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Since my ISTJ friends adore lists :tongue:
  1. Are birthdays and anniversaries important to you, or somewhat meaningless? why?
  2. Do you like giving gifts? Do you expect people to do for you what you do for them to commemorate the occasion (if you choose to celebrate it)?
  3. Are some holidays more important than others?
  4. Do you get angry if someone you love forgets a birthday/anniversary?

AKA I thought it was March 25 today, so I haven't finished my ISTJ friend's present :cry: I'm going to give it to her tomorrow and she's not mad (I'm sick and she's a wonderful human), but I was just wondering what other ISTJs think
 

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Since my ISTJ friends adore lists :tongue:
  1. Are birthdays and anniversaries important to you, or somewhat meaningless? why?
  2. Do you like giving gifts? Do you expect people to do for you what you do for them to commemorate the occasion (if you choose to celebrate it)?
  3. Are some holidays more important than others?
  4. Do you get angry if someone you love forgets a birthday/anniversary?

AKA I thought it was March 25 today, so I haven't finished my ISTJ friend's present :cry: I'm going to give it to her tomorrow and she's not mad (I'm sick and she's a wonderful human), but I was just wondering what other ISTJs think

  1. Relatively meaningless. I'm often surprised when the first person wishes me a happy birthday because I typically hadn't even realized or thought about the fact that it was my birthday myself. If they're important to me, I'm pretty good at remembering the FACT of the specific date of somebody's birthday... but I'm absolutely terrible at realizing that the date is actually upon us (sounds a bit like your scenario). I guess I don't think about them (the dates, not the people) enough to develop any anticipation.
  2. I like giving thoughtful and meaningful gifts to people I care about. I hate receiving gifts. It's not that I don't appreciate them, but my ISTJ-typical lack of external reaction seems to disappoint the giver, and I don't like doing that to them.
  3. Holidays really have no great intrinsic meaning to me... despite the stereotype I place little value in traditions... EXCEPT for the fact that holiday gatherings often provide an opportunity to get together with people I care about but do not get to see very often.
  4. Well... I already said I'm surprised when they do because I've probably forgotten it, too... so I can't complain too much if they have as well. That said, there are a very few, very close people that I greatly appreciate hearing from on those days... essentially immediate family only. I don't really expect anything at all from anyone else.
 

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  1. Are birthdays and anniversaries important to you, or somewhat meaningless? why?
The older I get, the less meaningful they get. I'm not really sure of the point tbh but I'm happy to go with it really. I think it's habit mostly, but it's comforting to have particular days of acknowledgement once a year. For example, I always make an effort not to work on my birthday (I take annual leave if needed) and do something enjoyable - go somewhere special mostly.

I always remember others' birthdays and like to make them feel special on that day where I can.

  1. Do you like giving gifts? Do you expect people to do for you what you do for them to commemorate the occasion (if you choose to celebrate it)?
I enjoy choosing gifts and giving them to people I most care about. I'm so much of a fan of the secret Santa type gift giving though as the thing I enjoy about gift giving is choosing gifts with care that will mean something special to someone you care about. With the secret Santa type things you end up with someone you barely know and a price cap which is good and bad in that it's difficult to get something meaningful when you hardly know them, and then if the only thing you think is suitable is outside the price range, what do you do then?!

I don't really expect anything from people for occasions. For example, if I was really good friends with someone very outgoing who loved parties, I'd happily organise something like that for them, even if I'd be horrified if they did it in return. I think to an extent it is courteous to return gifts and such like, but I have some absent-minded friends who I would never expect anything like that from because that's just the way they are. So to some extent it depends on the person.

  1. Are some holidays more important than others?
The only holidays which really get any celebration here are Easter and Christmas. And I'd say Easter is pretty much limited to a long weekend and a bit of extra chocolate mostly (unless you are religious, which I'm not really). I find Christmas important in the sense that I've always tried to stick to the 2 weeks with family 'rule' which as always there when I was younger. I like that there are those 2 weeks at the end of the year where you focus on your family and I'm keen to keep with that particular tradition at least.

