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1.What aspect of your personality made you unsure of your type?
The deeper I wander into MBTI, the more I feel foreign about myself. I catch little glimmers of myself that I never recognized before, sometimes hauntingly frightening ones. Over the past few years of delving into personality theory, it has felt so illuminating, and yet so puzzling at the same time. How vastly I have evolved since childhood and the little contradictions I notice constantly knotting my personality bewilders me. I keep feeling like, no matter how much I probe into the theory, I am shrouded in an enigma. For instance, as a child I was beaming with joy, far more happy go lucky than I am now, I wore my heart on my sleeve. I always battled an intense and enduring shyness but I still was so much more different than I am now. Even a few years ago my views, my desires, my longings in life were so different. It’s intriguing but also confusing. For instance, the question if I am truly an introvert keeps lingering inside. Even as a child, I felt estranged from my peers and felt comfortable with letting my mind dance to its own tune, I still loved to communicate and would ramble unceasingly about everything and anything at home. I have transformed so much, and while the notion of growth is beautiful it also blurs much of who I am. How much is who I came into this earth, and how much is who I have become? This confusion about time and how I have evolved is what clouds me the most of understanding my true type. I could be anything, really.


2. What do you yearn for in life? Why?
When I was a child, I used to feel so enchanted by the moon. I would look at it and feel a strange, childlike love, its magical white glow allured me. It was so far away and so pulling and I wanted to learn more about it. For me, I think that was always what I yearned for-the feeling of magic. Of exploring, chasing what I desired and what whispered to my heart. As a child, I would have raging obsessions about anything that seemed magical to me, that spellbound my mind. From the mystery of the moon to crystals to mythology, anything that caused my heart to ripple and chase. Perhaps I would have answered differently as a child, however-I would have craved fun, glimmers of joy, love, friendship, something to soothe my lonely self. However, now I just yearn for growth. To satisfy the tug in my heart, understand the beauty and complexity of the human mind, and conquer the monsters that keep pursuing me, breaking from my mental and emotional chains. I still feel the same, shimmering desire for the moon that I felt long ago-to feel the amazement of the world and from the world, but feels more ghostlike now, worn with time. For now, I seek growth and betterment, and through discovering myself, a sense of contentment that feels unattainable and far away, elusive.
3. Think about a time where you felt like you were at your finest. Tell us what made you feel that way.
I don’t know if there was ever a time that I felt true, unadulterated joy with myself. It seems every minute of who I was, of time is stained with my imperfection. I have never felt purely and wholly content with myself, but there are little glimmers of moments that I feel that I am truly on the way to growth. When I write, and surrender my heart to words and let them ignite with my desires and thoughts, I feel so full, liberated, inspired. There was also a time a few years ago where I felt truly good with myself. I had battled and grown through many of my quandaries, I had grown as a person, and I had begun to dip into the world of personality theory. I was exploring the crevices of myself without feeling overwhelmed, intellectually stimulated, discovering the beauty of life, and truly growing, without feeling barren, the way I do now. I also felt fully and truly connected with God and my faith, now so many barriers lie inside of me but before my mind and heart felt truly resplendent with love. I hadn’t begun to have identity crises the way I do now and I genuinely felt radiant and there was a certain innocence of those times. I loved learning in school, especially exploring literature, reading novels that provoked me, and falling captive to certain characters. I recognized the beauty of my mind without disdaining it. I went to a Renaissance fair with my choir and it was so fascinating, I loved the freedom and beauty and innocence of those times. I was young and old all at once and I feel I have crossed that barrier now, it feels so far away. I had also begun to make such genuinely inspiring and true friendships. That time in my life dazzled most with promise, I think.
4. What makes you feel inferior?
I have recently discovered and realized that throughout so much of my childhood, feelings of inferiority gripped me. If I witnessed something beautiful or magnificent that someone else created or said, I burned with an innate feeling of inferiority and envy. I especially feel inferior when belittled or convicted for my flaws. The moments when the words of others scar me and open my eyes to how wrong I have been, how much I hurt others, how terribly I hurt them, then I feel disgusted and ashamed and hopeless all at once. When others illuminate my monstrous side I feel so inferior and bathed in all my imperfection. I also tend to feel inferior when it comes to grades or reviews, constructive criticism. I have battled a fear of failure since childhood, constantly weighed by inadequacy. No idea or thought or feeling felt safe and I would veil so much in the classroom. I was afraid of imperfection, any number or comment that felt chastising to me would leave me feeling defeated.

5. What tends to weigh on your decisions? (Do you think about people, pro-cons, how you feel about it, etc.)
This is a difficult question to tackle because it depends on so many factors intertwined. At the heart of a decision, I usually make it if it aligns with my heart, if I feel a sense of satisfaction or inspiration inside, if it feels right. It often depends on my own personal feelings, but also I try to account for how others feel too. Sometimes I feel I may need to sacrifice an innate desire for something because it would be hurtful to others, or I look deeper into my motivations and realize that it stems from a place of darkness. I don’t tend to shift through all of the pros and cons, although the central ones do arise in my mind, and overall I glean which side of a potential decision is most potent and most rewarding. Sometimes I do make logically grounded decisions but they usually almost always involve my heart or the hearts of others.

6. When working on a project what is normally your emphasis? Do you like to have control of the outcome?
When working on a project I try to create one as comprehensive and true and capturing of what I am researching and what I want to convey, all the little glimmers and shades and angles essential to what is being researched and the central meanings. For instance, when I conducted a sleep project in middle school, I tried to capture, at the heart of my project, the key idea that sleep was miraculous and could heal. But also try to incorporate all the details and angles that illuminate that message. For more artistic or poetic endeavors I try to create an emotional message and pour myself into its core as best as I can. This, again, is difficult to answer because projects range vastly. Sometimes I conduct haphazard ones to intrigue me, others are for personal growth, others are more scientific and focused on bearing scientific truths whereas others elucidate emotional thoughts and personal messages. As for outcomes, I try to remain open-minded but if it still feels like there is room for improvement or if we could transform a project in some way, I like to be able to communicate with that, however, sometimes my shyness clouds me and leaves me terrified of communicating how I feel unless I am truly comfortable with my partners.

8. When you want to learn something new, what feels more natural for you? (Are you more prone to be hands on, to theorize, to memorize, etc) Memorizing is quite challenging for me, and while my mind can retain little glimmers of information that strike it, they often get lost in my mind as I have trouble with perfectly holding vast amounts of information in my mind. I prefer to wade through seas of information and take everything in, while internally learning about something and trying to glean the key ideas of a topic-I might carry little sparks of information that especially reinforce a concept, however. I am not particular hands-on as I struggle with creating buildings or diagrams, but highlighting and writing down does help me to centralize what I have learned.
9. How organized do you to think of yourself as?
As a child, I tended fall into a whirlwind of organizing my entire room and it almost immediately dissolved into a tundra. I struggle with organization and am not naturally clean, and I used to embrace that as beautiful, as I found it less constricting and more creatively releasing. But lately, I have begun to become more organized, discovering habits that allow me to remain on track and guide me. For instance, my planner was a saving grace during the school year as it allowed me to list and keep everything contained, without getting lost in all of the due dates. Even though I have begun to grow far more cleaner, however, at heart I believe that I am not naturally bound to cleanliness, I would rather not devote so much time to something that feels meaningless and grueling to me (even though healing can sometimes also feel very cathartic and rewarding, inspiring me to begin a new chapter, self-reflect or feeling inspired to transform my life).
10. How do you judge new ideas? You try to understand the principles behind it to see if they make sense or do you look for information that supports it? When I judge new ideas, I try not to remain narrow-minded and recognize its beauty (especially because as a child I would often fall into a narrow-minded, black and white scope), and try to see if I agree with it and how it ties into what I have learned and how I feel. I don’t necessarily always feel the need to probe further and find specific data to corroborate it, and I am not very factually-oriented unless it very much provokes me and I want to learn more about where it derives from. If the basic idea seems feasible to me or even just seems to hold potential, or something that I feel could improve our world and its growth, then I accept it, although I may not truly adopt it unless it fires me inside.

