Personality Cafe banner

1 - 18 of 18 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
966 Posts
Discussion Starter #1
It's debatable whether ENTPs are generally the most arrogant type (whether consciously arrogant or not) but I think the difference lies in how they show it and how much of it they actually show.

In my head, I'm extremely arrogant to the point where you I'm probably a narcissist mentally. But I don't really show my arrogance much. I only do when I'm comfortable with the people I'm with. I never do it with people I don't know very well because arrogance tends to leave a bad impression and I like to make people feel comfortable when I meet them, so I'll usually be very modest.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
636 Posts
Hmm. How to explain. I tend to believe in multiple intelligences and that everyone has thier own thing that they are good at. There just isn't enough time in the world for someone to be the best at everything so people typically specialize but what specailization is "better" is more of a matter of preference. If they dont specialize they end up sort of ok at everything but not the best. In the end we are human. Just average humans. Nobody is a specail snowflake in my book, including myself.

With that said tho, I know what I'm good at and I'm not shy about it. So yeah. I come across as an arrogant ass. I try to ease the blow a bit. Sometimes it works and sometimes it doesnt. Other times i figure its not my job to nurse thier egos.

Basically I dont ever think im greater than someone else as a whole but I do consider myself better in certain situations. But I always like me more than eveyone else. I assume others like themselves more than other people as well though I know that is not always reality.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,940 Posts
Arrogance to me has to do with being boastful about how great/intelligent you are. I actually do not think that ENTPs try to do that. However, I think we unintentionally do that by proxy of having our stuff noticed. Even as a kid, I would not show what I got on a test if it was awesome or even show it to my parents. However, I found by virtue of being noticed more, I tended to get called out for something I did well more often than the quiet kid in the corner who might have done the same. I actually am uncomfortable with beating people or being the "best" usually because it makes someone else feel bad in the process.

As far as intelligence goes, I think that also is perception. Our mind works quick so when we are on an idea, we tend to leave people in the dust with us assuming they are understanding what we are saying. The issue usually lies in our lack of decent explanation of what is in our head, not the other person but I think it makes the other person feel like we think they are stupid (which we might be thinking). Also, we tend to sound like we know what we are talking about (and often we do because we have such diverse knowledge base-jack of all trades, master of none) so again, sometime when someone says something that is inheriently incorrect, we have a very hard time just letting it go. I think ENTPs tend to go crazy when people are using mis-information so we make sure they know the correct information which usually again makes them feel stupid. The thing is, while someone might not have a lot of information on subject, I never really feel like they are stupid, just un-informed which can be easily remedied. They usually have a lot more knowledge or understanding of another topic or area that I don't.

In my experience xNTJs are significantly more arrogant. They seem to get pleasure of beating people or being the best. My mom jokes about my INTJ dad that is "he is not a sore loser if he loses but is much more an obnoxious winner when he wins".
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,420 Posts
In my experience xNTJs are significantly more arrogant. They seem to get pleasure of beating people or being the best. My mom jokes about my INTJ dad that is "he is not a sore loser if he loses but is much more an obnoxious winner when he wins".
I was about to say the same thing. INTJs don't get as much credit because they tend to speak less than us, but sometimes arrogance can simply be shown in the way they look at the rest.


Also, to me, arrogance has more to do with how you see the rest rather than how you see yourself. As in:

 

·
Registered
Joined
·
9 Posts
As said before, I do my best to hide my arrogance when around people I don't know or in work related situations. But in my head I'm a fullblown narcissist.

If I for some reason find myself in an extremely boring and unstimulating company I do tend to let my arrogance flow free. This is something I'm working on, it tend to hurt people when u are blunt. Without u noticing.