  1. Do you get angry if someone you love forgets a birthday/anniversary?

AKA I thought it was March 25 today, so I haven't finished my ISTJ friend's present :cry: I'm going to give it to her tomorrow and she's not mad (I'm sick and she's a wonderful human), but I was just wondering what other ISTJs think
Generally not. As above, I think it depends on the person in question. I don't really expect people to remember exact dates for birthdays either, a card a few days late is as welcome as one a few days early - it really is the thought that counts. I certainly wouldn't be angry in the scenario you describe for yourself. In fact the thing that stood out for me was that you said you hadn't finished her present, suggesting you're making something personal and special. I'd definitely wait a couple more days ;)
 

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yeah, what they said :p
1. Are birthdays and anniversaries important to you, or somewhat meaningless? why?
-mostly meaningless. I feel like it's just another day in our lives that more specifically marks the passage of time. Any other day can be "special" in its own way. It's more fun to treat every day like that.

2.Do you like giving gifts? Do you expect people to do for you what you do for them to commemorate the occasion (if you choose to celebrate it)?
-not really. I don't expect people to do anything. Sometimes doing something together or cake is nice. But I like cake anytime...and if you want to give me food, I'm always game. Doesn't have to be special. oranges, peanut butter, whatever.

3. Are some holidays more important than others?
-no. I like Halloween though, but it has to do with seasons more. St. Paddy's day too, because, well, fiddle :)

4. Do you get angry if someone you love forgets a birthday/anniversary?
-no. I used to remember (have marked on a calendar) most people's. not anymore. I guess something happened. I hope nobody gets mad at me for forgetting (!)
 

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I don't care about birthdays/anniversaries. I also don't keep lists. I barely know my immediate family members' birthdays.

I don't like the feeling of being obligated by others to do something that is not that meaningful to me.

Do I like giving gifts? No, not at all.

Would I get angry if someone forgot my birthday? Not at all. That would be hypocritical on my part. I would probably be surprised if they remembered it.
 

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  1. Are birthdays and anniversaries important to you, or somewhat meaningless? why?
Depends on the person. If it's someone close to me, then I'll get them a card and a small/useful gift.



  1. Do you like giving gifts? Do you expect people to do for you what you do for them to commemorate the occasion (if you choose to celebrate it)?
No. No... really, the only thing I expect are those in my inner circle to remember the date and privately wish me a happy birthday.




  1. Are some holidays more important than others?
Not really. Most so-called holidays are nothing more than commercialized shop-fests. Having said that, the two "holidays" that I probably have the most/vested interest in are New Years' (reflect on the past year, devise plans for change), and 4th of July (because well... Summer is good and I like a good cookout on a hot day with close friends).



  1. Do you get angry if someone you love forgets a birthday/anniversary?
To an extent, but only because if I can take the time to write it down (I would forget theirs otherwise), then I believe that they should write it down as well. I don't expect anything except a simple and private acknowledgement.
 

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Since my ISTJ friends adore lists :tongue:
  1. Are birthdays and anniversaries important to you, or somewhat meaningless? why?
  2. Do you like giving gifts? Do you expect people to do for you what you do for them to commemorate the occasion (if you choose to celebrate it)?
  3. Are some holidays more important than others?
  4. Do you get angry if someone you love forgets a birthday/anniversary?

AKA I thought it was March 25 today, so I haven't finished my ISTJ friend's present :cry: I'm going to give it to her tomorrow and she's not mad (I'm sick and she's a wonderful human), but I was just wondering what other ISTJs think
1. I honour them but it's just an obligation. I've been crap with birthdays recently. I used to be able to remember them but I can only remember those I've already memorised years ago.
2. Yeah it's okay. I like giving good gifts though and that can be hard/expensive. I let people do what they want for their birthday and sometimes offer to pay. I probably would expect some of the same courtesy back.
3. Christmas because presents. All other holidays I'm not too fussed over. But hey, bank holidays get me a few days off work here and there. :p
4. This year my boyfriend didn't get me any birthday presents at first and didn't say happy birthday to me in the morning and it was like the Battle of The Somme. Having said that though, this year my "maybe mild to moderate seasonal affective disorder" was definitely on the moderate side. As in not affecting work but affecting everything else. Eh... I don't know how I'd be about it if I was born in the summer.
 

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Since my ISTJ friends adore lists :tongue:
  1. Are birthdays and anniversaries important to you, or somewhat meaningless? why?
  2. Do you like giving gifts? Do you expect people to do for you what you do for them to commemorate the occasion (if you choose to celebrate it)?
  3. Are some holidays more important than others?
  4. Do you get angry if someone you love forgets a birthday/anniversary?

AKA I thought it was March 25 today, so I haven't finished my ISTJ friend's present :cry: I'm going to give it to her tomorrow and she's not mad (I'm sick and she's a wonderful human), but I was just wondering what other ISTJs think
1. Not too important. Unless you are a special person to me of course.
2. Gifts have to be perfect, otherwise I just hate them. I don't expect people to do things the way I would want.
3. Holidays aren't too important at all.
4. Never angry, secretly hope they forget.

