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I'm so glad you do identify as a person first. I do when I'm alone, but out with people here much more so than in [S.W. United States, elsewhere], which is why I left [here] when I was 22, well, it's impossible to get away from the backward, obsessional nature of anti-everything contrasting what so many here consider normal and "God-given" and "God-approved."


I read a lot in the late 60s and 70s, on... to counteract the prejudices I grew up with but by that time I had already been sexually used by relatives, "examined by doctors" as well as my mother for parts that didn't appear normal to them (won't say more than that); and treated as a sexual "thing" to be taunted, mistreated, and otherwise identified and limited.


I never heard the word "fluid gender" or "gender queer" or many of the other trendy words for all that people talk about on this forum until, well, I was a member here, and I'd run across it.


I got so many labels and words and theories and categories and more in my head that I don't need to add to it.


My husband likes "gender fluid" for me far more than "androgynous."

Something about the second gets under his skin, but when I told him what [others] said about me, he looked thoughtful, soft and said, "Yes, that suits you." [gender fluid]


Everyone has their own perception of what words, phrases, diagnoses, and syndromes and such mean, and often, simply how they sound or feel to them.


I was raised in a world where it damn sure mattered which or what you were in terms of sex--narrow and niggling; constricting as hell.


And then the stuff like my bio-mom's prison experiences, sexual ones; and how she later went on to openly condemn gays including my first cousin after his younger brother and I paid him a surprise visit in Florida--and we were the ones who got the biggest surprise when we met "Maxine", aka Mac.


My mother never relented after a short spell; he wasn't welcome in her home.
So when she and others (sibs and such) hinted or asked about my sexuality, or I heard the rumors?

I knew to keep the little bit of privacy I had regarding that to myself. I simply denied and explained away my behaviors as what some others called free spirited and open-minded, and trying to educate others so they wouldn't be so hating:


All which was true, just not the whole truth.


Good to see you [Babe].

Happy Holidays to you. Be safe; warm; and feel cared for--I hope that for you, and for all of us.
 
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