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Discussion Starter #1
I was reading some posts about what other types think of us in relationships and I kept hearing “If their Fi is good...then...”. “If their Fi is wonderful then.... but check their Fi first!
Alright me ‘Maties....How’s your Fi?
Lol!
 
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I was reading some posts about what other types think of us in relationships and I kept hearing “If their Fi is good...then...”. “If their Fi is wonderful then.... but check their Fi first!
Alright me ‘Maties....How’s your Fi?
Lol!
My Fi is sad and feels sick because it detects lots of disharmony, inhumanity and depravity in environment, so it works well.
 

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Discussion Starter #3 (Edited)
I don't know what a "good" Fi is, just am I happy with my life and myself. The authenticity part is a given. I think if we asked each ENFP if they had to fight for their authenticity and Fi, I think we would each hear stories from our teenage and young adult years. I still hear some of you still fighting. I mean, I still have a few of these battles, as they come up (Darn ESTJs lol)

The gushing essay:

So I think this is a THING. What if everyone followed my Fi? Or what if everyone had to deal with my Fi? Would the world be a better place or would it be messed up?
Would I still be following my Fi in pretty much any culture? Yes! And it's almost like it isn't a choice. The choice part of it I see some of the other types understand about Fi and some don't so much.
I either follow my Fi and try to turn the world around me into something that my Fi accepts as good OR I'm compromising all my morals and would be horribly miserable. I can't DO miserable for long, I'd rather risk it all. Yes, I think I know this about me. This is not so for my INFP husband, his morals differ just a bit from mine, but I know for sure I would have been killed in Nazi Germany for anti-Hitler propaganda.
I watch all these movies that have to do with people sticking to their guns no matter what, and these are the movies I highly identify with. "A Man For All Seasons". "The Armistad" "Das Schreckliche Madchen" "The White Rose" "Flame og Citrone" and the last two are about people who can't tolerate the Nazis any more. They HAVE to do what they feel is right. I feel this way about the Underground Polish army too, like do or die we can't take this anymore! Or slave revolts! These are the movies I most identify with. Actually, "A Woman in Berlin" is my favorite book-- there are pieces of it too that are strong Fi, she can't stand to be controlled by fear any longer!
Also this is why so many of us have stories about winning independence from our parents-- we struggle with dealing with our love and obligations to them, but we want to go live life authentically in accordance with our Fi and we usually always encourage others to live in authenticity with theirs.
I actually am very grateful for the INFJ's forum's understanding of this, it gave me more perspective and it was kind of like: YES! I have my own moral compass! It is it's own world and it's morals are either beautiful, happy, pure and this is why we can all compare our thinking (our Fi's actually) and learn so much from each other as ENFPs because we each have built this personal highly sophisticated yet pure world of right and wrong. How we did it, I don't know. I mean I look at my kids, a Fi and a Ti and I know I hardly have to worry about them being influenced by anything or anyone. I am still mothering, but it's usually over-kill. They already want to do what they feel is right. And it explains why I married my INFP husband-- not some OTHER INFP guy, but MY INFP guy who when I met him I felt I had found someone who understood me so well--- it's because our morals are pretty close to the same. Our world view only needed slight adjustments, same religious beliefs, etc. So close that I at first the thought crossed my mind that he might be a sociopath lol! He's far from. Anyway, how the INFJs put it works for me. Checking my Fi
Long essay, but I've been thinking about this for a while.

@ Arzazar.. now to only figure out how to build the world around you to match the beauty and sensitivity within. I believe this is possible for you and everyone. =)
 

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Mine's iffy.

It's nice, but kind of emotionally withdrawn. I loop a lot to pursue competence and respect rather than an emotional bond. :p
 

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I think my Fi is the biggest factor in my inner strength at any phase in time. If things in my world, most especially my relationships with people, align with my Fi- I tend to find that everything else just lines into place with consummate ease, as if I were born to find life easy as hell. I think it's because Fi is my hardest function to appease. My other functions automatically start operating at their peak, and I'm "at my best".

