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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Hi there, I'm an ENFJ and I would love to know what my Enneagram type is. I'm pretty new to PerC so bear with me here :tongue: I hate filling out these personal questionnaires because I feel so self-absorbed constantly talking about myself. :angry:

1. What drives you in life? What do you look for?
The thing that motivates me the most is helping out. I love to do hands on stuff and interact with people. So I guess something that drives me when I'm having a tough time is seeing someone else with the look of real joy. But also the pure fact of just being alive helps me through everything. I feel really fortunate to have my life because I was adopted. I'd get lost in the back story so I'll just move on ehehe

2. What do you hope to accomplish in your life?
I hope to find a job that I absolutely love. Not just a "I do this job even though I hate it cause it rakes in the dough" job, I want something that I will enjoy through good and the bad. I'm pretty young so I have a big list. SO the basics of a nice family and yada yada. But this is only a dream; I wish I could change the world in some drastic way. I feel like I have to live my life to the fullest in whatever I do because I was given such a fortunate life. But I don't know how I would do it. So much for helping, I need an inspiration first! :unsure:

3. What do you hope to avoid doing or being? What values are important to you?
I want to avoid being judgemental, I mean being human we're all going to judge critically at some point, whether it be people, situations, etc. But I find it very shallow when people judge other people, and act as if they are truly better themselves in some way, because of a few mistakes someone else might have made(if that makes sense?) Or if they judge because of jealousy, I admit I have done it but it's a habit I try to avoid by stepping back and letting go.
I guess values important to me are the usual: Honesty, Optimism, Selflessness, healthy confidence, being supportive. I could go on and on I guess.
4. What are your biggest fears (not including phobias)? Why?
Being turned away from someone because I tried to help them, I feel like I did something wrong even if I cared about the person and was worried about them. I feel like I let them down, and I become very confused. Being too optimistic in certain situations, and being misunderstood. Losing my family and friends(is that a phobia?) Becoming a person that I strive not to be.

5. How do you want others to see you? How do you see yourself?
I want people to feel like I will always be there for them even if we aren't good friends. I want them to feel like I am a happy and independent person. I don't need to be the smartest or the strongest I just want to be trusted and looked up to. I see myself as a positive person who tries to help people but is not as accepted. Someone who makes decisions too eagerly sometimes while living in the moment, without thinking
6. What makes you feel your best? What makes you feel your worst?
I feel my best when I am around a bunch of people. I love to talk and just experience different people and situations. I like when I try new things that I enjoy and I love to help people and get to know them. I feel at my worst when people try to repeatedly insult me or outdo me. It's a pointless game of insults, but I know I'm kindof a hypocrite for saying that. But then again who isn't? But I also feel at my worst when there isn't much to look forward to. If I'm not constantly moving ahead in life I get really off track and lost.

7. Describe how you experience each of: a) anger; b) shame; c) anxiety.

a) I can become very sarcastic when angry. I tend to want to storm away because I give the upper hand to my opponent and can't handle the words that I leave unsaid.
b) I guess I interpret shame as kind of embarrassment? So usually I just shake it off and crack a joke or admit to it. I feel the sooner I forget, the sooner everyone else will.
c) Anxiety, I get into a weird state that feels almost depressing. When I'm in a short term anxiety fit, I go to one extreme of talking too much or too little. (for my talking standards that is) I try to distract myself from whatever is bothering me, or on the other hand I face it and break down a little.

8. Describe how you respond to each of: a) stress; b) unexpected change; c) conflict.
A) When I am stressed long term I feel like a weight in on my chest literally, and everything is out of place until the situation is fixed. Or I find a way to cheer back up.
B) I usually go with the flow unless the situation is worrying or tragic. Then I get kind of anxious, but its hard to tell because I'm fortunate enough to have been through barely any unexpected changes that are negative. So if you really want to know you would have to get more specific.
C) conflict. Ah the good old fighting. I can become once again sarcastic, I can be very easily insulted if I tend to get the vibe someone is really trying to fly a remark at me that wasn't totally obvious, or if my close friends or family judges me. I try to back up my argument with too much ranting. I need to learn to let fighting go.

9. Describe your orientation to: a) authority; b) power. How do you respond to these?
a) I feel in the right place when I'm in more of a leader position. When I'm just a background authority I feel like I don't have as much of a right to an opinion and am not as able to help with the group. Most of the people I work with tend not to listen when you fall into a "follower" category. Which is very rare for me in the first place so I don't have to worry. If I have something to say I make sure that I'm heard.
B)I'm not intimidated by a lot of power, as in having a lot of responsibility now if I were per say a very known leader like the President I would be quite scared. I wouldn't want to offend too many people and would feel too much to blame for most everything. I would be devastated to be hated on a large scale.

