Personality Cafe banner

1 - 15 of 15 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,594 Posts
Discussion Starter #1
When it comes to honesty I agree with Jack:


I've been caught in lies and paid the consequences. I've also been strictly honest and open and paid consequences for that as well.

I've personally found the consequences for lying have ALWAYS been LESS than for speaking what is known or feared but that everyone seems to lack the testicular fortitude to say. People not only tolerate being lied to, they seem to require it. To lie is "human" while to speak truth is "brutal". Ever hear a lie called "brutal"?

Whistleblowers might be doing the right thing when they call out their employers for corruption or deception, but most of them find it very difficult to get work somewhere else afterwards. Why? Because no employer feels they can trust them. They have a record of speaking the truth.

And society at large seems to put the unvarnished truth in the same category as strict veganism, sobriety, and chastity before marriage: Nice ideals, but truly embraced in real life only by fringe quacks.

And this is in ENTP because I think most of y'all know what I'm talking about.

What do you think of honesty?
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,228 Posts
I'm with you.

I regard honesty as very important, but the world at large does rather seem to bank on it being necessary to put peoples' feelings first. Even when it is plain that there are those who cash in on this and hope not to be found out because people are not expected to tell uncomfortable truths....still society at large is more comfortable with...well, comfort, I suppose.

The only saving grace I can see out there is that I can accept that my perception of the truth may not always be the whole picture, and recognise that giving people the benefit of the doubt is also important.

This is probably why I am not carrying a billboard with "the end is nigh" painted on it for my living, I guess......:laughing:
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,753 Posts
I agree too.

I don't mind being honest, it doesn't phase me personally either way, to lie or tell the truth. That said, I always go with the option that will phase me less externally, which most often really is lying.
 
  • Like
Reactions: SlowPoke68

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,618 Posts
I speak the truth regardless. But I normally warn people not to ask me things they dont want to get answers to. I tell them that I can try to wriggle out of answering a question, but when pressed I will answer truthfully... It is their choice.


I DID tell you that I have been my own boss for the last 14 years, right?..:)
 
  • Like
Reactions: SlowPoke68

·
Banned
Joined
·
1,174 Posts
Honesty is for idiots.
Tell the truth only when you have no other choice.
 
  • Like
Reactions: SlowPoke68

·
Banned
Joined
·
998 Posts
Honestly? Sorry couldn't help that.

If I make a promise I keep it. Otherwise I have no problem telling small lies to get myself out of small tedious tasks. If people ask my opinion about something I tell it to them truthfully. If someone asks me a "why" question they usually get the truth. For example the dental hygenist asked me why I don't floss regularly. She looked shocked when I told her "Because I'm lazy."

When you lie about big things it only comes back to bite you in the ass later. Lying about small things such as "Did you walk the dog?" I'lldo. For that question I'll answer yes, when in reality I let her shit in the garden.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
49 Posts
I am so thankful for this forum. Here I can feel I am actually quite normal.

On the other hand I respect the Bible and my favorite passage is "Do not give dogs what is sacred; do not throw your pearls to pigs. If you do, they may trample them under their feet, and then turn and tear you to pieces." So often I do not tell the truth to "regular" people, only when they ask me, and I warn them beforehand (as ENTPreneur said). And sometimes I do tell the truth just because I want to see their reactions, e.g. like YourMum confessing being lazy to floss his teeth. Telling the truth can be amusing but I am cautious not to hurt or humiliate people by it. Even shocking them should be thoroughly considered because it is not always resepectful. Oh, it is difficult to live among slow people :dry:
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
722 Posts
I think that honesty is a quality to be admired but I can't say that i'm always honest. I don't make it a point to lie but certain situations come up where it's just alot easier to lie. Especially when you know the person won't know what to do with the truth in a situation. I still don't like lying in those situations but I get over it quickly because it was the easier route.

I think it's okay to lie if someone get's too personal though and not answering would imply the answer.

Honesty is great in theory but people just can't seem to accept the truth in alot of situations. On the surface everyone acts like they value the truth so much but few truly are appreciative of it and instead react negatively to it when they don't hear what they hoped for.