And on another note, it's not hard to be the best when everyone else are idiots. Like said before, I don't see myself as a god or something. But the standard today is very low.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
445 Posts
Differentiate arrogance from entitlement and you have your answer. I am arrogant in a very humble way, I have a half assed plan, convince people to come along and get lost halfway because I didn;t charge my phones battery for GPS. People will say that was really stupid and I believe that was the point of it :D
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
4,442 Posts
I don't think I'm arrogant in the least, but I've grown to realize that perhaps I can come across as arrogant to others. I think because I look at things very objectively, matter of factly, and I'm not afraid to share any idea I might have and I'm not afraid to be wrong and will defend any opinion i have and love to debate, I'm not afraid to share ideas and argue in favor of any idea... and to others maybe that come across as arrogance, but it's not because there is no sense of superiority or self-righteousness or stubbornness in it ... it's just a matter of looking at everything rather objectively.. and it's really only from learning about mbti and reflecting on some comments a few people have made that I've even become aware that people perhaps might see me as arrogant. ..Hopefully though if they spend time with me they will see that's just how i talk and act, and that i'm quick to admit when I've realized I'm wrong, i'm not narcissistic, can be quite self-depricating,, will admittedly act and think stupid things and acknowledge the things I say are stupid, etc. ..so hopefully people who see my willingness and eagerness to argue and defend any point and share any idea and misjudge it as arrogance, if they spend time with me come to see that it's not actually arrogance, that's just how I behave and talk/communicate. .... I don't know though how much others even view me as arrogant or such. lol I feel like the type of person who would view me as arrogant is also the type of person who would share that opinion. I feel like it's largely a matter of just extrovert vs. introvert and how we can sometimes come across to each other because of our different modes of operating.


From the outside it could look like I always think i'm right because I'm not afraid to and am eager to share and argue and defend any idea... but I don't think it's arrogance because it's not a matter of believing I'm right, but rather just not ever being afraid to be wrong. ..and needing to externally share and discuss and debate ideas in order for me to develop them and form opinions...to someone who doesn't do that it might seem like i'm sharing and debating ideas because I'm insistent on always being right.. if they are someone who would only share and debate ideas if they were confident they were right. (the kind of person who thinks the point of debating ideas is to win an argument.. i just see as a fun playful discussion). To me people who get butt hurt by debates are like people who you can't wrestle and play contact sports with...just no fun to play with.
 

·
Registered
ENTP
Joined
·
3,256 Posts
I think the internal monologue/internal parallel world of feelings and thoughts that isn't being expressed is the root of this, as is very common with inferior Fe types, and it points more to antisocial tendencies rather than narcissism. It varies in degree too, from mild "you all suck" moments to avoiding people and having difficulty connecting because no one's good enough.. The less you expose your unedited self the more these intensify and isolate you.
 

·
Banned
Joined
·
8,873 Posts
Well, it doesn't show. The moment i felt someone got offended on me, well. *Humble kind irresistible self mode on.*
 

·
Grumpy old bastard
Joined
·
10,085 Posts
I'm pretty confident. Arrogance is ok, I don't like pompous.
 
  • Like
Reactions: al3ms

·
Beer Guardian
ENTP 5w6 So/Sx 584 ILE Honorary INTJ
Joined
·
16,582 Posts
It's a maturity thing. When I was young and inexperienced, I came off as arrogant, cocky, and generally got knocked on my ass a lot for it. As I became more wise, I realized I didn't need to show off to be witty, charming, and generally fun to be around. I could be confident without being cocky. I could stand up for myself without standing out.
 

·
Registered
ENTP 8w7 sx/so
Joined
·
965 Posts
However, I think we unintentionally do that by proxy of having our stuff noticed. Even as a kid, I would not show what I got on a test if it was awesome or even show it to my parents. However, I found by virtue of being noticed more, I tended to get called out for something I did well more often than the quiet kid in the corner who might have done the same. I actually am uncomfortable with beating people or being the "best" usually because it makes someone else feel bad in the process.

