Personality Cafe banner
1 - 11 of 11 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
930 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I am having trouble finding a job. I need a job that is meaningful -- something that I am passionate about -- something that I can go to work everyday and know that I am making the world a better place. The best job I ever had was in college where I worked as a literacy tutor, teaching struggling urban youth how to read. It was minimum wage and the most rewarding thing ever. Now that I have discovered what my purpose is in life, I can't force myself to take a job I don't love. But I desperately need money. I have tried going on interviews to places like grocery stores, restaurants, etc. and they all turned me down. I am sure they can sense that I don't really want the job. I just wish it were easier to do what I love and make a ton of money doing it!
 

·
SAY MY NAME
INTJ
Joined
·
8,476 Posts
I can understand how you feel, I've had like two weeks of work since 2013. It's an ugly situation. Especially because it's just sickening to search for jobs, ad after ad after ad of utterly unappealing and tedious shit. The turf with your friends is the place to be, not stuck doing some pointless, unfulfilling job. I want work, as in something constructive, something I can develop.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
501 Posts
I just posted about this in the venting tread! It is annoying not to have a job, but I try to remain positive... I virtually try anything to work anywhere - but I also get turned down a lot, even for jobs that are really below my standards or my education level. I get that indeed employers sense that you do not really want these jobs.

As for now I try to 'get in' in creative ways. I have set up my own company in coaching and training with my ENFP friend - for now this does not deliver me any work YET, but I am positive that, as I put more and more effort in it by networking, marketing and finding suitable clients, this will be profitable.
I also try to find (small) companies that I like and introduce myself and my qualities - maybe they can put my skills to use. In the future I'd like to write for companies on freelance basis, as I know I can do that well and easily.
Also I have put myself online on a website where you can find yourself a housekeeper. For the time being, that is pretty easy money.

What else do you like? Maybe you can work in your favorite pub? Or in the zoo.. Or work in an unconstructive very stupid job (pretend that you are super motivated ;)) and also do something for yourself alongside..?

All the best to you guys!

Edit: oh it helps to have someone to vent about it from time to time... And someone who can kick your ass towards being employed again - like a coach you can chat with weekly.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,208 Posts
TPoPA = The Problem of the Puer Aeternus by Marie-Louise von Franz

I remember (Jung) saying once to a puer aeternus type, “It does not matter what job you take. The point is that for once you do something thoroughly and conscientiously, whatever it is.” This man insisted that if only he could find the right thing, then he would work, but that he could not find it. Jung’s answer was, “Never mind, just take the next bit of earth you can find. Plow it and plant something in it. No matter whether it is business, or teaching, or anything else, give yourself for once to that field which is ahead of you.” TPoPA 153​

Everybody has a field of reality to work in if he wants to. The childish trick of saying, “I would work if it were the right thing,” is one of the many self-delusions of the puer aeternus by which he stays within the mother realm and his megalomanic identification with the gods – who as you know do not work. TPoPA 153​

Except for Hephaestus, who was despised by all the other, there are no working gods in Greek mythology. Fields would also imply limitation. That is the drawback of getting in touch with reality, because in that way one becomes limited, there are restrictions. One comes to the miserable human situation where ones hands are tied and it is not possible to do as one would like, something particularly disagreeable to the puer aeternus. In your work you come up against your own limitations, both intellectual and physical, for what one produces is always miserable compared with the fantasies one had lying in bed about what one would do, if one could! The fantasy is far more beautiful than the real product! TPoPA 153​

In Symbols of Transformation Jung spoke of one cure – work – and having said that he hesitated for a minute and thought, “Is it really as simple as all that? Is that just the one cure? Can I put it that way?” But work is the one disagreeable word which no puer aeternus likes to hear, and Jung came to the conclusion that it was the right answer. My experience also has been that if a man pulls out of this kind of youthful neurosis, then it is through work.

There are, however, some misunderstandings in this connection, for the puer aeternus can work, as can all primitives or people with a weak ego complex, when fascinated or in a state of great enthusiasm. Then he can work twenty-four hours at a stretch or even longer, until he breaks down, but what he cannot do is to work on a dreary, rainy morning when work is boring and one has to kick oneself into it; that is the one thing the puer aeternus usually cannot manage and will use any kind of excuse to avoid. And analysis of a puer aeternus sooner or later always comes up against this problem, and it is only when the ego has become sufficiently strengthened that the problem can be overcome and there is the possibility of sticking to the work.