Even Ne, as an Ne-dom, is far less influentual in this respect. Ne can get me amped up, productive and engaged- but I need that consistency baseline that Fi-satisfaction gives me to really reach that next-level. Ne is just ever-constant, like breathing air.

The ultimate though is when both my Ne and Fi align- then I become an unstoppable juggernaut of human nature. I feel like I can have whatever I want- in many ways most of my motivations for my decisons and behaviours are informed by trying to achieve this state as often as possible in my life. By far the most complex problem I tackle in life, I've basically been conscious about this struggle for about a decade. The best description of this I've found are the descriptions of enneagram "levels" (you know- from 1-9, where 1 is perfection, and 9 is extremely destructive).

Te is the function I turn to in order to colour in the gaps. If Ne and Fi are firing, I don't need to worry, I just relax and go for the ride, but Te picks up the slack when that does not happen. I remember when I was younger without a developed Te, if Ne and Fi did not connect to my environment, I found it much harder to have a plan B- as I've matured Te has become that plan B- a very secure safety net in case things don't turn out the way I would like.
 
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@ Arzazar.. now to only figure out how to build the world around you to match the beauty and sensitivity within. I believe this is possible for you and everyone. =)
It's not possible because vast majority of people are sick, evil monsters, completely devoid of humanity.

I'm pretty much done. Just struggling with trying to learn programming now.

I wrote down my story here. It begins in the bottom.

Here is how studying is going for me.
 

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I'm pretty certain this is the healthiest my Fi has ever been. I find my emotional stability gains strength the older I become. This might be my Te strengthening. My Ne will always be dominate but I think now I've reached that stage where I can recognize and like my Fi. When I was younger I would always worry about how I came off to society or how my personality would ultimately crash with my mother. After my father's death I just gained a clarity that you should just love yourself and let the chips fall where they place down. I still strive to better my personality but this is the first set of years I've been enjoying my life and appreciate who I've become. It's the first couple of years I shrug off someone who doesn't fit and go about my merry way. I think what really helped was learning about the MBTI and other people's personalities. Also knowing I wasn't alone in the world. That loosing items left in right was just an ENFP quality that I can laugh about now with my husband when he finds my phone in the freezer. I guess I just don't sweat the small stuff anymore. I'm still shy but now I recognize that being shy about my emotions is not necessarily a bad thing. Society will always have waves and movements about what fits and what is acceptable. I can't beat myself up if I'm not the current flavor. I just now seem to have a lighter step and more of a smile on my face.

 

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I think my Fi is the biggest factor in my inner strength at any phase in time. If things in my world, most especially my relationships with people, align with my Fi- I tend to find that everything else just lines into place with consummate ease, as if I were born to find life easy as hell. I think it's because Fi is my hardest function to appease. My other functions automatically start operating at their peak, and I'm "at my best".

Even Ne, as an Ne-dom, is far less influentual in this respect. Ne can get me amped up, productive and engaged- but I need that consistency baseline that Fi-satisfaction gives me to really reach that next-level. Ne is just ever-constant, like breathing air.

The ultimate though is when both my Ne and Fi align- then I become an unstoppable juggernaut of human nature. I feel like I can have whatever I want- in many ways most of my motivations for my decisons and behaviours are informed by trying to achieve this state as often as possible in my life. By far the most complex problem I tackle in life, I've basically been conscious about this struggle for about a decade. The best description of this I've found are the descriptions of enneagram "levels" (you know- from 1-9, where 1 is perfection, and 9 is extremely destructive).

Te is the function I turn to in order to colour in the gaps. If Ne and Fi are firing, I don't need to worry, I just relax and go for the ride, but Te picks up the slack when that does not happen. I remember when I was younger without a developed Te, if Ne and Fi did not connect to my environment, I found it much harder to have a plan B- as I've matured Te has become that plan B- a very secure safety net in case things don't turn out the way I would like.
This really mapped out and gave me perspective to how I operate. I needed to see this. Thank you sir.
 

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Discussion Starter #9
It's not possible because vast majority of people are sick, evil monsters, completely devoid of humanity.

