I'm sorry you've made up your mind about college before even going. While I think everyone should go in the way they best see fit, I do think its mistake to assume that because you had a rough go of things in high school (presumably) that this would continue into higher education. I think if you did just a casual survey of many people who have completed their higher education, at least in America, what you will find more often is quite the opposite. That people who were not especially fond of their high school years came to love their college years because the university environment provided just the very avenues for self-expression and development that are often stifled in high school.I haven't been to college yet, and I don't plan on going. I'm sure it would change me in a negative way. Being left out for another 4 years just like I am in high school would not make me feel any better.
Don't base your expectations of college on what it was like in high school. They're VERY different. I hated high school's guts too, but college was amazing. The people are typically nice, and if you meet a crew you don't like? You will probably never see them again at a big enough school.I haven't been to college yet, and I don't plan on going. I'm sure it would change me in a negative way. Being left out for another 4 years just like I am in high school would not make me feel any better.
Kudos to this. I had doubts about college at one low point, but now, it has been a dream come true! If you look hard enough, you'll find some path or more. ^^I'm sorry you've made up your mind about college before even going. While I think everyone should go in the way they best see fit, I do think its mistake to assume that because you had a rough go of things in high school (presumably) that this would continue into higher education. I think if you did just a casual survey of many people who have completed their higher education, at least in America, what you will find more often is quite the opposite. That people who were not especially fond of their high school years came to love their college years because the university environment provided just the very avenues for self-expression and development that are often stifled in high school.
I'm a bit biased because I have spent a lot of time in and around collegiate environments, as both a student and a teacher, and I've personally watched the maturity of students change from their freshmen to senior and then post-graduate years. There are certainly people who attempt to bring the mentality of their high school years into college, but what I've noticed is that doesn't last very long. A university in America at least is a small city with upwards of 30-50,000 people all with different interests. If you've made up your mind that you cannot find a place for you amongst the myriad of different opportunities presented then that is not an environmental failure (in other words, its not the university's fault) its a failure of perspective.
Being able to afford it is one thing (and even then you'd be surprised how much some schools can help you out -- the Ivy's routinely meet up to 100% of student needs without having to take out a bunch of loans). But simply assuming that you're going to be miserable, left out, or carry over whatever issues you have now is a big mistake. I would argue having been around a while now that most college students these days have the opposite problem, with the economy and job market being what they are; they get into college and don't want to leave.
Very interesting! The manipulation seems mean, but it is SO true (I feel, for INFJs). I have definitely done this before.Eh, I'm not a huge fan of breaking things down into the whole Fe, Fi, Fo, Fum stuff mostly because I find that it feels awkward to read it aloud or write about it when describing how you behave.
(Rambling because I'm hyper from green tea)
In general though, my experience with University was similar to my transformation from awkward creeper to Prince Charming in the romance department. The chances are, at some point of your life (probably right now), you think you're awkward, shy, have little to offer, and the worst thing you could do is say or do something stupid to only highlight all this even further. Most people will try to avoid this at all costs and simply remain quiet, whereas anxiety works different for others in that they'll "blah blah blah."
Now, I hope this is 1+1 to most of you, but the truth is that a strong majority of people think they are awkward, dorky, O-K in the looks depart, they have things about themselves they are hiding from you (from skin blemishes -> personality traits -> hobbies, etc) and when it all comes down to it, they become so self absorbed with things they don't like about themselves that it's really difficult for you to actually stand out in any meaningful way and for them to think "wow, that person has problems." In fact, it's -really- easy to do the opposite -- come across as confident, "smart," leader, and so fourth.
So for the guys out there that think the girl they're interested in is some total bombshell and out of their league, a complete "10" by their scale. Realistically, she thinks she's like a 6-7, her feet & nose are too big, and her hair looks gross today. You swoop in and focus on her, comfort her in any way, and pull her away from those self-defeating thoughts and all of a sudden you seem like a stud that's self assured.
Spin this around a bit and it's the same idea in a classroom full of strangers. You may think this is a serious setting, lots of money going into this, they all look prepared, no one really says anything or answers the professors questions (therefore no one is wrong), but at the end of the day this may as well be a room full of worker ants -- complete drones. I went from the shy stiff guy in the room, to the guy with my legs up on the table steering the class discussion in a way that made it more interesting for everyone. Deep down, I'm still the shy awkward dork I mentioned earlier, but it's important to know how to recognize opportunities and how to take advantage it.
Finally though, University is fairly easy, especially if you're pursuing an arts degree. Most of these tests/term papers aren't meant to test your knowledge, but rather to basically jerk off the professor and make them think they did a great job teaching you. If you find the wave length they're on, their general personality, you always slant your work towards that to make the grade. I've gone the rebellious route, "maybe this will make them 2nd guess themselves," but honestly it's like trying to convince a religious person that God doesn't exist -- you just don't do it.
All I learned in University was how there are numerous systems in place in the world and how you can manipulate them.
I feel that too: no longer having to please people that have known me forever, for I am in a wholeeee new environment.I have never been good with defining the cognitive functions. I can tell you this much though: College certainly changed me.
I may still be the shy, socially awkward, timid, spazzy, weird, ME that I've always been... but I'm okay with that now.
If I have something that I really need to say, forget you, I'm saying it. If the awkward silence in the room starts bothering me, I will pop off with one of the longest strings of random trivia you've ever heard. People will either start talking, or they'll laugh. Yes, I'm aware that I speak at a whisper, always have, but that whisper has some rather important things to say sometimes. I like order, if you get me off my chosen path I will panic. You know what I'll do after that? Laugh at how stupid I was being.
I'm also no longer afraid to show people just how weird I am. If I decide to bring Lefse and jam with me for lunch, you can continue wondering what the heck I'm eating. I will wear my Final Fantasy jewelry. I will do my traditional "happy dance" if one of my friends announces something awesome. I really just don't care anymore. I went from wanting to fit in and being excluded for it, to being me and being complimented on my uniqueness.
The absolute most important way college has changed me, is that I stopped thinking I had to please everybody. Helping people and being a slave are two completely different things. I will not be taken advantage of any more.
In essence, college has turned me into an A hole!