I am curious how others break-up and how many tries before it sticks. My friend broke up 24 times with her then boyfriend before they finally broke up, and then a year later got married in Vegas :crazy:.
I have only even been broken up with once (as I only have one ex lol) and he did it over the phone...it went kind of like this:
Me: Oh hey, what's up? Him: nothin, what are you doing tonight? Me: going to a party Him: cool...hey, uhh, we need to talk Me: ok, about what? Him: I don't think we should be together anymore Me: umm...alight...why? Him: I know it's cliche, but it really is me, not you; I just really need to get my life together [while I find this understandable seeing as how he just got out of prison, I doubt that if he had thought I was perfect he would still have broken up with me] Me: *laugh* ok...so whats the real reason? Him: No, really, that is the real reason! Me: Uhh...ok...bye then Him: bye
no hard feelings but I never spoke to him again...though I did go out and party that night and had a pretty good time :laughing:
I dislike confrontation, so I tend to do the fade out if it's not a serious or hasn't been a lengthy relationship. I know it makes me an asshole, but oh well. If it's been longer term or serious, I just utter the dreaded 'we need to talk' and state my reasons and try to not get into all the emotions breaking up brings. If I'm at that point, I've already decided and it's over....very little would make me change my mind.
I haven't done the breaking up many times, usually I end up dragging my feet and causing the other person to break up with me once they realize my heart isn't in it anymore. Broke up with my first girlfriend over text because I was angry with her and basically wouldn't wait to do it IRL. She thought that was pretty lame funnily enough... The only other one was because we were really awkward and it had only been a couple of days so I managed to break it off before it started to feel too hard to do it.
Basically I'm a break-up coward... :mellow: I can feel it's not going to work out and kinda shut-down but not do anything about it for ages
I am usually very quiet, and serious and calculated. I will only ever do it in person, any different and it is showing deep disrespect for the other. I don't drag it out, and try to leave the wound as clean as possible.
I break up once. If it doesn't work out that one time, I have my doubts about the other person's commitment to the relatiohship. I deserve better. If I break up with them, it's probably for a good reason, and if I go back, my subconcious will sabatoge the entire relationship. It's really stressful when that happens. I go on autopilot and things just happen...
The girl I dumped, I did it over the phone. I was so ashamed. I still am a little. It was a situation where she liked me, but I wasn't really that into her and in trying to be nice I just made it all about a million times worse. Sometimes you should just break someone's heart early instead of shattering it later. :sad:
When I got dumped it was pretty pathetic. I was in a relationship that I knew had rotted beyond all hope, but I still couldn't get myself to abandon it. Actually, I only ended up getting dumped that night because I was pushing her when she was being really distant. And I stayed in her room that night. She said she didn't want me to leave. I guess she was worried about me, but in hindsight. this was a huge fucking mistake. Yeah I know it seems obvious that I should've gotten out of there immediately, but I guess I was still trying to convince myself at the time that we were still in love and that it was all gonna pass. Oh and I cried. Ok, so it wasn't pretty pathetic. It was extremely pathetic.
Romantic me can be a clingy douchebag. Makes me wonder why I desire a relationship so much.
I have broken up in person and over the phone because he lived in another city. I never regretted the decision because I thought long and hard weighing everything before I broke up. Let's face it, we have all loved and lost but it's better to have loved then not. :happy:
Breaking up with someone in any other way than in person is just BS.
Never been dumped, but dumped a few guys... Let me tell you, it's not a nice feeling. Especially having in mind that they were my good friends and I really cared about them; it was just that the spark was gone and I don't like lying to people. I shut off emotions when breaking up and just say things clearly, while making sure I don't hurt the person too much. I make it clear that I've made up my mind and that I want to be friends, but it's up to them to decide. And... I try not to be a bitch. The reactions are more interesting, though.
First one got drunk, called me asking why I hated him, tried to get back together with me, and later moved away (not because of me though). He's one of my best friends now (it wasn't a serious relationship at all, 2 months or so). <3 The second said okay and went about his way (I'm pretty sure he was an ISTx...). And the last one (xNFP, I think, we were very much alike) was... well, honestly heartbroken, but handled it with dignity.
Gah, I feel horrible just remembering. >.> I hate hurting people, it's a huge no-no of mine, but sometimes I've just had it and I need to look after myself, which results in bad things for other people that happen to care..
Currently dating a very sensitive ISFJ and if we ever break up, I have no idea what's going to happen... I just know it's going to get pretty ugly.