[Hiero]

Hi guys. I wanted to share something that happened to me this weekend. Forgive me for my bad english by the way, my main language is spanish.

I had a weird week. Spent it on the beach with my aunts and cousins and when we arrived my aunts started talking about life and the world, they asked me about what did I think about life and I answered: "I don't know. Being so young(I'm 20) I don't think I have the right or the experience to answer that question" and they replied: "Why do you say that? You have been through so much in your life so you should have an oppinion about life and the world", all that could say was "I don't really know. Often I think I don't deserve many things" and then they started to tell me how wrong I was about that, that I'm so pure and noble, like a diamond and so many nice things I don't think I am, I felt so overwhelmed then I just wanted to cry so I walked away and went to the water so they couldn't see my tears.

I'm a very quiet and shy person so I don't know how they could they hold such oppinions about me or maybe I'm more open than I think I am. I guess I should consider myself lucky for having a family that appreciates who I am.

I really wish I could have talked to them a bit longer. I don't really have many negative oppinions about life and the world. All I want to be is Brave so I can help people and tell them what I think.

Does anyone else feel like that when another person says nice things to you?
Maybe because I've been told how "weak" and and other mean things I was before that I started believing what they said about me so I can't really take any compliments as they being true.

 

[Kittann]

That was lovely to read, thank you. :]
It is nice when people appreciate you, I feel overwhelmed by it too if that's any help. Some people are insensitive, and really don't understand this personality (or other people at all, I think). Someone once told me they thought I couldn't survive in 'the real world', so I know what you mean.

I also feel so, so happy when I hear about acts of kindness on the news, they're like little beacons of good in a sea of bleakness.​

 

[Ekeh Mayu]

This reminds me of two things:

1) Compliments are a judgement. (so criticisms aren't the only one)
I can absolutely relate too. I apologize for people complimenting me.
I think perhaps you need to ask for the distance ( to cry ). Like a boundary, but not a defense. INFPs work at their own sense of time, their own wavelength. I can feel other people's energy pushing on me to make up some witty answer, like the energy I feel making a presentation in front of twenty people returning that energy. Really overwhelming, and eventually, I learned to block or hide what was inside of me.

Like apologizing. A lot of times when I genuinely apologize, I have to return to someone to apologize, like i've been thinking of you. That's like walking up a mountain. As for their questions, your role is perhaps to soak up their thoughts on you, then return back with them.
For me, hiding my feelings, even for myself makes my Fi feel like Ti.

For me and I think other INFPs (males?), the whole sea of people is an anxiety zone where it never feels safe to cry or show emotions.
I've asked other people if it was okay to cry, and then they disappear; but then I hid them alone this whole time so you could see them come out (...uh, existential crisis).

Off topic,

2) What you said reminds me of the character Gilbert Grape from What's Eating Gilbert Grape. The movie is slow moving, but you see the progression of Gilbert's emotions when his whole, small world doesn't seem accepting of everything he does.