10. What is your overall outlook on life and humanity?
I've already mentioned this: I feel so so so so so blessed to be alive. I don't always understand why or how we are all here, but all I know is how amazing it is to be alive. I was adopted from a different country and my town was in deep poverty, My personal story is what gives me the urge to live life to the fullest. Life is a beautiful thing and so many people have had theirs taken away it's hard almost impossible to feel fortunate I feel like as humans we should all help each other out, because we populate the world so immensely and we should take care of all the things in it.


Optional Questions

11. Discuss an event that has impacted your life significantly; more importantly, how you responded to it.

Once again, My adoption story. My birth mother had 3 abortions before me. I have no living known siblings. Whenever I notice myself being selfish or pitying myself for a stupid reason I think of them and I know how lucky I am to be here. I try to forget whatever I used to think was a big deal and honor my past and all the people I left behind unknowingly. I always feel like I am obligated to pay them back somehow. Ya know? Like I'm the only one that made it into a perfect home with an amazing family. I owe them my life.



12. Comment on your relationship with trust.
I don't usually trust many people at first. I have a friendly trust, but when it comes to closer relationships I only have select few. Because most people with say one thing and do the opposite. I can spot these traits pretty early on so I'm careful who I let in on my secrets. I have trust issues in dating too. I'm very cautious with the word "love" Mostly because I am in highschool. So its rare to find true love. I don't immediately say "I love you" to my boyfriend as soon as we start dating. In my perspective now "love" is a very special word and not something you just throw out there to fill in the awkward silences. I don't want to be lied to about "love" just so they can get more intimate or just to say it because everyone else does. I also find it hard to let them know the truth about my self image issues. I may seem happy and confident, but I have those long periods of time where I feel worthless. I get very uncomfortable with myself and I reject most compliments because I don't believe them. Once again I don't want them to lie to me just to make me feel good. Even though I realize they have good intentions and really do care about me, I just get very un-confident when it comes to "truth be told you're beautiful" type conversation. I just don't believe in myself in physical ways. sorry I rant about my depressing side, at times people think I'm just trying to gain more compliments when I tell the truth about what I think about myself. But when it comes to the core of it. I almost break down crying. I think I don't like it when my romantic interest or whoever compliments me because I don't want to fall for it. I'm afraid of being too gullible then being so hurt in the end. I know I'm not the most beautiful thing so I don't want them to say that, because it's just a lie and I don't want to lie to myself about believing it, just because I heard it. Sorry again Can someone help me with this problem :( I realized I turned this into a therapy session oh well :sad:
13. List some of the traits you: a) like; b) dislike most about yourself.
A) My outgoing personality, my honesty, my theatricality, my ability to easily find happiness in random things
B) My stubbornness, my attitude when I'm frustrated, my secret low self esteem, the way I am easily hurt or offended but I pretend like it doesn't phase me,


14. What do you see or notice in others that most people don't?
The way I can see their strengths, and giving people the benefit of the doubt. But I can also easily tell if someone is lying about themselves just to fit in or be dramatic.

15. If a stranger insults you, how do you respond/feel? What if they compliment you?
I feel very frustrated and flabbergasted, I either don't reply, or become snappy and sarcastic(I need a synonym for sarcastic)
When they compliment me I feel proud, I feel like they are a very nice person if it is a genuine compliment, I usually respond with a form of thanks and a responding compliment. I put on a big smile and it usually makes my day to be randomly noticed by a person nice enough to tell me.

16. What's something you are: a) thankful you have; b) wish you could have? Why?
A) My life and keen sense of where I am going in life. Some people are completely lost in life I feel bad for these people and I wish I could give them the motivation I have because it's an amazing blessing.
B) More opportunities to make a difference, and a chance to thank my birth family. I want to help the world, and I owe so much to my birth family for having the courage to give me up, no matter what the circumstances, the good, bad, and ugly. I appreciate them. Without them I wouldn't be where I am today



Thank you so much for reading! Hope it wasn't too much to process :wink:
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
Thank you so much! It's a little scary how true the second link was. Once I got the the 2w3 I felt intruded because it was so real to me. Hahaha, It's amazing how humans can learn to understand each other so truthfully. Enneagrams with definitely help me grow as a person.
 

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Haha, I forgot to mention that such heavy use of the emoticons are another sign of being a 2 :p Just one of those reoccurring traits I notice only in 2s.

Ya, the Enneagram is useful for development because it shows you the problem with your psychology, and with this understanding you can lessen the negative tendencies.
 
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