[Grüßlimüsli]

Hello marshmellows.
I'm pretty overwhelmed by this introduction thingy, but I guess it's the best way to get in touch with like-minded people? I've been searching the internet for stuff all around INFPs and so I came across forums. And this was the one I found the most interesting. I have to say that I have spent hell a lot of time of my life on the internet (I'm 24) and so meeting people also happened a lot on here (on the internet). But most of the time it was just exhausting, unsatisfying, empty. There were a few opposites, guess that's why I always came back to all these chat communities (and the last years also dating websites.. hoping to find friends or drinking buddies xD mostly didn't work out either).
I'm a lonely ass fucker, eventhough I have some people in my life I guess. I have weird expectations/too high exp when it comes to friendship I guess. And you'll need to tell me that you don't hate me (and maybe that you really like me) regularly in order for me to contemplate that we might be friends lol. No, it's not your problem, it's mine.

When I'm depressed af, when people are just too much and I'm isolating myself for some weeks again, it's still nice to be in touch with people.. without having to move out of bed.. or without having to receive/perceive every slightest change in their facial expression or their way of talking etc. Blah. I just can't be that present ALL the time.

Maybe I'd like some kind of second world (lol, never played that game) online.
Where I can flee into without feeling like I'm not really living my life and all I'm doing is waiting and hoping and waiting and getting desillusioned and losing hope. So first hand I registered on this site to get in touch with peepz.
Not only INFPs. Fuck I hope I don't come across too clingy or desperate or whatever xD I'm fun! Really! Just not right now lol k bye

This hasn't really been an introduction so..
I'm currently living in germany. I'm full of blockades. I'm depressed. I love art, every kind of art (music, literature, theatre, visual arts). I hatelove people and they scare me. I'm a queer poc. If you're a narcissist, I'll expose you. Had that shit already, not going to happen a second time. Some people think I'm a domina lol. Some people think I'm miserable lol. I think too much about what other people (might) think. I'm scared of what happens when I'm oversharing with the wrong people.. and I'm oversharing. I could eat all day. To every opportunity. When I'm feeling empty, sad, bored, angry, as a skipped action (does that expression exist in english?), when I'm hungry, when I've got appetite.. food is everything and I hate it. Ph, I don't even know what to say about myself.
I have an instagram art account and I think it's dull and empty, just like my mood since some years.. so that's great. Guess I'm able to express myself lol. I'm not as negative as I might come across. Or maybe I am but I can take it with some humor and beer and weed. Fuck I'm hungry.

No, I'm not high. And I didn't drink beer. I'm on my period, and visiting my dad.. in the forest. And it's making me more lethargic and stuff but I'm trying my best. I don't even know.. I guess only depressed people could possibly be interested in speaking to me after this iNtRodUcTiOn. I don't know. Not going ti delete it, that's me atm.

Hellooo hit me up happy hippo! No. Listen to Siouxsie and the Banshees - Happy House and absorb the musicvideo! And her fancyness. And I started watching Mystery Science Theatre 3000, so if u .. ugh I don't know. If u fortuitously play hearthstone or mtga or if u LOVE Life is Strange hit me up. And if you're Chloe hit me up, too, bc I have a crush on you. Yay!

Bye

 

[VoicesofSpring]

Welcome, may you find a second home here ! Wish you good luck and strength fighting off the dark thoughts, I heard hot cocoa with marshmallows could be a good help.

See you around perC corner !

 

[Grüßlimüsli]

Chocolate is great, but I don't think it will help me with any of my struggles... hoewever. Thanks for showing up/answering ^-^

 

[tanstaafl28]

@Grüßlimüsli

WELCOME!

You sound like an amazing young adult with a diverse range of interests. How did you manage to come up with your username? I suspect it is a brand of cereal. I just love umlauts and eszetts...I'm something of a Germanophile. Wie gehts?

 

[Grüßlimüsli]

@Grüßlimüsli

WELCOME!

You sound like an amazing young adult with a diverse range of interests. How did you manage to come up with your username? I suspect it is a brand of cereal. I just love umlauts and eszetts...I'm something of a Germanophile. Wie gehts?

Thank you ^-^ Didn't think that would be the impression one would get from my introduction.
I like all sorts of rhymes (ok, especially the quirky ones) and I didn't want to use a username that I've already got on 763other pages bc I have a stalker.
So yeah. If you're a Germanophile and I'm a Rhymeophile: there you go - some german rhymes for you!
Can you translate them without aid?

Habedere Heidlbeere
Grüßli Müsli
Küsschen aufs Nüsschen
Bis später Peter
Max wenn du Wachsmasken magst, mach Wachsmasken
Der Kottbusser Postkutscher putzt den Kottbusser Postkutschkasten im Kottbusserpostkutschkastenputzamt.n

Ok, the last ones are tongue-twisters if that's even an existing english word.