I'm pretty much done. Just struggling with trying to learn programming now.

I wrote down my story here. It begins in the bottom.

Here is how studying is going for me.
I went to your website. Have you found anything that helps you? Like reading books that fit with your Fi or anything?

I'm pretty proud of all of us who have posted, us figuring out our life and our happiness and basically our Fi lol
 

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Tried and tested, but invisible and unstable. Outta sight outta mind, right?

Procastination is at an all-time high, deadlines are the enemy. Te says Do Work or Fail, and Ne says You Can Do This, Its Easy, but Fi says There Will Always Be Time. There never is enough time.

Lost a friend of about 2 months due to some consecutive mistakes, Fi's really taking a beating. I want to reach out and try to fix it like I usually do when things go wrong, but of course Ne sticks it's arm out in front of me, telling me it's not gonna work out. Live and let die I suppose. No rest for the wicked..

Conveniently, a new friend, who I have yet to actually meet with and chat face-to-face with, has reached out to me over social media. I started the initial conversation of course but it took off from there. She tested IXTX (results were 50/50 on the X) and it's an interesting dynamic. Of course I do the leading of the conversation and spawning new topics. It's tiring. However, a recent chapter has closed so I suppose this is a new one with the new friend? Hopefully.

That recently earlier realization and re-evaluation of my entire childhood/adolescence abuse has been taking a toll as well, but it's more of a recurring thought in the back of my mind rather than something I adamantly focus on. It does trigger these sort of "quiet periods" though. I'd say I'd need some time to think on it, but of course, there's never enough. :proud:
 
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I went to your website. Have you found anything that helps you? Like reading books that fit with your Fi or anything?
Being among good and supportive people and being safe. Doesn't happen, though.

I managed to read one book pretty quickly - a Warhammer 40k book. It was very dark, though.
 

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So what do these people mean when they are talking about an ENFPs Fi? What are they looking out for? What does an ENFP look like with weak Fi?

I mean my Fi has always been here ever since I was a child. The only times I would consider it 'weak' is if I'm stuck in a loop or utilising it in combination with my weaker functions.

I wonder if the people asking these questions are Fe/Ti users. If that's the case do they consider Fi clashes with them to be a sign of weak Fi? Does developed Fi bend and adapt to others to avoid confrontation with other judging functions?

If stubborn Fi ideals are considered immature Fi then I've got that. Not that I consider that an element of weakness to my personality.

Currently I feel like my Fi might be a little muted than normal. It's just easier to deal with Te right now instead of analysing my feelings towards things. But this is a state of flux. If someone were to judge my Fi at this moment that would be unfair because they just can't see it.
 

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Discussion Starter #14 (Edited)
So what do these people mean when they are talking about an ENFPs Fi? What are they looking out for? What does an ENFP look like with weak Fi?

I mean my Fi has always been here ever since I was a child. The only times I would consider it 'weak' is if I'm stuck in a loop or utilising it in combination with my weaker functions.

I wonder if the people asking these questions are Fe/Ti users. If that's the case do they consider Fi clashes with them to be a sign of weak Fi? Does developed Fi bend and adapt to others to avoid confrontation with other judging functions?

If stubborn Fi ideals are considered immature Fi then I've got that. Not that I consider that an element of weakness to my personality.

Currently I feel like my Fi might be a little muted than normal. It's just easier to deal with Te right now instead of analysing my feelings towards things. But this is a state of flux. If someone were to judge my Fi at this moment that would be unfair because they just can't see it.
Awesome question. What do they mean?

My personal thought is that they know they can’t change our Fi, so is our Fi (our personal moral code and ideal of how people should love?) compatible with their chosen morals and way of life. I kind of thought this was a great thing for them to understand and made me understand myself better too. They didn’t use the word “weak”. They used the words “good” and “wonderful” or not— like just “yuk!”