As far as I have seen, the unconscious generally tries to produce a compromise, namely, to indicate the direction in which there might be some enthusiasm or where the psychological energy would flow naturally, for it is of course easier to train oneself to work in a direction supported by one’s instinct. That is not quite so hard as working completely uphill in opposition to your own flow of energy. Therefore it is usually advisable to wait a while and find out where the natural flow of interest and energy lies and then try to get the man to work there. But in every field of work there always come the time when routine must be faced. All work, even creative, contains a certain amount of boring routine, and that is where the puer aeternus escapes and comes to the conclusion that “this is not it!” In such moments, if one is supported by the unconscious, there are generally dreams which show that one should push on through the obstacle and if that succeeds then the battle is won. TPoPA – 11​

The Puer Aeternus Archetype
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
225 Posts
this world sadly often works in this way: either you do something you love and have fun with and do not earn really much or...well you decide to just work for the money...
a job kind of always is as fullfilling as you want it to be. In a grocery store you may not be able to change the world but you can change one persons day. You can greet people friendly, help them find stuff...you can keep things in order andandand. the same goes for serving in restaurants and many more. You can make someones day with a warm greeting. Maybe they had a horrible day and all they need is someone friendly. You can always make a change, if you BE the change. I do not advice you to lower your standards but to maybe change your attitude towards some jobs. Think about what you could do different doing a lame job... what you can learn from this job and focus on the positives sides :)
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,530 Posts
I strongly second @Niqesse's POV because this was exactly how I finally was able to feel ok doing what I do for a living.

For years I found it stifling and soul draining. I had to go through a lot of soul searching to redefine my attitude. Now I don't mind the bureaucracy and favoritism but concentrate on my personal fulfillment (benefit time and retirement planning) and contribution (to help taxpayers, my true boss).

Most jobs you can find meaning. I waited tables for 10 years since college to support myself. One day when I retire from my full time job I'd love to wait tables again in a diner type of eatery (like Lavern and Shirley). If my kindness and words could cheer up one customer, it'd make my day.

I think for ppl with strong Fe, being able to touch ppl is what we love. I feel good when a taxpayer tells me how much I've helped him/her. It's what my job is all about. You can find jobs that will give you the same, jobs that allow you human contact.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,052 Posts
It’s nice if you have the luxury to turn down jobs that aren’t perfect as far as giving you meaning and enjoyment, many of us do not. The way the job market is, I suggest taking whatever you can get and being picky to search while you are working.
Second I’d like to suggest career books. My library has more each week, and many are excellent and helpful. They go much deeper than anything I’ve found on the internet. Another great resource for me was my state’s Department of Labor site (USA). They even have a section where you can explore jobs. There is an ‘employment training and services’ section where jobseekers can explore many different careers, as well as see what is available for state-funded training.

 

·
Registered
Joined
·
930 Posts
Discussion Starter · #8 ·
Yes one of my favorite authors Seth Godin has a quote "Transferring your passion to your job is far easier than finding a job that happens to match your passion" and that echoes what @Niqesse said. I have been getting by on odds and ends jobs by finding the good in them. I do a lot of freelancing. I work as a freelance reporter, I am very good at writing, but it's not the writing I like, what I like is helping people -- it's a business journal and we highlight startup companies in our small city, so I get to go out and talk to people, ask what they are doing, their ideas, how they are helping boost the local economy. I love connecting with people. And they like the free publicity. Plus whenever I write articles about restaurants they always give me free food ;)

But I have dreams of grandeur that can't be repressed. I am currently working on how to solve poverty in America... working on how to give excellent education to all children, regardless on their zip code... I want to network with people to get my word out... I want to give TED talks...

And I can't do this being chained to a 9 to 5 job! :p
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
225 Posts
But I have dreams of grandeur that can't be repressed. I am currently working on how to solve poverty in America... working on how to give excellent education to all children, regardless on their zip code... I want to network with people to get my word out... I want to give TED talks...

And I can't do this being chained to a 9 to 5 job! :p
Well success is not something that will simply pass by, say hello and stay forever. It is hard work. It does not come with a new job, or a new surrounding. :) There is no 'can't do because of this and that'. Your goal: improving education in america (I guess?^^) how to achieve it: with little steps. Get to know teachers, and students. Build up a network, present them your idea. What job are you searching for? How are you going to achieve it? What are possible ways to achieve it? Success is about being creative and passionate. Going new ways. It is about failing, falling and standing up again. Learning and growing. Never though I actually would take him as an example...but Steve Jobs did not have an easy start and same story with many others.
So what are you waiting for? :p 9-5....don't make me jealous with my 7-6 job xD
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
417 Posts
It seems we are one in the same, @lizw47!