 

[Grüßlimüsli]

Now I'm also curious about yours. Tan as tanned? Staafl could be a Name, like Stephan, Steff, just the bavrian way Staaaafl. Okay, that's not how you talk in Bavaria but it's my first association because of the words' elongated-ness (^^) But I'm sure it's something else. Maybe a code.

 

[tanstaafl28]

Now I'm also curious about yours. Tan as tanned? Staafl could be a Name, like Stephan, Steff, just the bavrian way Staaaafl. Okay, that's not how you talk in Bavaria but it's my first association because of the words' elongated-ness (^^) But I'm sure it's something else. Maybe a code.

Ich verstehe ein bisschen deutsch. I spent time in Frankfurt, Berlin, and Vienna. I have not made it to Bavaria. I also love a good dunkel bier. I just attended a local Oktoberfest here in the USA! I'm sure not as good as the one in Munich, but it's the best I can do for now.

As for my name:

There Ain't No Such Thing As A Free Lunch

TANSTAAFL

I first ran into it in a Science Fiction book, I wasn't aware at the time it had a broader historical origin.

The Moon is a Harsh Mistress - Robert A. Heinlein (If you like science-fiction with an intellectual twist, he's among the masters)

 

[MonarK]

@tanstaafl28 I came across it in economics. It's such a powerful axiom.
@Grüßlimüsli Welcome...or something.

 

[Grüßlimüsli]

Oh my gosh.. I guess I would only attend such thing if I was very drunk and high and if someone gave me money for going there. A lot of money. At least enough to pay my rent for one month. I dont really like Volksfeste, Dult or similarities to the Octoberfest.
The music is ugly, the people tend to be ugly or act like idiots.. but in certain tRadItIonAl clothing. I mean I love to numb parts of myself with alcohol, I love how alcohol can affect my mood from suicidal to I don't give a fuck. So I can understand a certain tendency of people excessively drinking, but WHY MUST THEY LISTEN TO THIS UGLY MUSIC and pay 15€ for a beer which would be 3,50€ with tips @ a bar or like 2€ at home I guess and drink at a place where there are so many people, you can't even move in your favourite/chosen speed. Not my thing.

Thanks for the Science Fiction book recommendation! I once was something like a bookworm, and now I'm just a human collecting hundreds of books that I haven't read yet. I'm going to put that one on my list. I like Science Fiction eventhough I'm not a specialist and haven't read/seen too much of it. But the title itself already sounds interesting.

Ok. I just realized that the lighter blue letters are actually links and that Heinlein must be something like a must know for ScienceFiction lovers.. He has created a ton! Definitely going to save him.

^-^

 

[tanstaafl28]

@Grüßlimüsli

I understand the commercialization of big events, especially ones that attract a great many tourists. I lived in Las Vegas for 17 years. I hardly ever went down to "The Strip" because it was too crowded and expensive. Plenty of cheaper alternatives away from the tourist areas. I'd much rather go to Munich when it isn't crowded and then get out into the countryside to look for those places that are "Off the beaten path."

I too have suffered with depression (and ADHD) all my life. It just seems "normal" to me. Over the last few months I had surgery and then I started walking a lot. Regular exercise has been so much better than any antidepressant I ever took! I walk about 8.8 km a day 5 days a week. I take one day off a week to rest, and then do about half on the other day.

I used to get a little crazy with the alcohol and other things when I was younger, and didn't understand myself so well. Now I still drink and partake in "other things," but just not as often. I try to make it an occasional treat. I'll watch a good movie, journal, read, listen to music, or just chill.

Yes, when you have been on here a while and get some more posts in, you'll be able to put links into your posts too. I'd be interested to see what your enneagram type is. That may give you some interesting insights into your psyche that MBTI cannot. At any rate, we're glad to have you here. I hope you get some positive and meaningful things out of your interactions! Let me know how I can be of assistance.

 

[StinkyBambi]

typical infp. such a nerd.

 

[tanstaafl28]

typical infp. such a nerd.

Nerds ROCK!

 

[Grüßlimüsli]

@tanstaafl

I enjoy reading you. So you've already been "of assistence" in means of positive interactions on perc for me.
Is "The Strip" a very popular Stripclub or a term for something else? I could google it. My second guess would have been some kind of boulevard, and that's what The Strip is. Okay, good to know. For me it's just inimaginable living in a place like Las Vegas or even Berlin (which is not really comparable to LV I think, but I don't even know. Of course you can compare anything to anything, so this is more of a phrase with certain meaning I'm using here. I even had a discussion with someone once, because I said a and b were not comparable eventhough that's what he just did: comparing a and b. And he got arrogannt and said: eeer, Grüßlimüsli, how dare you saing it's not possible comparing those two with eachother and assume me to know that, when you see that's exactly what I've done?! And then talking about logic and being entitling but whatever. I wanted to say that a and b are very different under a certain aspect and he could have guessed that, as the discussion was about veganism and he tried to tell me it would be the same to eat plants or animals lol. Whatever. Back to the topic!).