11.You find harmony by making sure everyone is doing fine and belonging to a given group or by making sure that you follow what you believe and being yourself?
I feel torn between both. In a group I try to follow and remain true to what shimmers in my heart, what feels right, anything that makes me internally clamor or feels a sense of discord, I try to distance myself from. However, in middle school, I so often fell into the trap of sacrificing myself and becoming tangled in drama and gossip and shutting who I was into darkness. I would always feel uncomfortable with releasing myself and felt the need to shroud myself because it felt so unsafe. In a group, if I see anyone feeling estranged or hurt, I try to make sure that they feel comfortable and included, although I was often quite blind and insensitive to that when I was younger. So I feel like I try to dip my toes into both worlds, make sure that everybody feels nurtured and truly safe in a group but also following my own heart and not letting darkness ensnare me.

12. Are you the kind that thinks before speaking or do you speak before thinking? Do you prefer one-on-one communication or group discussions?
Although sometimes my tongue does slip and create swordlike statements that could hurt others without realizing it, I genuinely prefer to let my thoughts drift inside before I speak. Especially due to my social anxiety, I feel uncomfortable with truly releasing my thoughts unless they feel well-developed or truly illuminating. I prefer one-on-one communication far, far more because groups feel so imprisoning. My voice feels constantly shattered and invisible in group conversations, and overall, they feel overwhelming. But in personal conversations, the barriers fall and everything feels so much more comforting, liberating. Sometimes I do treasure group conversations, however, especially my groups from childhood because it feels so much more whole that way. Together we all hold a special bond, strengthened by time that strings us. I loved sitting in my childhood groups and sharing secrets and pondering about ghost stories, and we all had our own unique voice and it was beautiful to witness all of us melding together. So I prefer personal conversations, unless they are intimate, small groups that I cherish.

13.Do you jump into action right away or do you like to know where are you jumping before leaping? Does action speaks more than words?
It depends. Sometimes I feel spontaneous desires glittering at my heartstrings and I feel so excited or inspired by a new project that I eagerly leap into it, but most of the time I like to know where I am leaping into, have an idea inside or feel comfortable with what I am pursuing. For instance, as a child I felt deeply traumatized by rollercoasters and would avoid them vehemently, lunging into anything that made me feel threatened or uncomfortable, I would fervently avoid. However, I also sometimes want to begin a new project quickly or feel propelled to write something, trim a little of my hair, but I need to generally feel comfortable with something before lunging into it. It’s also challenging for me to answer whether I believe actions or words more valuable to me. As a writer, words simmer with the deepest secrets that I harbor and capture all the feelings and thoughts that glint inside of me. Although I may act one way in public my words could reveal an entirely different story, and I truly believe that language can shine a light on one’s innermost self in a way that actions cannot. However, it can also prove the inverse-if someone has a silver tongue they still might, although bewitching others with their words, hurt others irrevocably through their actions, illuminating who they truly are. So I think it depends on the individual. Some hide through their actions, others through words. For me personally, words are the mirrors of my innermost self, to others they may blind others from who they are at heart.

14.It's Saturday. You're at home, and your favorite show is about to start. Your friends call you for a night out. What will you do? It depends. If I feel such an insatiable desire to watch the show and it truly captivates me and refreshes me, then I would probably sacrifice time with friends for watching the show. However, if I can record the show and watch it later, and if the time with friends will be precious and intimate and if we haven’t spent much time with each other, I would probably sacrifice the show. It’s difficult to answer because I feel socially devoid lately, and my friendships have been withering. I spend most of my days alone, and while I find it refreshing, I would also probably desire to spend more time with friends (despite the harrowing anxiety) than usual because I feel so depleted.
15.How do you act when you're stressed out? I suppose it depends-outside of the house I often remain veiled in my solitude, bottling my stress and letting myself drown in my thoughts without vocalizing or expressing how I truly feel. However, at home, I might explode, my emotions erupting inside of me and turning me into a monster. When stressed at home I either dissolve into my emotions or let anger fuel me, and I become lost in my negative emotion. Other times I remain far calmer and try to look towards my inner light and derive a sense of hope, without letting my turmoil destroy me. So it depends on how much the stress corrodes me inside and the extent of my agony. If there are glimmers of hope I try to allow them to guide me and lead me to a sense of growth without letting my darkness and fear overcome me, but if I feel an overriding sense of hopelessness I often combust.

16. What makes you dislike the personalities of some people? A sheer lack of compassion and sensitivity absolutely disgusts me. When people belittle others intentionally or attack others for what they feel or believe, or act belligerent, I feel repelled. I try to seek out inspiring, true people that I feel comfortable with. Anybody that tries to lower me or make me feel less than while verbally sparring at or taunting me makes me dislike a person. I also despise when my voice feels trampled on by others. Although I don’t try to dominate the conversation, in the depths I desire to feel heard and valued and understood, and when others either belittle me, taunt my way of thinking or ignore me, only using my friendship without truly desiring to learn about me as a person, it especially hurts. Otherwise, I try to embrace a rainbow of personalities and recognize the beauty that glimmers from each person’s mind, although too energized and loud people can overwhelm me, although I appreciate that they can pull me out of my shell.

17. Is there anything you really like talking about with other people?
I love forging sacred and beautiful connections with others, where we can share memories or a special bond inside or recognize shades of ourselves in each other. I love sharing my stories with people and speaking about what intrigues me, from interesting movies or topics or experiences that I cherish, or learning more about the way they think and feel. I love when we can probe into the depths of who we are, into childhood, and learn from each other. I love speaking about books and how they grip me and stories that I love. With those that I am especially close with I love exploring grander topics, like the origins of the universe and glimmers of lessons they have taken in over time or interesting phenomena.

