[PollyPocket]

I think @Sily is onto something & I want to add to it too.... Soulmates are like two squirrels floating down the same river in two separate but identical tea cups :tongue:

 

[SenhorFrio]

i have found my soulmate, while we have had diffrent experiences, we relate in so so many ways it's really cool

 

[Sily]

Haha @PollyPocket. :happy: Love that analogy!

 

[Rez]

three kinds of soul mates

soul mate (twin flame)-can be either gender, the pieces feel like they fit perfectly. Everything feels right.More importantly, together you want to improve the state of the world.You may or may not meet your soul mate in this life.

companion soul mate-partners,friends & relatives. It is commonly confused with soul mates that is why most people marry their companion soul mates since it is more common. You feel so great with this person but not all the pieces fit perfectly.

karmic soul mate-Anyone. Someone you have debts to pay to or vice versa.Can be anyone, your partner,family and/or friends.

I recommend the book:

Souls united written"by Ann Merivale

It will wake up your feelings

This song explains it in a fun way

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L2xNoJUtEFI&feature=player_embedded

 

[keelinyeah]

I see the process of love as a matter of putting pieces into place. I'll only have one soulmate, but that doesn't mean that there won't be people in my life who I got along with well, and love. But to me, a soul mate is someone who truly understands me, enjoys the same things as I do, and can make up for my weaknesses with their strengths, essentially, to help us both be happy. Sadly, I have somewhat high expectations of people, so if I can find someone that I'm not repulsed by after realizing they're not "special", it'll be a sign. I think the reason I look for a perfect person is because I see this person as being a life-long thing, my soulmate.

 

[Disfigurine]

I really struggle with that term, honestly.

I believe in multiple soulmates of different types.

A cat can be a soulmate, a sister, a friend, an enemy, a stranger on the street.

It doesn't have to be romantic, it can be extremely platonic in nature.

I have met a few of different degrees. It doesn't always mean a good thing. Sigh.

It's a connection, an affinity, an understanding, or sometimes just a very long history (yes, I believe in past lives, sue me.)


As far as romance goes, I don't know what I believe. The one? Love at first sight? Eh.
I know I've found someone I connect with on many levels, and it is special and significant. That is all that matters to me

 

[Aelthwyn]

True Love, Love at First Sight, Soul Mates, Kindred Spirits .....I believe in all of this, but perhaps not in the stereotypical way.

First of all, most of my friendships have been love at first sight. I saw someone, I knew I would be great friends with them, we met, and instantly hit it off and felt a sense of kin-ship. Of course I have also become good friends with people more gradually over time. But I can say that with those instant friends it wasn't infatuation which just happened to prove true, we really did understand and love eachother from the start. Thus, if it works with friendships it must work with romance too, because a romantic partner is really just a more special friend - in my oppinion.

I think there are many people who -if only they had the chance to meet under the right circumstances- could be great life partners for an individual. It's up to you to choose one of them. It's the relationship you form, it's getting to know them and share things together that makes someone 'the only one' for you.

And that's where I think a lot of people make a mistake. Say they pick someone. But then they also meet someone else who could potentially be a great partner for them and they become confused, questioning if the one they picked really was 'the one'. What makes someone 'The One' is your choice to commit to eachother. They're not the only one who could be for you, but they are the only one you choose.

As for knowing soulmates it's always been very intuitive for me. I just know. I suppose it's really a million little things adding up together, but often it is so instantaneous that all the getitng to know you happens after being certain that I will love this person. I just sense a good feeling from them, I sense that we fit together. This intuition has always proved true.

With my husband I did get to know him more gradually though, although it was probably less than half a year before we knew we were right for eachother. It was through talking and talking about all kinds of things together that we came to this conclusion - since we lived in different states at the time we met. When we first met in person it was instant comfort and bliss hehe. And it has remained that way for several years now

I suppose this may not be terribly helpfull to answer the question if you are wondering who your soulmate is.

 

[Cobalt Blue]

I'm more interested at the vote results so far - how we define and see what "soulmate" is. Our subconscious expectation?

 

[eterea]

My soulmate and I found each other. I'd never known or comprehended the level of emotional connection (and physical) that I could have with a partner until now . . . I truly believe he is my soulmate and never much subscribed to the whole "soulmate theory" before.