I've gone through the same processes over and over again. I've had plenty of retail jobs I have walked out of on the spot after a few months. I've had jobs in construction, at a museum as a general manager, as a freelance writer, in administration, as a sports coach, as a teacher-- and all them were not quite right. But we're INFJ, and we don't fit into ANYTHING easily, do we? ;)

I truly believe we have to look at this the other way around. Instead of finding a pre-created job or career, we should create our own. Now obviously, I'm making this sound a million times easier said than done, but I think we have an obligation to take our vision and follow it with fury, ambition and an open mind. I think anything less than having a career where I can do what I love by using my strengths, skills and passion to provide great value to other people and receive ample value in return is unacceptable to me. I'm an IDEALIST after all!

So, I would say- dreams of grandeur? F*CK YES. Absolutely, yes. Paint a mural of all the things you want your life to consist of, all the things you want to be. Make a vision board. Write an objective plan and change it every week if you need to. You CAN'T FAIL if you DON'T QUIT. Make your entire life an expression of who you are and what you love. If you focus on generating as much value for others as possible, you will find a way to make money from it. Spend your entire life in pursuit of your dreams, because the truth it- there is nothing better.

Be relentless, passionate and have the courage to face failure again and again and you will live the life you've dreamed of.
For now, find as many ways as possible to move forward. I'm going to start writing articles for INFJs (INFJammer - Success and Happiness for the Creative INFJ) and focus as best I can on providing value to others. I have many other creative interests I'm following as well, but I'm making sure my focus is solid, meaning one thing at a time, in order to grow.

Do the same! Pick one for now and have at it full force. To support yourself in the meantime, get a job as close to enjoyable as you can. And if you can't do it, don't. Seriously. It's all about priorities. People laugh at me about this all the time, but it's really just a choice. At the moment, I'm CHOOSING. I'm going to a job I don't enjoy but where I have plenty of time to do things like this- write. :) If I didn't want to, I would simply be choosing to have little to no money, eating ramen, possibly living back at home or on the streets. It's a choice. I'm making my own priorities. Not one is better than the other. It's all up to you. If you would rather couch surf and paste the best stories you've ever written on public bathroom walls, I will still respect and admire that. There are many that disagree with me and I fully accept that. I'm a nutjob, but I'm a proud one. :)

My best advice is get up early and do what you love first thing. Make getting up in the morning all about you and what you love. You'll be productive and set the tone for the day.
I also want to give TEDTalks, and I know I have to work my ass off and find success on my own terms first. You can do it. No one else seems to understand or believe in us, but wholeheartedly, I do.

Cheers!,
Stef
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,402 Posts
But we're INFJ, and we don't fit into ANYTHING easily, do we? ;)
For me, this really is the crux of the matter. I don't think there's any job type that is absolutely perfect for INFJs. I worked for 8 years as a clinical microbiologist. I got to use my Ti lots but felt the creative side of me didn't have an outlet. I then studied clinical psychology and spent a year in a PsyD program, only to discover that the profession is really uptight. It didn't involve the pleasant Jungian therapy or Carl Rogers approach that makes the work seem appealing. It was, instead, a glimpse into a profession that's fighting to position itself favorably in the light of changing healthcare reimbursement models with an emphasis on short-term practical therapeutic approaches that conform to people's insurance plans. In addition, the number of internships available are much smaller than the number of students applying to them. Some students go through 4 years of a program accquiring ever more loan debt only to discover that they can't get an internship and therefore won't be awarded a doctoral degree after all of that hard work. Being an older student, I saw clearly that I would be in an unfavorable internship match position due to ageism even in a field that should probably value life experience. Now, I'm in a MFA studio art program. My creative side is very much fulfilled but the "wanting to do something for others" side isn't. My Ti isn't exactly being super stimulated, either. So, following my interests and trying to get a good INFJ type career match hasn't been 100% successful. What is the answer? Perhaps, it's contained in Cal Newport's book, "So Good They Can't Ignore You: Why Skills Trump Passion in the Quest for Work You Love". He maintains that the happiest people are those who acquire unique and highly desirable skills. They get the most interesting jobs and years of experience in an area is correlated with career satisfaction. People who are highly skilled at something are confident and enjoy the work. I think he has a point. I find that the artist-professors I've had who are great teachers, highly skilled artists and have been doing it all for so long it comes easily to them seem to be the happiest.
 
1 - 11 of 11 Posts
Top