18. What kind of things do pay the least attention to in your life? I don’t feel naturally inclined to learn about the practical realities and responsibilities of life. In my heart, I tend to shut out the news and turmoil of the outer world because it feels so painful and frightening. I like to flood away into my own realm of comfort, what I find beautiful and intriguing. I don’t like confronting the harsh truths of the world, like discrimination and injustice, because it hurts so much. It feels so vast, too vast to handle and I feel an inward sense of menace because I feel I am not doing enough to shape the world into a better place. I also don’t pay much attention to my wellbeing or practicalities such as eating healthy, remaining efficient, thinking about the responsibilities chained to the future because it steals from my sense of hope and inspiration. Too many nuances feel overwhelming at once, and the dark and looming responsibilities sometimes seem so daunting to me, and I inwardly repress them because I don’t feel naturally gravitated towards paying attention to them.
19. How do your friends perceive you? What is wrong about their perception? ? What would your friends never say about your personality ? I feel that many people, even my friends perceive me as dull and empty. They don’t recognize the beauty and complexity of my mind and all the secrets that I hold. Sometimes I feel they shut out and don’t recognize that I have a voice to share, because I veil it inside. They might perceive me as innocent and overly-rule following while they do not know the contradicting thoughts flooding through my head, and fail to recognize my inner light. They would probably never describe me as bold and confident, and in that aspect, they would be right because I am constantly splintered by fear and insecurity. I also struggle to be open about my thoughts and sugar-coat them, or repress them often, even my deepest opinions (even though I have periods where I desire to communicate about them).

20. You got a whole day to do whatever you like. What kind of activities do you feel like doing?
Ooh, this sounds intriguing. I would probably feel inclined to drown in a little literature, reading books that I cherish or ones that I have meant to read for the longest time but never had the willpower to begin. Perhaps I would stroll into a little, enchanted bookstore and look for novels that fascinate me, and sink into books there. I would probably spend most of my time watching my favorite movies or shows, either old ones that I love, or new ones with premises that magnetize me. I would probably sit in bed and feel inclined to eat my favorite Chinese food while spending time reflecting on my life and who I have become, and begin writing the novel that I have always wanted to write. And then...maybe just look into the stars with my dog. And watch one of the most beautiful movies that I have ever watched, Mermaids, because I feel an insatiable longing inside for a time I never knew and I treasure it very, very much. And into the night, spending time with the stories that I appreciate most and spending a day intense and comforting at the same time (perhaps watching conspiracy theory or true crime videos on YouTube as they mesmerize me). Something fulfilling and yet satisfying, settling at once. I also follow a film channel that I haven’t watched in the longest time, but it made school-like films that I loved to watch, perhaps I would rediscover it and watch its newest videos because I haven’t in the longest time.
 

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Discussion Starter #2 (Edited)
I'm now beginning to feel even more confused about my personality. I keep noticing glimmers of different functions arise in my memory and I generally feel so detached from myself. A constantly evolving person. Beneath the layers of time and growth, I want to discover who I really am, but it feels so clouding and confusing. I searched for the longest time and still feel unsure about who I really am. So any input would be interesting at all. I just feel extremely lost and severed from myself. Only these words are the final posts of who I am, despite my ever-changing mind, they glimmer with my eternal being.

I'm also terrified that all of this, this seeking and wandering and hoping to discover myself derives from a desire to create a beautiful image for myself, of who I want to become. But that's not true. I want to tap into the secrets of my mind and unlock all that I am, and come to learn more about myself. To bathe in the mystery of who I am.
 

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1.What aspect of your personality made you unsure of your type?
The deeper I wander into MBTI, the more I feel foreign about myself. I catch little glimmers of myself that I never recognized before, sometimes hauntingly frightening ones. Over the past few years of delving into personality theory, it has felt so illuminating, and yet so puzzling at the same time. How vastly I have evolved since childhood and the little contradictions I notice constantly knotting my personality bewilders me. I keep feeling like, no matter how much I probe into the theory, I am shrouded in an enigma. For instance, as a child I was beaming with joy, far more happy go lucky than I am now, I wore my heart on my sleeve. I always battled an intense and enduring shyness but I still was so much more different than I am now. Even a few years ago my views, my desires, my longings in life were so different. It’s intriguing but also confusing. For instance, the question if I am truly an introvert keeps lingering inside. Even as a child, I felt estranged from my peers and felt comfortable with letting my mind dance to its own tune, I still loved to communicate and would ramble unceasingly about everything and anything at home. I have transformed so much, and while the notion of growth is beautiful it also blurs much of who I am. How much is who I came into this earth, and how much is who I have become? This confusion about time and how I have evolved is what clouds me the most of understanding my true type. I could be anything, really.
Introvert is defined as putting energy inwards as opposed to putting it outwards. There are introverted and extraverted functions and if your lead one is an introverted one then you are an I. Some are more sociable and some a more likely to be shut ins. Some E types are very assertive and some are more passive. ENTP is known to be more introverted, conventionally speaking, even though it is an E. Just follow the definitions for this and try to avoid connotations of the words used.


2. What do you yearn for in life? Why?
When I was a child, I used to feel so enchanted by the moon. I would look at it and feel a strange, childlike love, its magical white glow allured me. It was so far away and so pulling and I wanted to learn more about it. For me, I think that was always what I yearned for-the feeling of magic. Of exploring, chasing what I desired and what whispered to my heart. As a child, I would have raging obsessions about anything that seemed magical to me, that spellbound my mind. From the mystery of the moon to crystals to mythology, anything that caused my heart to ripple and chase. Perhaps I would have answered differently as a child, however-I would have craved fun, glimmers of joy, love, friendship, something to soothe my lonely self. However, now I just yearn for growth. To satisfy the tug in my heart, understand the beauty and complexity of the human mind, and conquer the monsters that keep pursuing me, breaking from my mental and emotional chains. I still feel the same, shimmering desire for the moon that I felt long ago-to feel the amazement of the world and from the world, but feels more ghostlike now, worn with time. For now, I seek growth and betterment, and through discovering myself, a sense of contentment that feels unattainable and far away, elusive.
You sound a lot like an Fi type from this. It kind of sounds like you are trying to bait out an INFP typing.

3. Think about a time where you felt like you were at your finest. Tell us what made you feel that way.
I don’t know if there was ever a time that I felt true, unadulterated joy with myself. It seems every minute of who I was, of time is stained with my imperfection. I have never felt purely and wholly content with myself, but there are little glimmers of moments that I feel that I am truly on the way to growth. When I write, and surrender my heart to words and let them ignite with my desires and thoughts, I feel so full, liberated, inspired. There was also a time a few years ago where I felt truly good with myself. I had battled and grown through many of my quandaries, I had grown as a person, and I had begun to dip into the world of personality theory. I was exploring the crevices of myself without feeling overwhelmed, intellectually stimulated, discovering the beauty of life, and truly growing, without feeling barren, the way I do now. I also felt fully and truly connected with God and my faith, now so many barriers lie inside of me but before my mind and heart felt truly resplendent with love. I hadn’t begun to have identity crises the way I do now and I genuinely felt radiant and there was a certain innocence of those times. I loved learning in school, especially exploring literature, reading novels that provoked me, and falling captive to certain characters. I recognized the beauty of my mind without disdaining it. I went to a Renaissance fair with my choir and it was so fascinating, I loved the freedom and beauty and innocence of those times. I was young and old all at once and I feel I have crossed that barrier now, it feels so far away. I had also begun to make such genuinely inspiring and true friendships. That time in my life dazzled most with promise, I think.
more of the same bloviation

