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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Hey everybody, this is Teddy, a 26 year old, employed male ISFJ. (though since I teach high school, I’m actually off for the summer…yay!) I heard about the Myers-Briggs personality type system a long time ago, but over this last year someone mentioned it to me again and I bought a few books about it. I got so much out of it, and now that I have some more relaxed time, I explored a bit and I found this site. It looks pretty cool because I’ve gotten a lot out of the books that I read and it’d be neat to talk to others about all of it.

Finding out about the MB type theory has actually been a huge help to me. A lot of my life I’ve felt like there are a lot of things about me that felt weird or unusual, and a lot of times that’s caused me to feel lonely, self-conscious and out of place. Sometimes I’ve even felt like there’s something wrong with me because I wasn’t like a lot of people that I knew. I was usually able to overcome these feelings (or if nothing else, ignore them), but by finding out about my own type (and others’), I’ve understood a lot more about myself, I’ve felt like I’ve connected to others, and I’ve gained confidence in who I am rather than what I’ve felt like I should be sometimes (not to mention learning about other people I know as well).

The really cool thing has been finding out that the reasons for my self-consciousness are actually related to me being an ISFJ too! So understanding that it’s natural for my type to have those kinds of issues has made me feel like it’s something I can overcome mentally too.

I guess I’ll give some examples. First, clearly is the whole introverted thing. I’ve always kept tons and tons of thoughts internally to myself, I’ve always enjoyed spending a lot of time alone, I’ve always gotten shy/uncomfortable in big groups, and I’ve always taken a while to warm up to people and think before I speak. But from what I read, about 75% of Americans are extraverted, meaning that these introverted qualities were unusual. I’ve always felt pressured into thinking that I should be going out more, that I don’t have enough friends, that I should force myself to be more outspoken…but all of these things are things that didn’t really matter personally to me…I just felt like I was “supposed” to be like that.
But I’ve now realized that it’s ok for me to be introverted like that, and I shouldn’t force myself to be something that I’m not just for other people. That doesn’t mean that I can’t step outside of myself at times to be more extraverted…but when I do it, I’m doing it because I want to, not because I feel like I’m supposed to.


It’s a similar case with being a feeling type, especially since I’m male. I’ve seen now why a lot of times I take things so personally, why I’m so sensitive compared to some people, and especially why a lot of other people can do say so much and gloss over the emotion so easily.


I’ll put the sensing/judging more together since that creates my temperament. This was kind of interesting because it’s outlined all of my mental organizations, my huge, almost OCD-like desire for structure in my life, and my hard working mentality meant to keep things going smoothly. I also find it interesting that I have such a desire to be ready and prepared, that I have a tendency to assume the worst, even if it’s not true…and this leads me to feel more negative about the future than I should be.


But it’s when all of these have been put together that makes the whole thing so completely fascinating to me. My feeling side gives me a lot of emotions, my sensing leads me to notice the details of them, my introversion leads me to keep them to myself, and my judging leads me to keep them very organized. I also see why I can be so sensitive and shy, and also why I tend to put others before myself. Finally, I also see how I do that so much, and am so calm-natured, that it leads me to be taken for granted, especially since I keep others happy and keep things running smoothly. Of course, since I feel so much better when others praise me, it causes me hurt to be ignored, especially since I work so hard.


But, that’s the huge beauty of me realizing all of this about myself. I’ve loved reading the advice sections in some of these books, because it makes me feel so much better about myself. I understand more about why I feel bad sometimes and why others’ actions sometimes lead to that…especially since they a lot of times don’t mean it, and usually have no idea they’re making me feel that way!



Here’s some of the advice that has really helped me:
“Pat yourself on the back…don’t wait for others to”
“Remember that there is no one right way to live. What counts is that you are satisfied.”
“Beware of excessive worrying. Don’t spend too much time focusing on worst-case scenarios.”
“Do not underestimate yourself and your accomplishments…talk about them.”


There’s probably a lot more that I could say, but I’ll leave it at that for now. I just wanted to say how great the MB system has helped me out a lot, and how it’s cool to be able to talk about all of it here. I know that I have to be careful not to get too obsessed with it all, but when kept under control, I’ve found it to be a very helpful tool for me.

Happy to be here!
 

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Welcome to PersonalityCafe!

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Greetings teddy564339 and welcome to PersonalityCafe!! My name is Mr. CafeBot. I am here to personally greet you and thank you for joining our humble little forum. No matter your type, you will surely experience a wonderful time with the members of this forum. We cater to all personality types so you will never feel alone or weird. Truth is this forum is full of weirdos!! Pleazeee hel.... *Ahem*I mean we have the nicest people you will ever meet. :)

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Hi Teddy, welcome to the forum. :happy:
 

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YAY! Another ISFJ!

Welcome! You should be at home here. Plenty of awesome ISFJs here, including me :laughing:

You sound like you're very concerned about being prepared for things and that's a good thing. I probably don't do that as much. I may even hope for the best in certain situations actually.

You're a teacher in high school! Cool! I was considering switching from engineering to education because I seem to know how to teach people things in general and I enjoy it. I'm in college by the way.

Even sensing judgers are interesting and different people. Especially the introverts!
 

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Discussion Starter · #13 ·
I did not know this...that's rather interesting.
Yeah, I mean, it's hard to say the validity of it, but I read it in more than one book...though some said it was 70% or 66%. It's also interesting because it mentioned that in many Asian cultures, it's far more normal to be introverted. But as soon as I read it, I thought "Hey, that's why sometimes I feel like I'm the quiet one so much!"

I also read a few other percentages about Americans...about 75% are sensors as well.

In addition, males are more likely to be thinkers, and females more likely to be feelers. Again, the numbers were somewhere between that 66% and 75% of males being thinkers, and about the same number for females being feelers.


But I think that's the other thing...me being a male IF, those qualities are traditionally more female, further explaining why in the past sometimes I've felt out of place. But again, that's what's cool about all of this...kind of coming to peace about a lot of it.
 
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