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I live! :)

I've just been coasting along. I've been lifting but no cardio. I hit 90kg for 5 reps on bench two days ago. My all time record on bench.

I think I might be depressed... properly depressed.

Someone gave me this to fill out.




I need to get to a psychologist, but I can barely get out of bed.

As to fitness and aesthetics, I think I've gained a few kilos. Last two weeks I've been smashing back liters and liters of ice cream. It's been pretty crazy. All due to just being so dead inside.

Either way, time to get back on the aesthetics journey. Exercise and progress really improves my mood. And no one loves a fatty. Better to be depressed and attractive.

Until next time! :D
ok so a) I'm glad you survived 2017, b) once again I wish I could say something comforting or inspiring but I'm kind of depressed myself too and wouldn't be much help. I'm even worried to fill out the chart myself because today was not a particularly good day.

I do know for a fact that some people love some extra padding on their partner though. not just muscles but padding too. I know because I am one of those people :p and if there's one then there are surely others too...I don't think I'm a special snowflake on that topic.
 

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Discussion Starter #442
I went back to the gym on Tuesday.

I did 3 exercises, 3 sets, and 20 minutes of cardio. I lifted pretty light. I wanted my first session back to be easy.

Feels good to be back.

Then I went yesterday for mainly cardio, and core (3 sets: planks to failure, ab crunch machine) and smaller muscle isolations (3 sets each of: calves, delts, triceps)
 

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I went back to the gym on Tuesday.

I did 3 exercises, 3 sets, and 20 minutes of cardio. I lifted pretty light. I wanted my first session back to be easy.

Feels good to be back.

Then I went yesterday for mainly cardio, and core (3 sets: planks to failure, ab crunch machine) and smaller muscle isolations (3 sets each of: calves, delts, triceps)
Yay!
 

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Discussion Starter #445
I'm nostalgic for when I was making daily progress towards an ambitious level of aesthetics, when I was getting slimmer and slimmer by the day, stronger and stronger.

I also just felt more comfortable in my body. I felt healthier. It made me want to do other things.

I feel it's a great foundation for all other endeavours. To take pride in your health and appearance, to have that part of your life covered, it's really motivating for everything else in life. And it's an achievement no one can be handed. Everyone has to work for it the same. And it's an achievement open to anyone. And it's something that is basically universally accepted and appreciated.

I really loved Pietro Boselli's description of the point of his fitness endeavours.

This part:

Before, the achievement was measured in distance covered, altitude, time taken, and the endorphins were reinforcing the quintessential righteousness of the purpose.

Now, the joy and beauty radiating from an healthy and strong body became something that accompanied me wherever I went, and was universally accepted. Not everyone relates to a 14-hour high altitude trail running event, but everyone relates to the proportions of a classic physique. And this is simply because it is a more complete statement of balance between endurance and strength. Suddenly I understood the importance that classical art and philosophy attributed to symmetry, proportion and completeness, and how physical wellbeing related very strictly to intellectual brilliance and even to morality.
- Pietro Boselli

Source: https://www.pietroboselli.com/fitness-bio/
 

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I'm nostalgic for when I was making daily progress towards an ambitious level of aesthetics, when I was getting slimmer and slimmer by the day, stronger and stronger.

I also just felt more comfortable in my body. I felt healthier. It made me want to do other things.

I feel it's a great foundation for all other endeavours. To take pride in your health and appearance, to have that part of your life covered, it's really motivating for everything else in life. And it's an achievement no one can be handed. Everyone has to work for it the same. And it's an achievement open to anyone. And it's something that is basically universally accepted and appreciated.

I really loved Pietro Boselli's description of the point of his fitness endeavours.

This part:

- Pietro Boselli

Source: https://www.pietroboselli.com/fitness-bio/
Improvement is fun. Maintaining it is the hard part.
 

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I went back to the gym on Tuesday.

I did 3 exercises, 3 sets, and 20 minutes of cardio. I lifted pretty light. I wanted my first session back to be easy.

Feels good to be back.

Then I went yesterday for mainly cardio, and core (3 sets: planks to failure, ab crunch machine) and smaller muscle isolations (3 sets each of: calves, delts, triceps)
>I did cardio
You mean you skipped rest breaks between lift sessions and went to failure with proper form every set? Cardio causes low T by increasing cortisol, which in turn makes you fat. Doing legs or back > than cardio, burns more fat. Gains are made by depleting the chemical energy in your muscles... means going beyond into failure, means you cant lift another rep, its also best way of burning fat.
 

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BMI doesn't discriminate weight from muscles vs weight from fat. It only measures your overall weight for a male of you height. PS. you looked fine the way you were too.
 

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Discussion Starter #450
Hello, those of you who remember me. I thought I'd do a little update.

I went through a rocky part in my life but I didn't gain weight. I actually got down to 88kg. I didn't have a gym membership for the 3 months, so I lost a fair bit of strength, but I was lifting at home with dumbbells, so didn't really lose much mass. I've been back into it, and the strength is coming back quickly.

I'm currently around 90kg. I'm now trying to get down to 80kg (or however low is necessary to be ripped). I think this is the final stretch from having chub to being properly lean. My eating habits are now fairly consistently sane without thinking about it. People who meet me for the first time spontaneously describe me as 'skinny'. This blows my mind, but hey, I guess in clothes I look skinny because I'm 6'3. For example, the other night, I was out at a quiz night, and a girl I had just met that night offered me a chip, and I said no, and she said, "is that why you are so skinny?"

I nearly fell on the floor.

Furthermore, it's also nice to be technically within the healthy BMI range for my height. Just within. As people have pointed out, it doesn't take into consideration muscle mass, but be that as it may, it's nice to know I'm almost certainly now within a healthy weight range.

The other day, someone came up to me in the gym and asked me how much I shoulder press. I was confused at first, but then I thought, "ok maybe this guy thinks I have decent shoulder development." That makes me happy because I have been trying to hard to grow my shoulders. I really don't want to have big arms without the right shoulder size. That looks really silly to me. I see it often in the gym.

I had a long 'diet break' where I was just maintaining around this weight. In the last week, I've plunged back into a strong caloric deficit and a lot of cardio.

When it comes romance, I've just basically been celibate for the last year, and I don't really know what to do about that. I suppose I need to start aggressively harassing random women like players do, lol, but I still have low confidence in myself. When I'm properly lean, I hope my confidence will have improved enough that I can be more up myself.

Here is a silly update photo that my friend took of me, under the good gym lighting. I don't look that different but there's some progress visible.

 

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@Sylarz, it's ok to pause the efforts due to anything for a few weeks at least. Managing to come back is a massive sign your mental health is good. Use this feel of come back to keep up. You look good!
 
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