4. What makes you feel inferior?
I have recently discovered and realized that throughout so much of my childhood, feelings of inferiority gripped me. If I witnessed something beautiful or magnificent that someone else created or said, I burned with an innate feeling of inferiority and envy. I especially feel inferior when belittled or convicted for my flaws. The moments when the words of others scar me and open my eyes to how wrong I have been, how much I hurt others, how terribly I hurt them, then I feel disgusted and ashamed and hopeless all at once. When others illuminate my monstrous side I feel so inferior and bathed in all my imperfection. I also tend to feel inferior when it comes to grades or reviews, constructive criticism. I have battled a fear of failure since childhood, constantly weighed by inadequacy. No idea or thought or feeling felt safe and I would veil so much in the classroom. I was afraid of imperfection, any number or comment that felt chastising to me would leave me feeling defeated.
okay

5. What tends to weigh on your decisions? (Do you think about people, pro-cons, how you feel about it, etc.)
This is a difficult question to tackle because it depends on so many factors intertwined. At the heart of a decision, I usually make it if it aligns with my heart, if I feel a sense of satisfaction or inspiration inside, if it feels right. It often depends on my own personal feelings, but also I try to account for how others feel too. Sometimes I feel I may need to sacrifice an innate desire for something because it would be hurtful to others, or I look deeper into my motivations and realize that it stems from a place of darkness. I don’t tend to shift through all of the pros and cons, although the central ones do arise in my mind, and overall I glean which side of a potential decision is most potent and most rewarding. Sometimes I do make logically grounded decisions but they usually almost always involve my heart or the hearts of others.
Definitely Fi

6. When working on a project what is normally your emphasis? Do you like to have control of the outcome?
When working on a project I try to create one as comprehensive and true and capturing of what I am researching and what I want to convey, all the little glimmers and shades and angles essential to what is being researched and the central meanings. For instance, when I conducted a sleep project in middle school, I tried to capture, at the heart of my project, the key idea that sleep was miraculous and could heal. But also try to incorporate all the details and angles that illuminate that message. For more artistic or poetic endeavors I try to create an emotional message and pour myself into its core as best as I can. This, again, is difficult to answer because projects range vastly. Sometimes I conduct haphazard ones to intrigue me, others are for personal growth, others are more scientific and focused on bearing scientific truths whereas others elucidate emotional thoughts and personal messages. As for outcomes, I try to remain open-minded but if it still feels like there is room for improvement or if we could transform a project in some way, I like to be able to communicate with that, however, sometimes my shyness clouds me and leaves me terrified of communicating how I feel unless I am truly comfortable with my partners.
I

8. When you want to learn something new, what feels more natural for you? (Are you more prone to be hands on, to theorize, to memorize, etc) Memorizing is quite challenging for me, and while my mind can retain little glimmers of information that strike it, they often get lost in my mind as I have trouble with perfectly holding vast amounts of information in my mind. I prefer to wade through seas of information and take everything in, while internally learning about something and trying to glean the key ideas of a topic-I might carry little sparks of information that especially reinforce a concept, however. I am not particular hands-on as I struggle with creating buildings or diagrams, but highlighting and writing down does help me to centralize what I have learned.
Maybe N

9. How organized do you to think of yourself as?
As a child, I tended fall into a whirlwind of organizing my entire room and it almost immediately dissolved into a tundra. I struggle with organization and am not naturally clean, and I used to embrace that as beautiful, as I found it less constricting and more creatively releasing. But lately, I have begun to become more organized, discovering habits that allow me to remain on track and guide me. For instance, my planner was a saving grace during the school year as it allowed me to list and keep everything contained, without getting lost in all of the due dates. Even though I have begun to grow far more cleaner, however, at heart I believe that I am not naturally bound to cleanliness, I would rather not devote so much time to something that feels meaningless and grueling to me (even though healing can sometimes also feel very cathartic and rewarding, inspiring me to begin a new chapter, self-reflect or feeling inspired to transform my life).
P

10. How do you judge new ideas? You try to understand the principles behind it to see if they make sense or do you look for information that supports it? When I judge new ideas, I try not to remain narrow-minded and recognize its beauty (especially because as a child I would often fall into a narrow-minded, black and white scope), and try to see if I agree with it and how it ties into what I have learned and how I feel. I don’t necessarily always feel the need to probe further and find specific data to corroborate it, and I am not very factually-oriented unless it very much provokes me and I want to learn more about where it derives from. If the basic idea seems feasible to me or even just seems to hold potential, or something that I feel could improve our world and its growth, then I accept it, although I may not truly adopt it unless it fires me inside.
More Fi

11.You find harmony by making sure everyone is doing fine and belonging to a given group or by making sure that you follow what you believe and being yourself?
I feel torn between both. In a group I try to follow and remain true to what shimmers in my heart, what feels right, anything that makes me internally clamor or feels a sense of discord, I try to distance myself from. However, in middle school, I so often fell into the trap of sacrificing myself and becoming tangled in drama and gossip and shutting who I was into darkness. I would always feel uncomfortable with releasing myself and felt the need to shroud myself because it felt so unsafe. In a group, if I see anyone feeling estranged or hurt, I try to make sure that they feel comfortable and included, although I was often quite blind and insensitive to that when I was younger. So I feel like I try to dip my toes into both worlds, make sure that everybody feels nurtured and truly safe in a group but also following my own heart and not letting darkness ensnare me.
Fi

12. Are you the kind that thinks before speaking or do you speak before thinking? Do you prefer one-on-one communication or group discussions?
Although sometimes my tongue does slip and create swordlike statements that could hurt others without realizing it, I genuinely prefer to let my thoughts drift inside before I speak. Especially due to my social anxiety, I feel uncomfortable with truly releasing my thoughts unless they feel well-developed or truly illuminating. I prefer one-on-one communication far, far more because groups feel so imprisoning. My voice feels constantly shattered and invisible in group conversations, and overall, they feel overwhelming. But in personal conversations, the barriers fall and everything feels so much more comforting, liberating. Sometimes I do treasure group conversations, however, especially my groups from childhood because it feels so much more whole that way. Together we all hold a special bond, strengthened by time that strings us. I loved sitting in my childhood groups and sharing secrets and pondering about ghost stories, and we all had our own unique voice and it was beautiful to witness all of us melding together. So I prefer personal conversations, unless they are intimate, small groups that I cherish.
I

13.Do you jump into action right away or do you like to know where are you jumping before leaping? Does action speaks more than words?
It depends. Sometimes I feel spontaneous desires glittering at my heartstrings and I feel so excited or inspired by a new project that I eagerly leap into it, but most of the time I like to know where I am leaping into, have an idea inside or feel comfortable with what I am pursuing. For instance, as a child I felt deeply traumatized by rollercoasters and would avoid them vehemently, lunging into anything that made me feel threatened or uncomfortable, I would fervently avoid. However, I also sometimes want to begin a new project quickly or feel propelled to write something, trim a little of my hair, but I need to generally feel comfortable with something before lunging into it. It’s also challenging for me to answer whether I believe actions or words more valuable to me. As a writer, words simmer with the deepest secrets that I harbor and capture all the feelings and thoughts that glint inside of me. Although I may act one way in public my words could reveal an entirely different story, and I truly believe that language can shine a light on one’s innermost self in a way that actions cannot. However, it can also prove the inverse-if someone has a silver tongue they still might, although bewitching others with their words, hurt others irrevocably through their actions, illuminating who they truly are. So I think it depends on the individual. Some hide through their actions, others through words. For me personally, words are the mirrors of my innermost self, to others they may blind others from who they are at heart.
I