Try telling a person with self-esteem issues that they're fat when they ask you if they are...try telling someone that you only prefer to be around them in small doses...try telling someone that you'd rather just sit at home and do nothing as opposed to hanging out with them...try telling someone that you aren't interested in their ideas at all...are the reactions really worth it when a lie can be told that makes both parties happy?
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,618 Posts
I think that honesty is a quality to be admired but I can't say that i'm always honest. I don't make it a point to lie but certain situations come up where it's just alot easier to lie. Especially when you know the person won't know what to do with the truth in a situation. I still don't like lying in those situations but I get over it quickly because it was the easier route.

I think it's okay to lie if someone get's too personal though and not answering would imply the answer.

Honesty is great in theory but people just can't seem to accept the truth in alot of situations. On the surface everyone acts like they value the truth so much but few truly are appreciative of it and instead react negatively to it when they don't hear what they hoped for.

Try telling a person with self-esteem issues that they're fat when they ask you if they are...try telling someone that you only prefer to be around them in small doses...try telling someone that you'd rather just sit at home and do nothing as opposed to hanging out with them...try telling someone that you aren't interested in their ideas at all...are the reactions really worth it when a lie can be told that makes both parties happy?
I dont tell these "truths" unless they push me. There are also several ways of telling the truth, some kinder than others. Semantics....
 
  • Like
Reactions: SlowPoke68

·
Registered
Joined
·
722 Posts
I dont tell these "truths" unless they push me. There are also several ways of telling the truth, some kinder than others. Semantics....
If it's the right situation or person then sure i'll tell them the truth. But I don't recall many times when it has been...make me angry though and the truth, as I see it, will fly out faster than it can even be perceived hahaha.

Seems to me that there is a nice way of telling the truth and then theres the blunt unfiltered way. Both are likely to get reactions that aren't worth it for me with the latter getting the worst reaction obviously.

I will add though that I can't stand bad liars. You might as well then just be honest if your not even gonna put effort into it...It's funny though. Because I understand how I feel about other people and what not at times I could handle the truth moreso than most people would be able to and therefore I hate when other's are dishonest but then I do the same...although I guess at the same time I can get over dishonesty as long as it wasn't something major and wasn't intended to harm me.

Honesty is a funny thing.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,618 Posts
I do tell the truth for my own sake too:
It is easier, not a web of lies that I need to remember.

I can also stand a lie aimed at me when it is done to save my feelings, or not meant to do harm. I normally say that I know their lie, but can appreciate the good intentions....
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
145 Posts
I tell the truth when it counts...friends, family, forums and to people that need to hear it.

However, when it comes to work...I tell them what they want to hear, because they can't handle the truth. They can't handle knowing that their fantasyland HR policies are total bullshit and that people are unhappy regardless of what their surveys and benchmarks indicate. It's like SlowPoke said, they will punish you for telling it like it is and reward you for comforting them with lies.

It's a sad world we live in...
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
722 Posts
I do tell the truth for my own sake too:
It is easier, not a web of lies that I need to remember.

I can also stand a lie aimed at me when it is done to save my feelings, or not meant to do harm. I normally say that I know their lie, but can appreciate the good intentions....
That's also another thing. If lying is going to be harder than the truth then i'll just tell the truth. If there's some kind of web of lies that I have to keep up with in the future then I won't even bother.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,618 Posts
I actually seem to radiate honesty. I guess that has to do with my utter frankness. Dating and business associates: I often hear that they feel safe and comfortable with me. But I bet the victims said that about Dahmer too....

On a sidenote: CEOs and other "bigshot" corporates are VERY uneasy around me. I believe that they are unused to someone talking to them as equals and with no mask on. And who sees through theirs. So while "normal" people like me for this trait, some "leader"-types avoid me because of it.

I almost always have good intentions about everyone. If I do not, they will know, no doubt about it. I am as honest in that aspect too...
 
  • Like
Reactions: SlowPoke68
1 - 15 of 15 Posts
Top