I just ask myself, how can e.g. introverted people with social anxieties even survive in such crowded places full of EVERYTHING?
I guess I'd like a very tall tree in every crowded and central place to be able to watch people but I don't want to be part of the turmoil.

You said depression (and ADHD) are normal to you. I guess I still have this dream in my head that depression can be cured and someday I will be the me, I want to be. Able of being happy and doing the stuff I want, able of feeling real passion for something. Motivated and driven by the things I love doing. Constantly creating, learning, doing stuff that makes me feel alive.
A friend once told me that for some people depression can never be cured, and that scares me. Also because if I would be one of those persons, that could mean that I will never be able to become the person I'd painfully want to be. How do you see that?
How do you cope with your depression in your everyday life? I mean you said there once was the numbing thing with alcohol and I guess that was a big part of it? And the walking and exercising thing started when you were able to exercise again after that surgery?
What did you do before then? Actually I hate reading "go out into the sun, do some sports" like that would cure any depression or like you're always able doing that stuff when you're really depressed. But hearing that from a person who are depressed themselves is something else. And I also know you are right. Because at the end of the day, even when I am depressed, I know I've done something that didn't happen in my bed in front of my Laptop. I can feel it in my body. Sleeping gets easier. Eating feels different. And I wouldn't have the feeling of ants in my veins because of too little exercise.

You walk 8.8km, is it a literal walk or do you do stuff like walking by foot instead of taking the subway to work for example?

Ah and the Enneagram thingy.. When I scrolled through the threads and posts I came across this thing. And it scared me. Because of numbers. They remind me of maths and when it comes to maths my brain just stops functioning lol.
But after 2 or 3 weeks I felt able googling it and then I made a test but I guess it was a scam,. because the site said it would send me my result in an email and then I gave them my email and all I got was like.. nothing. Nothing and something like an invitation to subscribe to stuff. But 2 days ago I did another try with a test in german. It sounded very quirky and like googletranslater did some work in there. That could have influenced the result but I tried my best.

It says 6w5 (13.9) | 5w6 (13.3) | 5w4 (12.1) | 6w7 (11.9)
Now that Ive written more than 15posts I can see your description.
The first seems to be your Enneagram/the ones you had the most % on (I'm sorry my english is blah but I just can't bother and I guess you understand me. So maybe I sound a little quirky but whatever). But what is it with the ILE, SLUEI and the Honorary INTJ.
There are so many extensions to the MB test. It's fascinating, and overwhelming.

 

[Grüßlimüsli]

@StinkyBambi

I don't even know what a literal nerd is. I had to google it. (I mean of course I have an image in my head when I hear that word and it's not totally new to me, but I didn't know what might have gotten you to the seemingly playful assumption infps would be nerds^^)
Nerds in the way the term is used seem to be "intellectual, obsessive, introverted or lacking social skills" (Wikipedia). Okay I'm introverted and lacking social skills, but that could also be due to mental illnesses and the fact that people are shitty, especially when you're a black little girl in a classroom full of white little brats lol. I had in mind that nerds have very specific interests that they put a huge amount of time into and that they are specialists in the specific topics themselves.
I don't have such thing, I don't even know anything. @tanstaafl makes a better nerd I guess, if he's a science fiction fan.
But that's also just a stereotype, isn't being interested in Science Fiction mainstream already and doesn't being a nerd include being interested in uncommon things? However.

 

[StinkyBambi]

@StinkyBambi

I don't even know what a literal nerd is. I had to google it. (I mean of course I have an image in my head when I hear that word and it's not totally new to me, but I didn't know what might have gotten you to the seemingly playful assumption infps would be nerds^^)
Nerds in the way the term is used seem to be "intellectual, obsessive, introverted or lacking social skills" (Wikipedia). Okay I'm introverted and lacking social skills, but that could also be due to mental illnesses and the fact that people are shitty, especially when you're a black little girl in a classroom full of white little brats lol. I had in mind that nerds have very specific interests that they put a huge amount of time into and that they are specialists in the specific topics themselves.
I don't have such thing, I don't even know anything. @tanstaafl makes a better nerd I guess, if he's a science fiction fan.
But that's also just a stereotype, isn't being interested in Science Fiction mainstream already and doesn't being a nerd include being interested in uncommon things? However.

right, okay. Thanks for the life story.