14.It's Saturday. You're at home, and your favorite show is about to start. Your friends call you for a night out. What will you do? It depends. If I feel such an insatiable desire to watch the show and it truly captivates me and refreshes me, then I would probably sacrifice time with friends for watching the show. However, if I can record the show and watch it later, and if the time with friends will be precious and intimate and if we haven’t spent much time with each other, I would probably sacrifice the show. It’s difficult to answer because I feel socially devoid lately, and my friendships have been withering. I spend most of my days alone, and while I find it refreshing, I would also probably desire to spend more time with friends (despite the harrowing anxiety) than usual because I feel so depleted.
I

15.How do you act when you're stressed out? I suppose it depends-outside of the house I often remain veiled in my solitude, bottling my stress and letting myself drown in my thoughts without vocalizing or expressing how I truly feel. However, at home, I might explode, my emotions erupting inside of me and turning me into a monster. When stressed at home I either dissolve into my emotions or let anger fuel me, and I become lost in my negative emotion. Other times I remain far calmer and try to look towards my inner light and derive a sense of hope, without letting my turmoil destroy me. So it depends on how much the stress corrodes me inside and the extent of my agony. If there are glimmers of hope I try to allow them to guide me and lead me to a sense of growth without letting my darkness and fear overcome me, but if I feel an overriding sense of hopelessness I often combust.
not a fan of stress typing

16. What makes you dislike the personalities of some people? A sheer lack of compassion and sensitivity absolutely disgusts me. When people belittle others intentionally or attack others for what they feel or believe, or act belligerent, I feel repelled. I try to seek out inspiring, true people that I feel comfortable with. Anybody that tries to lower me or make me feel less than while verbally sparring at or taunting me makes me dislike a person. I also despise when my voice feels trampled on by others. Although I don’t try to dominate the conversation, in the depths I desire to feel heard and valued and understood, and when others either belittle me, taunt my way of thinking or ignore me, only using my friendship without truly desiring to learn about me as a person, it especially hurts. Otherwise, I try to embrace a rainbow of personalities and recognize the beauty that glimmers from each person’s mind, although too energized and loud people can overwhelm me, although I appreciate that they can pull me out of my shell.
F

17. Is there anything you really like talking about with other people?
I love forging sacred and beautiful connections with others, where we can share memories or a special bond inside or recognize shades of ourselves in each other. I love sharing my stories with people and speaking about what intrigues me, from interesting movies or topics or experiences that I cherish, or learning more about the way they think and feel. I love when we can probe into the depths of who we are, into childhood, and learn from each other. I love speaking about books and how they grip me and stories that I love. With those that I am especially close with I love exploring grander topics, like the origins of the universe and glimmers of lessons they have taken in over time or interesting phenomena.
this is probably the most common answer to this question.

18. What kind of things do pay the least attention to in your life? I don’t feel naturally inclined to learn about the practical realities and responsibilities of life. In my heart, I tend to shut out the news and turmoil of the outer world because it feels so painful and frightening. I like to flood away into my own realm of comfort, what I find beautiful and intriguing. I don’t like confronting the harsh truths of the world, like discrimination and injustice, because it hurts so much. It feels so vast, too vast to handle and I feel an inward sense of menace because I feel I am not doing enough to shape the world into a better place. I also don’t pay much attention to my wellbeing or practicalities such as eating healthy, remaining efficient, thinking about the responsibilities chained to the future because it steals from my sense of hope and inspiration. Too many nuances feel overwhelming at once, and the dark and looming responsibilities sometimes seem so daunting to me, and I inwardly repress them because I don’t feel naturally gravitated towards paying attention to them.
If you are INFP then you have Si tertiary. That would be paying attention to the practicalities of life and a lot of times people will say it has to do with your well being.

19. How do your friends perceive you? What is wrong about their perception? ? What would your friends never say about your personality? I feel that many people, even my friends perceive me as dull and empty. They don’t recognize the beauty and complexity of my mind and all the secrets that I hold. Sometimes I feel they shut out and don’t recognize that I have a voice to share, because I veil it inside. They might perceive me as innocent and overly-rule following while they do not know the contradicting thoughts flooding through my head, and fail to recognize my inner light. They would probably never describe me as bold and confident, and in that aspect, they would be right because I am constantly splintered by fear and insecurity. I also struggle to be open about my thoughts and sugar-coat them, or repress them often, even my deepest opinions (even though I have periods where I desire to communicate about them).
Fi

20. You got a whole day to do whatever you like. What kind of activities do you feel like doing?
Ooh, this sounds intriguing. I would probably feel inclined to drown in a little literature, reading books that I cherish or ones that I have meant to read for the longest time but never had the willpower to begin. Perhaps I would stroll into a little, enchanted bookstore and look for novels that fascinate me, and sink into books there. I would probably spend most of my time watching my favorite movies or shows, either old ones that I love, or new ones with premises that magnetize me. I would probably sit in bed and feel inclined to eat my favorite Chinese food while spending time reflecting on my life and who I have become, and begin writing the novel that I have always wanted to write. And then...maybe just look into the stars with my dog. And watch one of the most beautiful movies that I have ever watched, Mermaids, because I feel an insatiable longing inside for a time I never knew and I treasure it very, very much. And into the night, spending time with the stories that I appreciate most and spending a day intense and comforting at the same time (perhaps watching conspiracy theory or true crime videos on YouTube as they mesmerize me). Something fulfilling and yet satisfying, settling at once. I also follow a film channel that I haven’t watched in the longest time, but it made school-like films that I loved to watch, perhaps I would rediscover it and watch its newest videos because I haven’t in the longest time.
I think you are ISFP. I mean without a shadow of a doubt you are a cartoonish example of Introverted Feeling in just about every thing you answer. You are so hyper obsessed with yourself. I would say to the point that I think you are almost a maladjusted ISFP and your dominant function is just all you use for anything. There is very little room for any other part of your personality it seems. Perhaps you are more Se than I give you credit for and you have an obsession with aesthetics that comes across with the excess language, but if you are INFP then you are severely badly developed because you answer about how you have this incredible magical gift of a mind that is all the things but don't have Si and I think the monster you are referring to in you is your inferior Te. When you talk about the day being all yours you basically indulge in Se not Ne though. There is a loop theory which I'm not super fond of but allegedly if you are ISFP you hit an Fi-Ni loop and maybe that's the explanation for the just ridiculous amounts of fluff you have. This questionnaire isn't particularly driven to get many questions for your perceiving though so it could also be that. Particularly in your final question you get very physical. Your day consists of where you would walk, what you would see, and what you would eat in more detail than anything else.

I like to keep my train of thought down so you can check the thoughts I had. I would say ISFP.


I'm now beginning to feel even more confused about my personality. I keep noticing glimmers of different functions arise in my memory and I generally feel so detached from myself. A constantly evolving person. Beneath the layers of time and growth, I want to discover who I really am, but it feels so clouding and confusing. I searched for the longest time and still feel unsure about who I really am. So any input would be interesting at all. I just feel extremely lost and severed from myself. Only these words are the final posts of who I am, despite my ever-changing mind, they glimmer with my eternal being.

