It is my Stargazing app. It was tracking a satellite. See? -shows satellite on screen beeping-
ESTJ: :bored: You're such a fucking nerd and I hate you. Go away.
 

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ESTJ: Wow, there are four “i”s in the word responsibilities.
INTJ: Of course there are. All “i”s and no “u”s.
ESTJ: God damn it INTJ...
INTJ: There is never a “u” in responsibilities.
ESTJ: Shut the fuck up!

~one hour later~

INTJ: Hey ESTJ.
ESTJ: What?
INTJ: Can you guess how many “i”s are in the word... maintenance?
ESTJ: Argh! Can you guess how many pens I am about to throw at your smart ass?

I probably shouldn’t enjoy this as much as I do...
 
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