Now, if something is planned in advance and people cancel/don't show up, that would upset me.
 

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1. Are birthdays and anniversaries important to you, or somewhat meaningless? why?

Birthdays not really. I'm not young, and getting older only excites me because it means I'm still here. I would be disappointed if my husband and kids didn't remember, but I really don't expect anyone else to. I also prefer things to be as low key as possible. For example: don't take me to a restaurant and have them sing happy birthday to me. This would not be well received.

I would be disappointed if my husband didn't remember our anniversary. I don't really care for surprise gifts or anything, but going out to eat at a nice restaurant is always appreciated. It lets me know that he doesn't regret the decision he made 30 years ago.

2. Do you like giving gifts? Do you expect people to do for you what you do for them to commemorate the occasion (if you choose to celebrate it)?

I would much rather give people money so that they can buy something they actually want and can use. I wouldn't say that I like giving gifts, but I am not opposed to it if the occasion calls for it. I don't give gifts with the expectation of receiving one in return. I find that the majority of the gifts people give to me, aren't anything I want or can use. I would rather not receive gifts most of the time, because I often struggle to come up with appropriate responses to the gift giver.

3. Are some holidays more important than others?

No they are not. There are some that I enjoy more than others. I like July 4th because my husband usually gets the entire week off. I like Thanksgiving because I usually get to see family members that I don't often have the opportunity to visit with.

4. Do you get angry if someone you love forgets a birthday/anniversary?

No, I don't get angry about it, but my feelings might be hurt a bit if my husband forgets. Beyond my husband or kids, I don't expect it to be remembered. If someone does, it is just a pleasant surprise.
 

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Since my ISTJ friends adore lists :tongue:
  1. Are birthdays and anniversaries important to you, or somewhat meaningless? why?
  2. Do you like giving gifts? Do you expect people to do for you what you do for them to commemorate the occasion (if you choose to celebrate it)?
  3. Are some holidays more important than others?
  4. Do you get angry if someone you love forgets a birthday/anniversary?
1. I like to celebrate recurrencies, but I don't see much meaning in birthdays. I see them more as an occasion to gather with my family or my friends. It could be because organizing them can be a real pain in the rear.
2. I like giving (and getting) gift when they are made with consideration. I don't disdain a simple but useful gift and I hate to waste money.
3. Not really. I'm not religious and I don't care much about Easter or Christmas. I value summer holidays more because I have the chance to relax and dedicate some time to things I don't have time for during the rest of the year.
4. No. But it should be easier to remember them now. It's probably the only thing we should thank Facebook for. :D
 

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Since my ISTJ friends adore lists :tongue:
They sure are tidy.

Are birthdays and anniversaries important to you, or somewhat meaningless? why?
They're important when the person involved is someone I'm very close to. Otherwise I have a tendency to miss them as often as I catch them.

Do you like giving gifts? Do you expect people to do for you what you do for them to commemorate the occasion (if you choose to celebrate it)?
I love to give gifts to people I'm very close to. It's great to be able to make someone happy by showing you've been paying attention. I like when people reciprocate but I don't assume they will. People don't have to get me things. For the most part, I buy what I want when I want it.

Are some holidays more important than others?
Of course.

Do you get angry if someone you love forgets a birthday/anniversary?
I might be upset if we were very close. But, for example, my mother usually forgets my birthday, and really she and I were the most important people involved in that event, you know? Still, it doesn't bother me. Maybe I'm just used to it, or maybe I respect that her life is very busy and there are much more important things for her to do than remember what day of the year I was born.


AKA I thought it was March 25 today, so I haven't finished my ISTJ friend's present :cry: I'm going to give it to her tomorrow and she's not mad (I'm sick and she's a wonderful human), but I was just wondering what other ISTJs think
I think it's cool that you thought enough to get her one at all. Timing is less important to me than the existence of a gesture in the first place is. I'd be surprised and happy to have someone recognize my birthday even months after the fact.
 

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1) Generally meaningless. Why celebrate? It's not an achievement.

2) Generally Meh. Buy yourself what you want and I'll buy myself what I want.

Thoughtful gifts of a personal nature are the exception.

I hate the socially obligatory gift giving. Really hate it.

3) Holidays without gifts are the best holidays.

4) I would prefer that no one bother with my birthday. I usually don't remember it until someone else brings it up.
 

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