I'm also terrified that all of this, this seeking and wandering and hoping to discover myself derives from a desire to create a beautiful image for myself, of who I want to become. But that's not true. I want to tap into the secrets of my mind and unlock all that I am, and come to learn more about myself. To bathe in the mystery of who I am.
For your reference this is an excerpt from Psychological Types by Jung on Introverted Feeling:

"The Introverted Feeling Type
[640] It is principally among women that I have found the predominance of
introverted feeling. “Still waters run deep” is very true of such women.
They are mostly silent, inaccessible, hard to understand; often they hide
behind a childish or banal mask, and their temperament is inclined to
melancholy. They neither shine nor reveal themselves. As they are mainly
guided by their subjective feelings, their true motives generally remain
hidden. Their outward demeanour is harmonious, inconspicuous, giving an
impression of pleasing repose, or of sympathetic response, with no desire
to affect others, to impress, influence, or change them in any way. If this
outward aspect is more pronounced, it arouses a suspicion of indifference
and coldness, which may actually turn into a disregard for the comfort and
well-being of others. One is distinctly aware then of the movement of
feeling away from the object. With the normal type, however, this happens
only when the influence of the object is too strong. The feeling of
harmony, therefore, lasts only so long as the object goes its own moderate
way and makes no attempt to cross the other’s path. There is little effort to
respond to the real emotions of the other person; they are more often
damped down and rebuffed, or cooled off by a negative value judgment.
Although there is a constant readiness for peaceful and harmonious coexistence,
strangers are shown no touch of amiability, no gleam of
responsive warmth, but are met with apparent indifference or a repelling
coldness. Often they are made to feel entirely superfluous. Faced with
anything that might carry her away or arouse enthusiasm, this type
observes a benevolent though critical neutrality, coupled with a faint trace
of superiority that soon takes the wind out of the sails of a sensitive person."
 

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Discussion Starter #4 (Edited)
hmm...that's very intriguing. I still feel most magnetically connected to INFP, even though ISFP is a possibility. I know that my last questions is very chockful of sensory detail, but I believe I still use Si more than Se because I treasure the past deeply, for more than the moment. I struggle with taking action in the present and am horribly uncoordinated, and in general, since childhood never felt a deep desire for physical stimulation (although this could be due to looping). My comfort zone feels like my oasis. However, you could be right. I feel a constant clamor about my personality type and something about ISFP feels wrong. It captures little glimmers of who I am but I feel that it fails to capture the overarching picture of who I truly am. But thank you for sharing your thoughts, they were so illuminating :)

Edit: I am also 17 years old, so still developing, so young and new to the world. Perhaps there are many nuances and areas of my mind yet to be discovered, which is why typing feels so complicated.
 

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Hmm...I'm honestly not completely sure :D I love the new and bizarre. Anything that captures my mind and mentally intrigues me. As a child, my thoughts would dance wildly and spill. I would ramble without end and love exploring different thoughts, concepts, learning about different perspectives. Which is why I treasure debating. I love getting to wander into different halls of perspective and seeing where a person comes from. Also, I have looked back on many writings of the past and I notice traces of considering different possibilities rather than focusing on certainties. For instance, when I was battling with the loss of a friend, I didn't fixate on the most likely reason why our friendship had drifted, I was drowning in a host of what could have been: did I offend her, did I hurt her, was she angry with me, did she believe I was angry with her? And overall, since childhood, I love the idea of creating new ideas. My grandmother was a teacher and I would always feel a surging joy at the prospect of helping her, and I would love to come up with different projects from the class. Also, when I was younger, I had a habit of getting lost in obsessions and jumping from obsession to obsession. I would feel dazzled by mythology for a few months and then transition to the Romanovs, then transition into rhythmic gymnastics. Anything that intrigued me, my nose would sniff and then I would leap into. Also, I often feel I derive inspiration from the outside world, which I feel could potentially indicate Ne. For instance, if I read a poem about stars then I feel inspired to write a story about a girl that finds guidance in life through the constellations. I love finding inspirations and glimmers of wonder in the world around me. I also have an intriguing way of twisting situations to see them in different lights. For instance, if my friend lost her dog, I would try to help her see the lights at the end of the tunnel: that she can focus more on herself, that the memories of her dog are far more precious, that she can buy a new dog. I'm not sure if all of these indicate Ne and I could be warping them, but I feel that they perhaps might elucidate Ne usage.
 

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Actually just do this questionnaire and skip/delete any question that is a repeat question you have already answered in the previous questionnaire and I will be able to tell better than you self-identifying whatever you think it is. There is a stronger emphasis on the N vs S in this than the one you did.

1.) Is there anything that may affect the way you answer the questions? For example, a stressful time, mental illness, medications, special life circumstances? Other useful information includes sex, age, and current state of mind.

2.) What kind of person are you and why?

3.) What kind of person would you LIKE to be? Why? What kind of person would you NOT want to be? Why?

4.) A. What about your personality most distinguishes you from everyone else? B. If you could change one thing about you personality, what would it be? Why?

5.) Do you think there are any differences to how you described yourself and how people actually perceive you? How do you think others would describe you? If there are any discrepancies between these two that are you are aware of; do you know why exactly that is?

6.) What are some of your most important values? How did you come about determining them? How can they change?

7.) What makes you like the personalities of some people?

8.) What makes you dislike the personalities of some people?

9.) How do you react to new situations in your life? Can you describe an event in your life where you were in an unknown situation? How did you deal with it?

10.) How do you judge new ideas?

11.) What tends to weigh on your decisions?

12.) A. What activities energize you most? B. What activities drain you most? Why?

13.) A. Describe what an enjoyable situation is for you. B. Describe what a stressful situation is for you.

14.) Describe your relationship to authority. How do you perceive authority? What does it mean to you, and how do you deal with it?

15.) Describe your relationship to order and chaos. What do order and chaos mean to you? How do they manifest in your daily life?

16.) How do you treat hunches or gut feelings? In what situations are they most often triggered?

17.) Are you the kind that thinks before speaking or do you speak before thinking? Do you prefer one-on-one communication or group discussions?

18.) What is it that you desire in life? What do you strive to achieve? Why? Where do you think these drives and desires stem from or are inspired by?

19.) What is it that you fear in life? Why? How does this fear manifest to you both in how you think and how you act?

20.) What type do you think you are? Why this/these type(s)? Is there a type that appeals to you, to your self-perception, that you would like to be? Why?
 

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Discussion Starter #8
Here it is, I hope it can help somewhat in illuminating the difference :)

What kind of person are you and why?

3.) What kind of person would you LIKE to be? Why? What kind of person would you NOT want to be? Why?

I would like to be a person constantly growing, on a latter of growth and beauty and meaning. I want to see the beauty of the world and all the potential it holds without falling slave to my fears and the voices of others. I would like to be someone who inspires others, kindling the light in their hearts and leading them to a magnificent future, helping them discover light and purpose and true contentment. I would like to be someone, despite my flaws, with a strength honed by time and my heart, without falling defeat to insecurities. I would like to metamorphosize, both mind and heart. I would not want to become a deranged, selfish, arrogant human being. So many times in my life I have splintered others and failed to recognize how precious they were. I'm terrified of falling into that trap again. I would want to be someone blinded by darkness, the way I so often had been, and instead grow with wings of light.