 

[wisdom]

I don't think there must be lust between soulmates, but there must be romantic feelings. To me, soulmates have some innate connection, predisposition to care, greatly enjoy spending time together, and crave to understand each very well. It can require occasional work, to help each other grow and thrive and to get along with each other as well as possible. I think some people are fixated on a "soulmate" in an immature way, as in getting unconditional love and acceptance that wasn't felt from a parent and that truly can't be provided by anyone.

 

[Lemur Leaf]

Whenever I see threads like these, I immediately run to @faeriegal713's response (even though she started the thread in this case) because I know I'm probably going to agree with just about every word. And then, I oddly find myself surprised, because not only does she express what I'm thinking, but she expresses what I'm not thinking but completely should be thinking. Or she gracefully says something that I've been thinking about so abstractly that it would be impossible for me to type.

I find it nice that there are people out there who have similar outlooks to me. And I also find it refreshing to read some of the outlooks which aren't much like mine, because I love the utter variety that finds itself being expressed in topics like these.

In any case, I'm not going to add much more to this thread. I have my own beliefs. Most of what I believe has been expressed already. So I think I'm just going to carry on lurking.

 

[faeriegal713]

Oh wow, I had almost forgotten about this thread, but it's great to see so many people's responses! It's been a few months since I put up my own definition of "soulmate" and now I even have an idea of what to look for. A few weeks ago I had been pondering this and sort of got hit over the side of the head by a new-ish revelation.

You see, in most relationships each person has their own role, one tends to be the one who's life and person is used to ground the other. I imagined this in some sort of great cosmic sun type thing - a binary star system let's say. One star tends to have a much smaller orbit and only spins on its own axis while the other spins around it. The one that is stable is the grounding and receiving star/person, and the one who orbits the other is the giving person, the one who has changed their life and made the other the focus of their existence. That is a normal relationship - one person gives most of the time and the other receives, and it works for a while, but usually someone will get bored/upset/tired/etc.

How I imagine a relationship with a Soulmate, our One and Only, is that both people manage this nearly unimaginable balance between being simultaneously stable and grounding for the other person while at the same time focusing on the other person. Essentially managing to maintain a stable point in space while still orbiting about another star. It's not even like they're focusing on a space between them or orbiting about something between them. No, the focus is on the other and they are orbiting about the other and being still all at once. I'm not even sure how in the world it's possible, but I suppose when I know how to answer that, then I will know that I have met my Soulmate. roud:

 

[Lemur Leaf]

How I imagine a relationship with a Soulmate, our One and Only, is that both people manage this nearly unimaginable balance between being simultaneously stable and grounding for the other person while at the same time focusing on the other person. Essentially managing to maintain a stable point in space while still orbiting about another star. It's not even like they're focusing on a space between them or orbiting about something between them. No, the focus is on the other and they are orbiting about the other and being still all at once. I'm not even sure how in the world it's possible, but I suppose when I know how to answer that, then I will know that I have met my Soulmate. roud:

And you do it, yet again.

What you described sounds a lot like a Lorenz attractor (even though the implications of a Lorenz attractor are quite different from the meaning behind your message).

But I see it in much of a very similar way. I think it goes beyond simple orbit, it transcends into a dimension where it is not contradictory to say they orbit one another, but mere truth. Where there is no dissonance about it, just a complete sense of consonance. It is, just as it is.

 

[faeriegal713]

And you do it, yet again.

What you described sounds a lot like a Lorenz attractor (even though the implications of a Lorenz attractor are quite different from the meaning behind your message).

But I see it in much of a very similar way. I think it goes beyond simple orbit, it transcends into a dimension where it is not contradictory to say they orbit one another, but mere truth. Where there is no dissonance about it, just a complete sense of consonance. It is, just as it is.

:blushed: *curtsies* happy to be of service in the translation of thoughts to words... now just to find out how to translate feelings to words! :wink:

Actually, I think the image that sparked the entire thought-project was a representation of a Lorenz orbit (not that I was aware of that before my quick google search) so it's quite awesome that was what your mind jumped to. I think the comparison works at several levels as well since what would otherwise be chaos to any and everyone else who experienced what those two individuals experience with each each, but to them, there is harmony and a rhythm behind the madness. And a bit of madness there must be in order to step in time with another through this world where nothing else seems to be able find that same rhyme or reason.