As far as intelligence goes, I think that also is perception. Our mind works quick so when we are on an idea, we tend to leave people in the dust with us assuming they are understanding what we are saying. The issue usually lies in our lack of decent explanation of what is in our head, not the other person but I think it makes the other person feel like we think they are stupid (which we might be thinking). Also, we tend to sound like we know what we are talking about (and often we do because we have such diverse knowledge base-jack of all trades, master of none) so again, sometime when someone says something that is inheriently incorrect, we have a very hard time just letting it go. I think ENTPs tend to go crazy when people are using mis-information so we make sure they know the correct information which usually again makes them feel stupid. The thing is, while someone might not have a lot of information on subject, I never really feel like they are stupid, just un-informed which can be easily remedied. They usually have a lot more knowledge or understanding of another topic or area that I don't.
I think this is true - the proxy argument represents this well. Also being argumentative as we want to make things better if we see an easy way to do it or correct mis-information, it makes it seem like we are "know-it-alls" especially at a young age, and aren't intimidated to correct a superior or adult, which seems like arrogance as usually this would cow someone else.

I don't think I'm arrogant in the least, but I've grown to realize that perhaps I can come across as arrogant to others. I think because I look at things very objectively, matter of factly, and I'm not afraid to share any idea I might have and I'm not afraid to be wrong and will defend any opinion i have and love to debate, I'm not afraid to share ideas and argue in favor of any idea... and to others maybe that come across as arrogance, but it's not because there is no sense of superiority or self-righteousness or stubbornness in it ... it's just a matter of looking at everything rather objectively.. and it's really only from learning about mbti and reflecting on some comments a few people have made that I've even become aware that people perhaps might see me as arrogant. ..Hopefully though if they spend time with me they will see that's just how i talk and act, and that i'm quick to admit when I've realized I'm wrong, i'm not narcissistic, can be quite self-depricating,, will admittedly act and think stupid things and acknowledge the things I say are stupid, etc. ..so hopefully people who see my willingness and eagerness to argue and defend any point and share any idea and misjudge it as arrogance, if they spend time with me come to see that it's not actually arrogance, that's just how I behave and talk/communicate. .... I don't know though how much others even view me as arrogant or such. lol I feel like the type of person who would view me as arrogant is also the type of person who would share that opinion. I feel like it's largely a matter of just extrovert vs. introvert and how we can sometimes come across to each other because of our different modes of operating.

From the outside it could look like I always think i'm right because I'm not afraid to and am eager to share and argue and defend any idea... but I don't think it's arrogance because it's not a matter of believing I'm right, but rather just not ever being afraid to be wrong. ..and needing to externally share and discuss and debate ideas in order for me to develop them and form opinions...to someone who doesn't do that it might seem like i'm sharing and debating ideas because I'm insistent on always being right.. if they are someone who would only share and debate ideas if they were confident they were right. (the kind of person who thinks the point of debating ideas is to win an argument.. i just see as a fun playful discussion). To me people who get butt hurt by debates are like people who you can't wrestle and play contact sports with...just no fun to play with.
I think this really explains a lot of why we seem arrogant as ENTPs. I know I have seemed that way in the past, and it surprised me, but when it was pointed out (I have also been accused of being intimidating), I saw it. Because I have no problem with people disagreeing with me or not liking my opinions, and because I also am pretty sure I am right if I volunteer something, I am free with opinions and advice. I also like to share information. Some people like this, many feel intimidated and resent this and think I am being arrogant, or just don't respond well to my communication style. I am just excited about ideas, and if someone was acting the same way I would have no problem with it.