4.) A. What about your personality most distinguishes you from everyone else? B. If you could change one thing about you personality, what would it be? Why?

This is a difficult question to tackle, but I would say my ability to infuse my own unique essence, my own perspectives into something. I feel that so many people become ensnared by the world around them, failing to recognize the dazzling, distinct beauty that they harbor and neglecting the distinct promise that they hold. My ability to, even while drowning in darkness and fear and shame, still cling to my sea of inner light, to hold a staff of hope and optimism and inner strength, is something that I deeply treasure. If I could change one aspect of myself, however, it would probably be my penchant to dwell on darkness. So often I become lost in my inner wounds or fears or anxieties, letting them tear me apart and strip from my heart. I want to embrace the looming darkness within but instead of allowing it to confine me, allow it to carry me to a grander level of hope and confidence and strength. I would transform my habit of letting darkness suffocate me into letting it strengthen me instead.

5.) Do you think there are any differences to how you described yourself and how people actually perceive you? How do you think others would describe you? If there are any discrepancies between these two that are you are aware of; do you know why exactly that is?
I feel that people only see a shell of who I am. Hollow, ghostlike, veiled. So many people perceive me as antagonistic and afraid of humankind. In a way, I do fear vulnerability, I do fear becoming trampled on by the world around me, but I also feel there are so many exquisite colors and thoughts and potential inside of me, swirling in the secret depths of my heart and mind. While I see myself as a seeker, a student of life, constantly searching for the magic that stirs me inside, that kindles my mind, others would probably see me as a faint ghost of a person in the background, someone afraid of life. And although in many ways I am afraid of the world surrounding me, its ruthlessness and pain, and grotesqueness, I still see it as lovely and so beautifully complex at once. I also feel that people see me as far more cynical and dark than I truly am. Although I can often let darkness clothe me, deep inside my inner light pervades, no matter what cyclone of worry and fear tries to destroy me, my inner flame constantly brims inside, and I feel that many people fail to recognize how much I harbor and hold, how much I want to share with the world and how much I want to give to others. My heart weeps constantly and I feel people perceive at as silent when in truth it constantly gushes with longing and thoughts and wishes and wants to give itself to the world.

6.) What are some of your most important values? How did you come about determining them? How can they change? I would say that some of my most important values include forgiveness, growth, and resilience.

Forgiveness is an especially fragile and potent one in my life because I know how healing and sacred it is. So many times I have hurt others and felt so eclipsed by shame. I know the magic of forgiveness and the power of giving your heart to another person, and accepting their flaws. I know the beauty of rising above the darkness. I know how, although we can become monstrous and ruthless, we are truly fragile creatures on the earth that yearn for more, that, deep down, came into this earth not understanding what it would be and falling along the way. I understand the value of forgiveness especially because I have desired it and I understand how special it is. My mistakes and transcending from them also ties into my values of growth and resilience. I know what it feels like to feel so small, to feel inched by your transgressions and feel suffocated by your flaws. And how truly powerful and inspiring it is to learn from that and to grow, to embrace your smallness but to seek betterment. And I especially admire the stories of those who have fallen into the hands of evil, had their innocence and worth and lives shattered, and conquered them with grace. Like Elizabeth Smart and Maria Goretti, two beautiful women exploited for the gift of their womanhood, that still armored their hearts with mercy and let their inner strength heal them-their resilience endlessly inspires me.

9.) How do you react to new situations in your life? Can you describe an event in your life where you were in an unknown situation? How did you deal with it?

It depends on the situation. Sometimes I perceive it as beautiful and exciting, other times diabolically frightening. For instance, in social situations, I especially feel trapped when having to interact with new groups of people because my tongue feels weighed by insecurity. There was a time I had to stay at a retreat overnight with a group of girls and felt so afraid because it was thrown at me and I hadn't expected it. I hadn't had time to digest how much vulnerability the situation would require and how challenging it would be to unleash myself from my comfort zone. In the end, however, I slowly began to assimilate and find little glimmers of light in the situation. I found comfort and joy in speaking about my favorite literature and the interesting stories told, and I especially found the time that we prayed with candles so hauntingly divine. I loved getting lost in the fire and watching all of us, so vulnerable, surrender ourselves to God. In general, I try to look past my clouds of worry and fear for the beams of hope a situation offers, and slowly I get pulled into it, recognizing its beauty.

12.) A. What activities energize you most? B. What activities drain you most? Why?

I love activities that intrigue my mind and allow me to explore my thoughts. I especially loved taking Create Writing and the little prompts we were given because they challenged me, and I loved getting lost in certain plots. Something about it felt so tantalizing. I also love to read, because, as I described before, words are my best friends. They guide me and inspire me and speak the language of my heart. Getting lost in a lovely story and learning about myself in the process is something that I treasure very much. Activities where I can learn about something enchanting, magnetic, or expand my mind ultimately excite me. However, I very much despise activities that involve grueling logic or dry thought. Anything that requires having to stifle emotion or creativity or expression feels so painful. I very much despise overly physical activities, such as sports. Since childhood I could never understand them, a puzzle my mind could never fathom. As I watched people run across the screen it felt like a bizarre ritual that made me feel opposed, and in general, my coordination is nonexistent. Any activities that make me feel uncomfortable, deplete my mind, or in general fail to enrich me, I tend to avoid.

13.) A. Describe what an enjoyable situation is for you. B. Describe what a stressful situation is for you. An enjoyable situation for me would probably be a rosy and intriguing one filled with comfort but also mentally enriching.

For instance, I love wandering in the library and finding books that captivate me and sinking into them. The familiarity and hominess of the world of books is so welcoming, and the glorious prospect of finding a beautiful new world to invite into my heart and mind is something I cherish very much. One far away from the butchering darkness of civilization, in my own little mind, without the strife and horror and pain of the world would be rather enjoyable. A stressful situation for me would be one where my heart is constantly lashed by criticism, where I am belittled for my imperfections. In my human anatomy class last year, I felt this way. So deflated and defeated. There was a girl in my group that would bully me into trying to dissect an animal, which I would do incorrectly because I struggled to precisely cut into the correct areas, and she would try to cage me with her words and antagonism. It was one of the most defiling periods of my life and I hope that I never have to experience such belittlement in the future.

14.) Describe your relationship to authority. How do you perceive authority? What does it mean to you, and how do you deal with it?
I find authority beautiful when it nurtures and cultivates. I don't necessarily perceive it as the Big Bad Wold as so many stories seem to portray. My mother is a graceful and wonderful figure of authority. She alleviates my darkness and guides me during the most traumatic times of my life, and even when I feel stifled or constricted by her rules, I revere them because I understand she knows what is best for me. There is a beauty in authority when it tries to preserve and lead others to a beautiful path of light and safety and comfort. However, in certain systems authority can be quite corrupt. In the way it can bind others and blind them from who they really are, and chain them from rules that strip of their essence and break them. In elementary school so many of my teachers tried to inhibit my creativity, failing to realize the unique wonder of who I was and seeing me as a nuisance, a flaw in the system. But my other teachers instilled in me an infinite and potent love of learning, a beautiful one, and fostered in me my journey as a student of life. So authority can be two sides of the same coin, light and dark. Nurturing and restricting, healing and stripping. It depends on the rules, whether or not they are abused, and the intent behind them, I personally feel.

