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Maybe I'm making a mistake and should just post to ENTPs and emotions but I was planning to tackle sort of a different idea, here.

As an ENTP, when I smell trouble in any sort of relationship, be it personal or professional, I reach out. I've noticed that for INTPs this usually equates to becoming more "understanding" or sympathetic, and other Fe users such as INFJs will also "try to help," usually with a quieter, more soothing edge than the ENTP, who might be like, "HELP ME HELP YOU" as opposed to, "Want to tell me about it?"

My question is: how do you handle being ignored when you reach out, and how hard is it for you? I've seen tendencies toward masochism develop in Fe users who try to teach themselves to "accept" that pain and wind up addicted to it, and it is not a heartening thing to behold.
 

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If I sense someone needs advice, I'll give them some. If I see they don't value my advice I'm not going to try again. Ain't my problem. If they do value my advice I'm happy to offer more. If they become a leech, however, I make them disappear.
 

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some people want to complain and complain and complain.

If they complain, I'll listen, if they go on for too long ill offer a sollution... if they keep it up i really dont care anymore they can whine about it to someone else from now on.
 

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Maybe I'm making a mistake and should just post to ENTPs and emotions but I was planning to tackle sort of a different idea, here.

As an ENTP, when I smell trouble in any sort of relationship, be it personal or professional, I reach out. I've noticed that for INTPs this usually equates to becoming more "understanding" or sympathetic, and other Fe users such as INFJs will also "try to help," usually with a quieter, more soothing edge than the ENTP, who might be like, "HELP ME HELP YOU" as opposed to, "Want to tell me about it?"

My question is: how do you handle being ignored when you reach out, and how hard is it for you? I've seen tendencies toward masochism develop in Fe users who try to teach themselves to "accept" that pain and wind up addicted to it, and it is not a heartening thing to behold.
Well, as a Fe-dom, I get impatient when people get upset with me and seem to not want to focus on fixing the issue.

I'm definitely the "HELP ME HELP YOU" type, or more like this:

Person bitching me out, usually screaming or crying.
Me: "Okay. OKAY. WHAT SHOULD I DO TO FIX THIS?"
Person bitches more.
Me: "You're not answering the question. WHAT CAN I DO TO RESOLVE THIS. Tell me WHAT I CAN DO FOR YOU."
Person cries louder.

I'm not great with conflict resolution. :crazy:
 

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Well, as a Fe-dom, I get impatient when people get upset with me and seem to not want to focus on fixing the issue.

I'm definitely the "HELP ME HELP YOU" type, or more like this:

Person bitching me out, usually screaming or crying.
Me: "Okay. OKAY. WHAT SHOULD I DO TO FIX THIS?"
Person bitches more.
Me: "You're not answering the question. WHAT CAN I DO TO RESOLVE THIS. Tell me WHAT I CAN DO FOR YOU."
Person cries louder.

I'm not great with conflict resolution. :crazy:
(dies) Didn't you used to be ENTP, God?



High-five though:

 

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(dies) Didn't you used to be ENTP, God?



High-five though:

Yeah, but I'ze got WAY more Fe than y'all. (<--- And that was weird. I'm a white Californian. I can't pull off the y'all.)
 

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I advise my "friends" constantly but never get any valuable advice in return. If they only looked at my intentions rather than my choice of words. I don't know if this is simply the culture and social attitudes but most of them frankly seem so self-centered as if the world rotates around them. I'll give them the benefit of the doubt. As a result, I stopped asking my friends for advice or expect anything in return, simply because I don't want to left stranded, especially emotionally stranded. There are friends I do ask for advice because they're dependable and most of them are not from the United States.

A solution would probably turning to family members. I turn to my family members who may not be in the best of shape and timing but they still sit down and listen. Sometimes, they come back to the topic 2-3 weeks from the discussion date and it intrigues me how concerned they are. From that point on, the discussions only get deeper and there is feedback. Doing so also has allowed me to see the values in family vs. friends because friends just don't give a shit or do they.

What my family (extended, not nuclear because I can't discuss anything with my nuclear family) do is that they give me their perspective on the issue, some possible solutions on behalf their perspective, and any offering aid if I need any. To me this is exceptionally helpful because I panic when I am stressed.

The difference between a familial bond and a friendship bond is that the latter can be broken without any connections but a family bond can be broken but the relation is still there.
 

