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Discussion Starter #1
Like when it gets so hard that you just can't help but blurt out anything and everything. It's a serious issue i have. My mind gets blank when i get angry so I can't think of any positive qualities of people. My whole body gets numb and the blood boils up. I don't know but something happens to my mouth which urges me to speak the things which i regret afterwards. And only after throwing out the anger, i feel relieved and after sometime i regret. Because everytime i try to be good, i lose due to my aggressiveness. And reason i get angry can be anything. Whether it's family or any one else. How do i have a contol on this?

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I used to have a best friend many years ago with anger issues, and whenever she is mad at me she would start taking out her anger onto me, and start emotionally abusing me, and her anger issues is what ultimately ended our friendship, as I don't put up with abusive behaviors from people. I think I've given her plenty of chances too,
I've forgiven her abusive behaviors for at least 10 times until I couldn't take it anymore and decide to cut her out from my life forever. This is such a tough decision for me to make at that time, given that she is my best friend and is supposedly the closest person to me in my life, but I have to place my mental health first.
So this is generally what happens when a person is unable to control their anger, they ended up losing the people who are important to them, as nobody is willing to tolerate their abusive behaviors. Just sharing this over here as I hope that this would be able to help motivate you to control your anger.

Imo the way to control your anger is to avoid being around the person you're mad at until you've calmed down and able to think rationally around them again. Once you feel like you've calmed down and you're no longer mad at them anymore, then you can start interacting with them again. This is to prevent yourself from saying any rash words to them.
Remember, people will forget what you did and said, but they will always remember how you made them feel.
 

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I found vocalizing my frustration early on helps.
If these are beginning to frustrate me, I express that in some manner. Sometimes I have actual words to say, other times all I can let out are some long loud grunts.

It also helps to have someone to talk to. I’ll usually explain what happened then ultimately proceed to make light of it all. I’ll make jokes.

If it gets worse, I often play angry music and start an argument with myself as I stomp around my home blindly. Other times I just bite the bullet use marijuana, it always changes my mood.
 

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All I can think of is leaving the room when you feel an anger attack coming on. Or telling yourself "Don't go there." I've done this with other kinds of thoughts.

As an INTP, I'm often not aware of how I feel--until I've been pushed to the limit and find myself reacting. (In my case it usually means running away.) But maybe in that split second we can choose a different reaction.

Good luck!
 

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Discussion Starter #5
Remember, people will forget what you did and said, but they will always remember how you made them feel.
I actually found it useful. It will help me control my anger. Thank you very much :)

all I can let out are some long loud grunts.

If it gets worse, I often play angry music and start an argument with myself as I stomp around my home blindly.
If i do it, I'll probably get a slap from mum:/ Anyway, thank you so much for sharing this. If i ever get a chance, I'll surely try this.




All I can think of is leaving the room when you feel an anger attack coming on. Or telling yourself "Don't go there." I've done this with other kinds of thoughts.
That's something i advise everyone else but forget to do it myself. Because it's very hard to not reply to comments of my siblings and simply walk away. They get on my nerves. Thank you very much friend :)



Canis Lupas /##/
 
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