[laurenrae08]

Sometimes he has F characteristics but sometimes he has T characteristics. What's a good distinction?

 

[Tuttle]

You need to find out if he uses extraverted feeling (definition here) more or extraverted thinking (definition here) more. ESTJ's dominant function is extraverted thinking where as ESFJ's dominant function is extraverted feeling.

 

[laurenrae08]

You need to find out if he uses extraverted feeling (definition here) more or extraverted thinking (definition here) more. ESTJ's dominant function is extraverted thinking where as ESFJ's dominant function is extraverted feeling.

See, I can see him fitting into either of those definitions. He's responsible, hard working, punctual, loyal but also has many friends who are girls, is often the "shoulder to cry on", family-oriented, pays close attention to my needs, and details in general (he remembers the exact outfit I wore on our first date and exact wording of things I've said a year ago). He values relationships and makes a point to keep in touch with old friends, and he has a lot of friends. He is going to school to be a personal trainer because he loves to help people, but he likes to be in charge and is very practical.

 

[TreeBob]

See, I can see him fitting into either of those definitions. He's responsible, hard working, punctual, loyal but also has many friends who are girls, is often the "shoulder to cry on", family-oriented, pays close attention to my needs, and details in general (he remembers the exact outfit I wore on our first date and exact wording of things I've said a year ago). He values relationships and makes a point to keep in touch with old friends, and he has a lot of friends. He is going to school to be a personal trainer because he loves to help people, but he likes to be in charge and is very practical.

None of those qualities have anything to do with feeling or thinking. One simple way is when you get in fights or have discussions does he logically break down the argument or does he get emotional? simplistic but with most thinkers it is easy to tell.

 

[laurenrae08]

None of those qualities have anything to do with feeling or thinking. One simple way is when you get in fights or have discussions does he logically break down the argument or does he get emotional? simplistic but with most thinkers it is easy to tell.

You're right. He does both! He breaks arguments down and discusses my mannerisms, actions, etc rather than my thoughts/emotions but he's gotten emotional and cried on several occasions (and hates it). Sometimes I think he might be a Feeler hiding behind a thinker so he doesn't come off as a "sensitive guy".

 

[laurenrae08]

Oh and he is creative and artsy. Not much of a math person, nor an english person either. He almost majored in art, was in musicals/plays in high school, draws (really well), etc.

 

[Staryu]

Oh and he is creative and artsy. Not much of a math person, nor an english person either. He almost majored in art, was in musicals/plays in high school, draws (really well), etc.

ESTJ. what you're mentioning sounds pretty Fi.

 

[TreeBob]

You're right. He does both! He breaks arguments down and discusses my mannerisms, actions, etc rather than my thoughts/emotions but he's gotten emotional and cried on several occasions (and hates it). Sometimes I think he might be a Feeler hiding behind a thinker so he doesn't come off as a "sensitive guy".

Yeah I would say thinker then. I cry now and then as well. We have feelings too you know!