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Discussion Starter #1
So I have a friend who we thought is ESFP but we're not sure about it, she might be ESFJ. I'd be glad if I would get some help even tho this doesn't play a big part in our lives.


Here's a list of good and bad things about her:

- She also likes to plan her future and make lists about things.

- She lends money if you're struggling financially.

- She's creative and likes to finish her tasks.

- She's always on time.

- She has her own opinions in clothing, movies and music, otherwise not in for example games.

- She's outgoing.

- She's a neat freak.

- She is quite picky and wants everything to be in one specific way or order.

- She used to do sports and work out a lot, but stopped 3 years ago for an unknown reason.

- She likes to talk about herself a lot, she could do it for hours.

- She likes making other people laugh but her jokes are usually name calling and stuff like that, people can get offended by her jokes. She doesn't like when people makes jokes about her or her way of doing stuff.

- She likes the idea of being popular, so she befriends a lot of people in short amount of time. She thinks you're a friend if she has just spoken to you once. She values new friends more than her 'old' friends.

- She doesn't like to skip school but if she's in a fight with someone she would skip school or avoid the person for example, if they're in the same class she would move to another room.

- She avoids conflicts and doesn't want to work them out, also she has a hard time to accept her mistakes.

- She's a manipulator.

- She use advantage of other people so she can reach her own goals.

- She changes her likes/dislikes and style depending on the people she's with at the time, she also buys things others might like to her self. She bought a really expensive figure because all of her friends in the school likes the character. Also she bought a Legend of Zelda book even tho she never heard about it before, but she bought it just because most of us play the games.

- She doesn't care much about money and it's value.

- She also complains about her appearance for example, she had greasy hair a few days ago and we went to the mall and she complained about her hair all day long.

- She befriended a girl just to get to her brother, when they started to go out she abandoned the girl.

- She chooses school and careers depending on what other chooses.

- She might also tell lies about her and her family, for example that her mother abuses her even tho it's pretty sure that she doesn't.

- She avoids presentations/standing in front of the class, but she likes being in the center of attention. She ditched a group presentation in the last minute because she just didn't want to do it. She also doesn't want to read out loud if someones listening and doesn't like to write, and blames her dyslexia for it. She also blames her dyslexia for not doing presentations.

Little about her background:

She's adopted, and her family is quite wealthy. She usually gets what she wants. When she was little she wanted a little sister so they just went ahead and adopted another girl. Her adoptive parents has a biological child, who is the oldest, and they adopted because the oldest child wanted an adopted sister, or that's what she has told us.
She likes to design clothes and houses and interior. She's into sci-fi movies and likes movies mostly for the effects in them, she could care less about the story. She also likes to draw, she graduated from graphic design school last year.

FYI my native language isn't English so if there's some grammatical errors, then I'm sorry.
 

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Discussion Starter #3
ESFJ for sure.
Yeah me and my friend thought that too but we weren't sure. I have another friend who is typed as an ESFJ but this friend and the one who I talked about earlier are nothing alike. So is there such a variation in every type that they almost could be opposite or totally different? Few things that they don't "share" and other things:

- If she has done something wrong or is in a fight with someone she would most likely say that she's sorry and try to work things out.
- She doesn't use people to reach her goals.
- She doesn't change her liking depending on the people she's with or careers or schools.
- If there's an assignment she dislikes she'd still do it because that's part of the education.
- She usually speaks her mind but doesn't do it harshly or in a bad way.
- Even tho she's outgoing she's a good listener and doesn't rant about herself for hours.
- She likes baking and cooking for friends and family. She'd like to study culinary.
- She likes video games, board games, movies and series.
- She likes to come up with stories for books/video games/series.
- She likes being with friends but now and then she likes to be alone.
- She's quite pessimistic and paranoid, even tho she doesn't show her paranoid side that much.
- She gives up easily and sometimes she's a bit aggressive.
- She cares about her appearance but not in the same way as the other friend, like if she has greasy hair she wouldn't complain about it all day long, she doesn't wear makeup and has a quirky style in clothing.
- Even tho she has dysphasia (hard time to understand certain words and speech), she doesn't let that get in the way of doing school assignments.
- Her humor doesn't involve hurting other people
- People have a hard time to understand when she's joking/sarcastic.
- She likes to tell and solve riddles.
- She get's mad/depressed if she isn't allowed to help someone.
 

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ENFJ too possible. Anway looks very Fe.

Second post is about a different friend? That one doesn't seem like ESFJ... ISFJ maybe? If you sure about Si. Possibly even "T" type. Enneagram type influences behavior a lot. My basic guess would be 3w2 for first one, 6w7 for second one.
 

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Discussion Starter #5
ENFJ too possible. Anway looks very Fe.


Second post is about a different friend? That one doesn't seem like ESFJ... ISFJ maybe? If you sure about Si. Possibly even "T" type. Enneagram type influences behavior a lot. My basic guess would be 3w2 for first one, 6w7 for second one.
We never thought about that the first friend could be an ENFJ, but after reading about them I'm sure she's an ESFJ. She's materialisfic, likes dancing and sports (and playing instruments)...
Yeah it's about a different friend. We're not sure about the Si but we're sure of the Fe. We have had problems knowing is she's introverted or extroverted and thinker or feeler.

thanks for the enneagram, we don't know a lot about enneagrams so we appreciate your help.
 

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We never thought about that the first friend could be an ENFJ, but after reading about them I'm sure she's an ESFJ. She's materialisfic, likes dancing and sports (and playing instruments)...
Yeah it's about a different friend. We're not sure about the Si but we're sure of the Fe. We have had problems knowing is she's introverted or extroverted and thinker or feeler.

thanks for the enneagram, we don't know a lot about enneagrams so we appreciate your help.
Well, both actual ENFJs I know are/were heavy into sports - professional dancing, tennis, aerobics. One is pianist & conductor. Also both are drawn to "glittery" and fairly show-off clothing.

[edit] many ESFJ vs ENFJ threads on this forum. You may want to check with those.
 
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