As always, the evil ENFJ is the only type that is absolutely toxic to my person. However, when I become friends with an ENFJ, it holds for many many years. Perhaps because we learn about each other it is indepth and on a personal level. And for this reason, perhaps when we do have our fights it hurts and badly. In a word, ENFJs give a damn. However, my mechanical interface has trouble registering the flower.
So, how can I better relate to an ENFJ, both men and women (especially women), and how can I better establish and reinforce my friendships? ENFJs are convinced that I do not care, when secretly I do. My ego and arrogance have always gotten in the way of lowering my defences and otherwise trusting this type. I want to, badly. When my defences are finally lowered, I do not know what to do. Please help.
So i'm pretty new here and i cant say i'm an expert, but maybe my experience with estp's can help you out a bit?
I love estps, you guys are super fun, but sometimes i have a hard time understanding you guys! Its been my experience that estps dont take too much personally (at least on the surface i guess). I however, as an enfj (and i dont know whether this applies to all of us), take almost every interaction i have with someone to heart and i search for meaning in everything, even if it wasnt a big deal in the whole scheme of things. My own happiness is very much dependent on others' happiness and i have this overwhelming need to be liked haha its kind of sad.
Opening up and being vulnerable to anyone is hard, but the best thing to do is just be honest. Go big or go home in that respect If you truly do care about something, just share it! I think most enfj's can tell when someone is being genuine and i think your enfj friends will appreciate that more than anything. Contrary to the implications of a "judging"-type, i dont think your friends would "judge" you if you cared about something or opened up about something personal, but would instead try to help or make you feel better in whatever way they could and even if it wasnt something negative, they would still lend a willing ear
I dont know how much that really answered, i could probably answer a more specific question better, but i hope that helped at least a little bit!
my sister is a enfj and im a estp, we dont get along well at all. and i dont think were supposed to lol. maybe our personality types are just not meant to be, too different
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