15.) Describe your relationship to order and chaos. What do order and chaos mean to you? How do they manifest in your daily life?

I think this is a battle I endured a lot, especially in childhood.

Order was foreign to me. I was always the kind to wander, to never remain stagnant. My mind and heart were chaotic, and I was quite a tempest. To me order is beautiful, something I yearn from afar. I understand and honor its merits, how it can help to temper a person and lead them to a better life, but it still feels like a stranger to me. Whereas chaos is something that I feel simmers in my blood. It's something that always seems to chase after me and find me. Even when I acheive a glorious sense of stillness in my life it somehow seems to trample me. I think there's a beauty in the polarity of both but it is probably best to achieve a balance between them. Both are two different, exquisite layers of life that come and go, and I find myself drawn to both of them at different times, and I feel that I need to find my place in both of them in my life, although it can prove difficult.

16.) How do you treat hunches or gut feelings? In what situations are they most often triggered?

I do value gut feelings, especially when they can illuminate how somebody feels about me. In situations where I feel a looming sense of belligerence when entering an argument or in a risky situation, I try to trust them and see if they can illuminate what somebody thinks or feels about me and the situation at hand. I have a strangely uncanny ability to be able to tell when somebody feels romantically about me. Sometimes it is a glimmer in the eye, the words used, sometimes nothing at all, but my heart has an eerie way of detecting it (although I could be wrong). In general, I try to trust these gut feelings, but not let them consume me. To look at the multiple facets and not let them dominate my mind, but hold them closely in case they might guide me in a certain situation.


18.) What is it that you desire in life? What do you strive to achieve? Why? Where do you think these drives and desires stem from or are inspired by?

I think...as I explained before...I desire magic. So many times in life I feel this insatiable need for fulfillment, to follow the map of my heart. And see where it could lead me. I love letting my mind fall in love with the world and those around me. I desire that feeling, to constantly feel wonder and beauty and see the light in this complicated maze of life. In its stories, its tribulations, its evils. In all that it holds and offers. I strive to achieve a sense of growth and to keep exploring this magic and letting it guide me through the trials and quandaries I may face. I want to achieve a point in my life where I can also truly feel content in myself and see the goodness inside of me. To not constantly fall trap to the lie that I am evil and embrace the beauty of my mind and accept it for what it is. I don't know where are why these desires pull me, perhaps time has curdled them. Perhaps it is just who I am, a seeker and searcher and student of life, wanting to learn and to grow. Maybe the fire inside humans, the fire to evolve propelling me. Or maybe it is because it was ingrained in me in childhood. I'm not sure.

19.) What is it that you fear in life? Why? How does this fear manifest to you both in how you think and how you act? I fear...falling defeat to my sins and my fears, I believe. For letting darkness damp my hope and becoming enslaved by hopelessness, for becoming a prisoner to my insecurity and doubt. I fear the monstrousness of myself and who I am and all the contradictions and my flaws, and it causes me to seek perfections. The desire to better myself often leaves me sorely disappointed and even hateful towards myself, causing me to repress my flaws and seek to bury them in memories (or, on the other end, letting them consume me). My fear of imperfection often inhibits my inner light, leaving me unwilling to act.

20.) What type do you think you are? Why this/these type(s)? Is there a type that appeals to you, to your self-perception, that you would like to be? Why?

I'm honestly not sure at all. Since I began the chapter of personality theory, I discovered a home in INFP. It might be wearing with time, it might not be mine, I might be in the wrong box. All I know is that it has opened my eyes in so many ways and feels so comforting to me. I began not knowing anything about MBTI to becoming someone intrigued with and fairly well-versed in theory, carving beautiful friendships with people who saw the world like I did and had the same desires as me. And overall, even if I am lying to myself, even if I change my mind over time, I feel there will always be a little whisper inside of me telling me that I am an INFP. The two types that especially appeal to me are INFJ and ENFP. INFJ for their pure sophistication and ability to transform the world. Their minds are so vast and complicated and miraculous and its so intriguing to learn about them, their razor insight, and their ability to empathize with others so seamlessly without letting their own emotion cloud them is one that I admire. I also have met so many ENFPs in my life and they are such beautiful souls. They permeate my life with laughter and sunshine and seem to look past how the world sees me and see the girl inside. There is one ENFP boy that I met that amazes me. His glittering wit, his intelligence while constantly remaining empathetic, is so overwhelming. He fills my life with hope and for that I will always be grateful. I can only aspire to be as lovely as him.
 

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Discussion Starter #9
Here are also my thoughts revolving around the world of sensing and intuition, I was wondering what you would say based on them:

I love words. They are beautiful, they are exquisite, my guiding light. Almost my entire life I gravitated towards them and I feel they allow me to capture my racing thoughts. I love poetry, I love inspiration, I love feeling dazzled. As a child, I would ramble with my mother about everything and everything. My natural inclination was to speak. To express. To share all that I harbored. However, I am tied to my senses in a distinct and intriguing way. I have an eerie and uncanny way of describing fiery and vivid details and have an intricate sensory world inside. I could describe a flaming sun and its desperate pull on my skin, for instance. I appreciate the details and find them beautiful. And even though I deeply battled this in childhood, living in the moment is beautiful. The idea of getting lost in the moment, unbridled, unleashing your inner child is incredible. However, I can't help but dwell in the past and the future. There's a beauty in letting your thoughts wander, backward and forwards, across the past and into the future. I want both. I want to understand the sheer transience of the present while still harnessing memory in my heart and keeping my eyes on the horizon. I love tastes, touches, colors that evoke a beautiful impression in me. I also love thoughts, concepts, theories, debates perspectives. I feel I am in the middle of two worlds, a purgatory of sorts. I think i appreciate my senses, taking them in, seeing the beauty in the world around me, but I very, very, very much struggle with acting on it. I possess little to no coordination and struggle with painting, bringing colors and shapes to life. I appreciate and even long for visual arts but I am terrible at them. I much more inclined to tell stories through my words. I want to explore the world of ideas and details all at once. My interests are very verbal, language-oriented, and I have always had an obstinate hatred for sports, anything requiring physical coordination. Rollercoasters are nightmarish to me. I despise anything blistering to my senses. But the feeling of getting lost an a hypnotizing blue sky, there is something magical about that. I would love to also talk about the sky, it's history, its influences on art, what it could hold, why we feel gravitated towards it at the same time. I love discussing the world around me, what we say about it so alluring, I would venture even more intriguing than the aspects of the world itself. So...I suppose I'm a cross between both? I think we need a balance. We need to understand and immerse ourselves in the loveliness of the moments and details around us while at the same time, letting curiosity ignite us, letting our minds wander, letting time pull us back and forth. Both are very special to me.
 

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Okay my questionnaire cleared it up. You are INFP. Ne is more about finding new things and new ideas constantly. Se would be about aesthetic, outdoorsy, and physical things.
 
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