And since I’m married to my INFP husband who this is even a bit MORE true for, then yeah... like is his personal Fi world going to fit with mine? Ours DOES fit and if it doesn’t we both are super stubborn and pretty much our relationship would not work at all if this happened a lot. We would end every argument with “You don’t love me or understand me at all. You don’t choose to do the right thing!” LOL! Luckily his Fi fits in my opinion, morals of a high standard of absolutely no controlling-ness. He would never control me or anyone. No manipulation. His Fi gets stuck often in depression, but I’ve learned to work through this too. My INFP sister does not have a Fi that would be compatible with mine if I were choosing a friend or partner. (of course I love my sister, but she is scary) She’s highly manipulative and her Fi personal world view is prone to anger and some revenge type stuff. But she’s the only one who could ever change her Fi. My Fi scans my environment not just for the bad but definitely I look for the good, the happy. If this is the heart of it— looking for the good, trying to see and build bridges, trusting life’s journey, then my Fi is healthier than its ever been!

I got this from the INFJs— please know I really loved their conversation about it and it did help me understand myself in relation to others better.
 

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I think people view me as very open-minded, warm and tolerant person ... until I start to care for them and I would like them to accept the deeper (and darker) sides of me as well. Sometimes they then end up resenting me a little for being judgemental, harsh, insensitive, etc. (of course that depends on the subject, and in the end everyone has different values). However, this happens mostly with for example INFPs, INFJs, some INTPs, ENTPs, ISFPs, ESFPs(?).

I think Fi combined with stronger Te can be really intimidating and unattractive maybe, but then again the types that end up liking me for it (or are indifferent towards it) in my experience are for example ESTJs, ISTJs, ENTJs, INTJs, ISFJs, ESFJs, ISTPs, ESTPs. I wonder about ENFJs, even though they lead with Fe, oftentimes I find them to be very blunt as well and show ''like it or leave it''-kind of attitudes. I can't really read them.

As for other ENFPs, I have yet to see :p - I was raised by a slightly paranoid ESTJ and with religious background. I have rebelled against most of that but surely part of it got ingrained into me. You can't escape the influences of your direct environment and (group)cultures. In part it forms and shapes you, not always for the better sadly. Fi CAN be adjusted, but it takes a lot of time and effort and willpower. Between now and 5 years ago I feel like I became a complete new person. That is, a person with a very different set of values (or re-aligned as to how important certain values are). As a result I feel incredibly liberated! Furthermore I feel so much more able to be more open-minded, warm, tolerant, accepting. It also helps immensely in fighting off the melancholic side of Fi that only see gloom and doom that is present in our societies. It helps so much in feeling generally more upbeat and i'm less affected by what others do, say or think. Apart from all that, I haven't lost my complete touch of Fi, there's also beautiful sides to melancholy - and Fi is so much more than melancholy alone of course. This is just one side of things.

My Fi nowadays is not so strong, I can't really place it or express it, when all I need to do right now is to make sure to get practicalities in life set up and arranged well for myself. The only one responsible for that and the outcomes is me. I've read an older post of another ENFP that was about my age at the time, saying that their Te was overtaking their Fi because life demanded so, also part of the transitioning-phase into adulthood and towards entirely sustaining oneself.

Fi takes a lot of energy and focus, up until last week my life was too busy to have time for that. Going into Fi-mode while being interrupted by others is highly annoying. I like to travel, I can sit for hours and hours on the train and stare out the window and listen to music. My feels and thoughts go everywhere.
 

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Currently I feel like my Fi might be a little muted than normal. It's just easier to deal with Te right now instead of analysing my feelings towards things. But this is a state of flux. If someone were to judge my Fi at this moment that would be unfair because they just can't see it.
Maybe this is exactly what the OP meant. I am right there with you, btw. My Fi is super muted. Not only is Te much more conducive to getting things done, but my enneagram 7 is all like "NO TIME FOR THE FEELS".
 

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Maybe this is exactly what the OP meant. I am right there with you, btw. My Fi is super muted. Not only is Te much more conducive to getting things done, but my enneagram 7 is all like "NO TIME FOR THE FEELS".
Yup, the curse of being ennaegram seven.
 

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What sort of Jungian animal totem would you use to personify Fi? How about a bunneh?
:kitteh:
 
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