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Discussion Starter #1
So if you have a friend that is upsetting you, how do you handle them? In the past I've tried to get my point of view across to them and it never works. They just believe whatever they want to about me or my actions. I tell myself that the next time i see them i will either make sure to get my point across (because they kept interrupting the first time or refused to understand it) or ignore them. What i end up doing is a different story. I end up acting nice to them like they never called me all those names. Then i stress about it because i still want to get my feelings out. I hope I'm not the only one :laughing:
In situations where a friend has wronged, you what do you do?
 

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I 'rank' them lower on my friends list. However, I will try a couple of times to get my point across, resorting to ignoring what they said previously, if need be, and just 'present' what I want to say. It's hard, but if successful, and confirmed/acknowledged, they may retain their rank, or even climb up.
 

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It's awful- I know- but I build my feelings up and then get mad after trying so many times to get something across to them. They never take me seriously. :/
A sternly-worded text normally gets them to understand, though, beacause I think in their minds, it goes, "he actually means it because this is so solemnly worded and forceful, and he took time to write all that out. I guess I made an oopsy."
 

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I'm struggling with this question...I've had this tab open for a while now :laughing:

I'm usually honest in the things I say, which might be one reason I don't quite compute. My friends (used quite loosely) know when I get irritated. If I have a point to get across, I will get it across. (Well, I suspect that some of my friends back out because they don't want to debate with me anymore...) These are people I don't generally see as sensitive, though. I can come across as inconsiderate sometimes, but with people that are genuinely sensitive, I know how to restrain myself.

I have one extremely sensitive friend, who also happens to be my closest friend. She rarely upsets me, though, and if she does, it's indirect. With her, I'll usually recede somewhat to think about how to best handle the situation. We share a mutual understanding, so when I do discuss it with her, we resolve it easily.
 

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I have had this kind of thing happen in my friendships. What I do is acknowledge that there is a problem- an elephant in the room, an unspoken tension- that I must express. If they care enough about you they should hear you out. Be mature, display what they did that rubbed you the wrong way and how it made you feel or made you think. Letting her know that you are trying to fix things not end the friendship is key- word what you have to say in a caring manner.

Now, from personal experience, I have shut out people like this especially if they bring me down with their negativity. At the very least leave me be, I love the sound you make when you STFU haha. I would save shutting them mostly for self preservation- if my existence seems more miserable with a certain person in it then make believe they do not exist.
 

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Discussion Starter #7
I have had this kind of thing happen in my friendships. What I do is acknowledge that there is a problem- an elephant in the room, an unspoken tension- that I must express. If they care enough about you they should hear you out. Be mature, display what they did that rubbed you the wrong way and how it made you feel or made you think. Letting her know that you are trying to fix things not end the friendship is key- word what you have to say in a caring manner.
This is exactly how i want to do things, but instead i keep it to myself and bury my feelings, pretending nothing ever happened. And then i hate myself for it. I want to both get along with my friend and get my point across, but any kind of confrontation worries me that she will reject my feelings and start the argument again. It's strange how she's the only friend that i can't argue with. With any one else i can make a compromise, but it feels like she doesn't want that. It feels like she just wants to win no matter the stakes.
 

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It's awful- I know- but I build my feelings up and then get mad after trying so many times to get something across to them. They never take me seriously. :/
A sternly-worded text normally gets them to understand, though, beacause I think in their minds, it goes, "he actually means it because this is so solemnly worded and forceful, and he took time to write all that out. I guess I made an oopsy."
This is true.
 

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That's happened to me before, I've forgiven and acted nice to some people who definitely didn't deserve it. But generally, when I feel like a person hates me or there is tension, I just completely ignore them and pretend they don't exist unless they approach me. Then I try to deal with it the quickest way I can: act like nothing is wrong and nothing ever happened. =_= It sucks. Though I have brought up the misunderstanding later on when the tension has calmed out (the explain my point of view on it and hopefully the person would listen at that point)
 
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