I do feel guilty for consequences of my own abuse or neglect as a general rule, and I feel very responsible for my own health.
So when I have some physical ailment, I have the perfectionist (but in my mind, pragmatic) thought: "If I had been living closer to my ideals, this could have been avoided." The sense of responsibility gives me a feeling of control over change and results, influencing my lifestyle, etc.
I forgive myself and don't judge my character from physical ailments, but it's a short leap from feeling guilty for neglecting ideals. If I think I could have prevented it, I do fight the notion of guilt - the antagonistic, internal question of "well why didn't you ___" resonates continuously...
The only true prevention of guilt for me is looking back and feeling like I was doing my best, and that's a tall order.
So when I have some physical ailment, I have the perfectionist (but in my mind, pragmatic) thought: "If I had been living closer to my ideals, this could have been avoided." The sense of responsibility gives me a feeling of control over change and results, influencing my lifestyle, etc.
I forgive myself and don't judge my character from physical ailments, but it's a short leap from feeling guilty for neglecting ideals. If I think I could have prevented it, I do fight the notion of guilt - the antagonistic, internal question of "well why didn't you ___" resonates continuously...
The only true prevention of guilt for me is looking back and feeling like I was doing my best, and that's a tall order.
