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Hi Everyone,

This is my first post.

I was hoping for a little help understanding the craziness that is my brain. My understanding of personailty types is there are 16 of them. Thats all i got... I have done one of those personality tests already but I wanted to see what you seasoned pyschology gurus come up with objectively with an open mind.

Brief biography

i born/live in Australia but am sicilian blood/culture. Left handed I used to work in the Home Loan / Financial Advice industry.

I am currently unemployed looking at personality types to learn abuot myself, see what other industries might be relevant for me.

There may be spelling errors in this post. im not going back through it to check. Where is the spell check button?

Anyway -

I was brought up in a private religous school (evangelical christian) where i struggled with authority due my need to socialise at inapproproate times and questioning some of the things they taught.

couple of schools later i end up at public high school. my marks generally reflected how much i liked the teacher apart from maths. There was generally someone who wanted to fight me at each school i went to but I usually talked my way out of it. i was generally liked enough once i settled in to each school but didnt mind if somoone didnt like me as i kept in touch with people from my previous schools. i played soccer most of my schooling and ran athletics. I didnt have alot of girlfriends over the years with majority of relationships being short term. it seems it was easy to attract someone if i wasnt that interested in them but if i actually liked them id 'choke' out some way or another.

I am a natural at maths and arguments and my hand / eye isnt too bad. extremely competitive. ill face slap your grandmother to win.

I rode offroad motorbikes and got a rush from 'close calls'. If it was forbidden/illegal i wanted in. I bought a slightly modified car and felt obligated to go out and do skids if it rained. It may be part to do with my parents being church ministers and my need to rebel.

eventually on what i like to call a death spiral during my uni years because I had alot of time on my hands and got bored easily - I would go to 2-3 classes out of 13 of the subject the pressure cram near the exam. I never failed any subjects - which i was pretty happy with considering the effort was putting in - but my marks suffered with a few 'close passes'

I got in trouble for a few things but away with a lot more. somehow later on rationalising some of the things i did on 'its supply and demand' and you got to take risk (fine/probation/jail) to make money.

Then i nearly got in trouble for something very serious - Jail Time - shook me out of it..sort of .. finished uni and i got a job in the finance industry.

I play poker as a hobby and am profitable at it overall. that said - I have had 'steam outs' chasing back short term losess. once i played 50 dollars heads up then 100 then 200 then 500. lets just say it didnt end well...

lately ive almost been feeling opposite to normal. ive lost contact with a few people and havn't gone out much.
i just need to do something other than numb the senses to stop the brain thinking too much.

so what am i?

also why do i do self destructing things when im bored or when im at rock bottom. i know i do it but its like watching a train wreck in slow motion unable to stop.

You're thoughts...

Carlos
 
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