I posted this on the INTJ part of personality cafe, but I didn't get much of a response. I was thinking because the ENFP board and its members are a bit more active, so to speak, that I might get a better answer here.
I have trouble with the distinction between friends with benefits and sexual relationships. As I understand it a relationship is when 2 ( lets stick with 2) individuals enjoy each others company, spend time together, and get romantic. A friend with benefits is someone who is a friend, whom you get romantic with. A hook-up is just a one night thing so I am not really asking about hook-ups.
I thought being friends was the same thing as enjoying each others company and spending time together. In addition, either a relationship or a friends with benefits situation can be monogamous or polyamorous so I don't see why the number of people involved in that sense would matter.
Am I the only one a little confused here? If you are friends with someone and get romantic with them, how (or why) are you not just dating? Is friends with benefits just a label for people who are acquaintances (friends lite), who get horney and/or drunk and hook-up to absolve themselves of any emotional or personal responsibility?
I am obviously not somebody who is into casual encounters, and people's personal decisions are their own business, but I am awfully curious how about people reconcile what appears to be this discrepancy. I am guessing everyone defines these things a little differently, but maybe not. I really am clueless on this one, maybe its because I'm an Aspie (and INTJ) so have the emotional sophistication of an 8 year old. Nonetheless, I was hoping for a logical explanation of this.
thanks
I have trouble with the distinction between friends with benefits and sexual relationships. As I understand it a relationship is when 2 ( lets stick with 2) individuals enjoy each others company, spend time together, and get romantic. A friend with benefits is someone who is a friend, whom you get romantic with. A hook-up is just a one night thing so I am not really asking about hook-ups.
I thought being friends was the same thing as enjoying each others company and spending time together. In addition, either a relationship or a friends with benefits situation can be monogamous or polyamorous so I don't see why the number of people involved in that sense would matter.
Am I the only one a little confused here? If you are friends with someone and get romantic with them, how (or why) are you not just dating? Is friends with benefits just a label for people who are acquaintances (friends lite), who get horney and/or drunk and hook-up to absolve themselves of any emotional or personal responsibility?
I am obviously not somebody who is into casual encounters, and people's personal decisions are their own business, but I am awfully curious how about people reconcile what appears to be this discrepancy. I am guessing everyone defines these things a little differently, but maybe not. I really am clueless on this one, maybe its because I'm an Aspie (and INTJ) so have the emotional sophistication of an 8 year old. Nonetheless, I was hoping for a logical explanation of this.
thanks