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Help! depressed/confused ESTP?

2431 Views 11 Replies 6 Participants Last post by  GreenCoyote
SO, there's this guy, and my friend and I are pretty sure he's an ESTP. He's close with my friend (INFJ), and he has this girlfriend (IDKW- "I don't know what" but she's the perfect definition of "evil bitch" :p).

Problem is, he seems really messed up, and I'd really like some input on the matter >< of course I would relay the message to my infj friend cause she's closer to him.

He started dating this girl last year, and he reasons were: she's hot, and it's for fun. By now he's really extremely infatuated with her. However, he knows that the relationship is unhealthy, and he knows some shady things about her. He knows that she's gone really far physically with other guys, cheated on many of her previous boyfriends, and that she was going to call him out last year and dump him in front of all her friends (she's the type who dates boy after boy for a sense of security). And he acts like he doesn't care. But now, he seems to be getting almost depressed. His grades suck (he used to be obsessed with good marks), he has few friends... And the more he realizes that this is an unhealthy relationship, the more he seems to cling to it. But he's a really talented guy and I think he could really flourish if this girl wasn't dragging him down.

I hardly even know what I'm asking, but can anyone give me any insight on this? And is there any way my friend could help him realize what's happening here? He really respects her and she's one of the only people he occasionally opens up to.
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this made me laugh XD

My Fe is through the roof, and I am telling you right now I would just slap the bitch for making him feel so shitty.

but I can't do that because everyone else in the room would just freak THE fuck out. lol
I would say if the INFJ isn't worried. you are probablly in good shape.
oh, the INFJ is very much worried :p

hey... question.
so... do you like him?
no. we used to have a thing, but I'm long over it. I know, I know, the fact that we used to be interested in each other might make it seem like I'm trying to ruin for him out of jealousy, but I'm really not. Admittedly, I don't like her, but the main reason is I'm just angry that he's wasting his talents and abilities all for this girl who brings out the worst in him. Plus, it matters a lot to my friend so it matters to me.
see, we thought that he'd just move on to another girl after a while, but he's just sinking further into this relationship. his initial reason for getting with her WAS because it was "for fun". Now it's like he holds onto this relationship for dear life, showering her with attention, even though he's admitted that the situation is unhealthy

Giving advice is hard to do especially when you don't even know his true type. If he is an ESTP he will work it out on his own. We can put ourselves through quite a bit of abuse when we love someone but we eventually come out of it dump them.

One thing you can't do is make an ESTP do anything. You can plant an idea in his head but he will need to feel like he came up with the decision on his own.
actually, the more I'm hearing on this thread, the more convinced I am that he is an ESTP... but there's definitely always the possibility that I've misjudged. Yeah, I had the feeling that ESTPs couldn't really be told what to do...
And by the way, TreeBob. I must say that you simply amaze me :p

Inception would have to be my movie of the year :)
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