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Discussion Starter #1
Hello,

I recently had enneagram testing and evaluation done as a part of marriage counseling. Our therapist explained these results and gave us some handouts, and I went home and found this website searching for better understanding. So Im a type 4w5 and my husband is a type 3w2. Im on my second marriage and I have one foot out the door.... I felt very certain that my husband doesnt love me at all, but now I dont know what to think. I guess its possible he loves me, but I still feel hurt and I cant see it... Maybe I just shouldnt be married to anyone if im so unreasonable in my expectations. I feel ashamed like all this time the problem has been me. This is so hard
 

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Hi adorme,

welcome :) - I'm new to this forum too but am working with the enneagram for a while already.

I read some confusion and distress out of your words (hehe, as a 4 you love that :D). You seem to blame you for some things of the past. But the first step is taken, you are now in marriage counseling, you have learned more about your different personalities and perhaps what pushes your buttons. I once read a book - "Love yourself and it doesn't matter who you marry" (I don't know how good the english translation is but the original book give quite much insights) - perhaps this is something for you.

Hugs
 
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Hi CHR15T1N4,

Thanks for replying. I was able to download the book "Love Yourself And It Doesn’t Matter Who You Marry" to my kindle. Thanks for the recommendation. I hope im am able to laugh at myself soon, but right now I feel lost. Im going to start reading now.
 

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I wish you all the best,
independent of the decision you make - you will get over this and there will be better times.
 
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