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Yeah, but I'ze got WAY more Fe than y'all. (<--- And that was weird. I'm a white Californian. I can't pull off the y'all.)
How's the Ni working out for you?

IMO God always seemed pretty INTJish in the text. :mellow:
 

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come to think of it it makes sense that God is an ENFJ ... don't they make the best cult-leaders?

the tendency for masochism I think is the self-cirtical voice of Ti, it wants the self to succeed and when self fails then it is what makes you feel so bad as a consequence which can turn into depression and even self-hurt

the "help me help you" part I guess this is where the ENTP offers you a bunch of options and asks you to pick one?
I always understood it as way of helping but just don't get irritated when a person refuses your options (not everything will be a good solution for that person) and if they take something you suggested and it doesn't work for them don't blame them for wrong implementation of what you personally thought was the greatest idea ever, this just doesn't help
 

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I don't always reach out, I tend to think of other people's problems as their problems. if I do get involved with something emotional though, I find it very painful. I am totally not addicted to this kind of pain, and never will be. I like being breezy.
I think I have a fair few Fe characteristics, especially the tiptoeing round conflict and trying to please people ( at home/with friends, anyway) and the fact that it makes me so uncomfortable.....I don't know if it's because I am a tertiary Fe who uses Fe a lot, or someone who is pretty limited in Fe having to use it at all......
 

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I most often try to take the problem solving approach. The rest I believe is better left to the "Feelers" among us.
 

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How do you handle being ignored when you reach out, and how hard is it for you? .
Ha! Hell no. If someone doesn't take my advice then I just half listen to them bitch and I smile and nod and act understanding.

It isn't hard for me because their problem is not mine. The most I can do is give advice. Otherwise I can't sit around worrying about everybody elses problems. It's not going to solve them.

I think I get more irritated when I offer advice and then someone goes and does something that only makes their problems worse.

Some people get so attached to their feelings that they keep putting themselves back into the same situations. In the short term their way of handling things seems to make sense and they're happy but in the long term they end up miserable. Why they can't see this irriates me...especially when I have to listen to them bitch on a semi-regular basis.
 

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I wish i had feelings. I havent cried since i was like 10. Now im a big boy, and big boys dont cry because crying is WEAK.
Im not a sociopath tho. I can still feel guilt and depression.
 

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As an ENTP, when I smell trouble in any sort of relationship, be it personal or professional, I reach out. I've noticed that for INTPs this usually equates to becoming more "understanding" or sympathetic, and other Fe users such as INFJs will also "try to help," usually with a quieter, more soothing edge than the ENTP, who might be like, "HELP ME HELP YOU" as opposed to, "Want to tell me about it?"
This is one area where I tend to rely on my instincts and feelings as opposed to thought. If someone asks me to help with a solution, I will, but otherwise I will only do so if I feel it's VERY important. I focus on listening, making sure everyone is heard, and that people are calm.

My question is: how do you handle being ignored when you reach out, and how hard is it for you? I've seen tendencies toward masochism develop in Fe users who try to teach themselves to "accept" that pain and wind up addicted to it, and it is not a heartening thing to behold.
I hate being ignored, period. I rarely confront a person about it (unless the relationship is very important to me) because I'll just come off as crazy with emotional Ne expression all over the place. I try to wait until my irritation, anger, etc subsides so I can approach the situation in a clear manner.

(I sound kinda non-ENTP here. :unsure: )
 

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I have had lots of rejection in this area. It hurts. I dont think I am a masochist since I dont like it...:)

I have learned to just listen sometimes. The "patients" dont want logical problem solving. But when I try to solve peoples problems, OR show that I understand them, I can exemplify from own experience. And since I communicate a tad blurry - especially when describing my own feelings - I do long rants and come off as a self centered prick at times.... in spite of good intentions.

Normally people seek me out with their problems though. And I try to EXPLAIN points of view and how others are thinking which most often helps. I have given up hope of solving infected relationship problems or saving very damaged people. Unfortunately. It pains me to see the hurt and the issues so easily but not being able to help.

I seem very empathic compared to other ENTPs and that surprises me. But then again, one could hardly say my childhood and adolescence was "normal" and that might have shaped the me.

It is difficult to reach out to people who doesnt know me since I behave slightly "off the norm<". But I do wish the best for people. Negativism is such a energy-waste.
 
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