I recently had a 4 hour conversation with an ENTJ who argued with me and knew so much and I was like "Oh my God, I might have met someone smarter than me - that is amazing!, and it didn't bother me at all. I didn't think he was arrogant, because he was really well informed. But I think people would have thought he was arrogant if they were more emotional or not as well informed. For me, I was like - where is that red sapiosexual button? Bam! And I don't like arrogant people, but I guess that is usually because I interpret arrogance as people who are proud of an attribute to a degree that outstrips the quality of that attribute or their personal worth (yes, subjective). E.g. someone who thinks they are very smart but are in actuality a dullard, or someone who thinks they are really hot but are pretty much a loser, etc.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
4,442 Posts
I interpret arrogance as people who are proud of an attribute to a degree that outstrips the quality of that attribute or their personal worth (yes, subjective). E.g. someone who thinks they are very smart but are in actuality a dullard, or someone who thinks they are really hot but are pretty much a loser, etc.
I don't think someone has to be delusional about their intelligence and knowledge to be arrogant, someone who's arrogant can indeed be the smartest most knowledgeable person in the room.. i don't think it has to do w/ how intelligent or knowledgable someone is, but whether or not they see their intelligence and knowledge as superior to others and act condescendingly towards others. The character House I think is a good example of someone who's arrogant and has the intelligence to go w/ it. I think most people I encounter who are arrogant are very intelligent and knowledgeable, it's not an issue of them not being intelligent, but being close-minded stubborn and a rude asshole to others. .. with that said, I think T thinkers and esp entps can come off as arrogant also because we can be rudely straightforward in sharing stuff, and it's not necessarily that we disrespect other people's opinions (as an arrogant person would) but that we don't see the emotional harm in bluntly sharing an alternative opinion. We might act like a rude asshole not because we'r arrogant, but just because we're a rude asshole :p
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
4,442 Posts
I feel like having a good memory must be a prerequisite for being arrogant.


I'm pretty intelligent when it comes to rather philosophical big picture things, understanding things like economics and political theory and such and it makes me feel like the vast majority of people are incredibly dumb for not seeing such significant things that appear simple to me and having beliefs that appear dumb to me.... but then I forget lots of things and do stupid shit, I only got Bs in school, I forget people's names, I suck at trivia games, I'll drive away w/ a cup of coffee sitting ontop of my car... there's endless things throughout the day that show to me that other people are much more intelligent than me in many ways. ..so even if I am above average in certain aspects of intelligence, I'm not at all in others.. I wonder if arrogant people must not encounter those daily reminders of their own stupidity like I get or if they're just delusion ally narcissistic ... I would guess some are delusion ally narcissistic like Trump, but I feel like prob a lot of people who are arrogant, just have good memories and confuse that for general intelligence and don't encounter forgetting things and doing stupid things as much as the rest of us that would know their ego down a notch like the rest of us.

There was a guy winning on jeopardy the other week and he came across as a pretentious arrogant asshole (didn't watch that much of him, but saw part where he wasted a large portion of his moment in the spotlight pretentiously shitting on other people's taste in music talking about how he went to a concert of a band he didn't like and was an ass to the other concert goers..like why did he go to that concert and why is sharing this story? just to shit on other people's taste in music?) ..that guy obviously has a phenomenal memory and I feel like perhaps its common that people w/ exceptional memory confuse that w/ general intelligence (obv it is a big part of intelligence tho) and are more prone to become arrogant, whereas people who are intelligent in other ways such as perhaps being phenomenal at math or linguistics, but bad at memory get constant reminders of their stupidity that knock their ego down a notch.
 

·
Registered
ENTP 8w7 sx/so
Joined
·
965 Posts
I don't think someone has to be delusional about their intelligence and knowledge to be arrogant, someone who's arrogant can indeed be the smartest most knowledgeable person in the room.. i don't think it has to do w/ how intelligent or knowledgable someone is, but whether or not they see their intelligence and knowledge as superior to others and act condescendingly towards others. The character House I think is a good example of someone who's arrogant and has the intelligence to go w/ it. I think most people I encounter who are arrogant are very intelligent and knowledgeable, it's not an issue of them not being intelligent, but being close-minded stubborn and a rude asshole to others. .. with that said, I think T thinkers and esp entps can come off as arrogant also because we can be rudely straightforward in sharing stuff, and it's not necessarily that we disrespect other people's opinions (as an arrogant person would) but that we don't see the emotional harm in bluntly sharing an alternative opinion. We might act like a rude asshole not because we'r arrogant, but just because we're a rude asshole :p
Oohh. This is a good point.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
251 Posts
I don't think I'm arrogant, I think I have a firm grasp on my limitations. When I know I'm good at something I know I'm good. When I know I'm bad at something I know I'm bad, though it wont stop me from trying if I'm interested.

But I do act like an arrogant ass. Though it's mostly as a personal joke and to elicit responses from others.
 
1 - 18 of 18 Posts
Top