Just thinking/writing about this has greatly increased my desire to experience this first hand.

 

[Lemur Leaf]

:blushed: *curtsies* happy to be of service in the translation of thoughts to words... now just to find out how to translate feelings to words! :wink:

Actually, I think the image that sparked the entire thought-project was a representation of a Lorenz orbit (not that I was aware of that before my quick google search) so it's quite awesome that was what your mind jumped to. I think the comparison works at several levels as well since what would otherwise be chaos to any and everyone else who experienced what those two individuals experience with each each, but to them, there is harmony and a rhythm behind the madness. And a bit of madness there must be in order to step in time with another through this world where nothing else seems to be able find that same rhyme or reason.

Just thinking/writing about this has greatly increased my desire to experience this first hand.

Ah, well, anyone who curtsies must surely have a penchant for great understanding. I'm glad I could also allow you to put a name to the picture that gave you such an interesting perception.

Actually, you may be right. I didn't consider that, but the fact that it represents Chaos Theory could be used as a great analogy for finding meaning in the chaos of it all and how, from a distant perspective (ie, not currently being with your Soulmate) it looks/sounds chaotic, but when given a closer look (ie, finally finding that person and experiencing it firsthand) it appears as a beautiful, almost magnetic, and perfectly understandable on almost every level.

And what you said about harmony and rhyme also resonates entirely with me. It's like two irregular drumbeats, constantly walking around. And amongst everyone else, it sounds like a dissonant mess. But find that other, perfect, irregular drumbeat, and it makes the most beautiful of music.

And thinking/writing about it has given me a wealth of interest regarding it all as well. As you already believe, and so do I, one day, we will experience it firsthand. And we'll probably be pleasantly surprised by how much more it actually finds itself revealing.

 

[Listener]

I like to believe that I have and will find a soulmate. I think most of the time I do believe that I will find someone that could be such a person. But in my bad depressions, I'm not so optimistic.

 

[faeriegal713]

I like to believe that I have and will find a soulmate. I think most of the time I do believe that I will find someone that could be such a person. But in my bad depressions, I'm not so optimistic.

I haven't always been optimistic about it either. Actually, I would say that I was a staunch believer in the idea that everyone else could maybe find their soulmate and be happy, but it would never happen to me. I wasn't special enough, nor was there reason enough for me to think that I ought to deserve any special treatment. (Which in hindsight was really contradictory since I thought everyone else could find a soulmate, but I couldn't so I was the one receiving that special treatment...) So I settled and made stupid choices and pretty much wasted five years that I could have spent searching for my soulmate on someone who did not deserve my time or love or commitment.

I was so ready to just say "fuck it all" and never get involved with anyone again.

But... people here sort of changed my mind, reminded me of what it was that I used to believe in and why and that maybe love, real love, is worth any trouble, any heart ache or heart break, and that we won't know until we give ourselves permission to feel it all. It hurts like hell to have your heart broken. This I know from first hand experience. But... it's still worth it. And that's not even the love of my soulmate! I cannot imagine how absolutely mind-blowing amazing that sort of love has got to be.

So... I guess what I'm trying to say is that even when everything you know and think says give up, please don't. Your soulmate is out there, wandering the world, but missing you at their side and thus missing something so very important. The love you'll share will overshadow the pain and depression you've felt and you'll realize that you may even fully appreciate that love because you've experienced so much of the others.

I have to believe that it will happen for you, because it has to be possible for everyone who is willing to try to find their soulmate. Else what would be the point of some people being happy and others not being given that same opportunity? So... I have to believe.

 

[Paul C Burr]

Soul Playmates

Hi, I was writing my own blog about soul mates today and came across your blog. Thank you for your words about two categories of soul mates - bang on the nail, for me!

/|\

Paul C Burr

 

[Sonne]

I don't know how you would know them until you meet them. And even then, you could mistake something else for it. A soulmate for me, is a single person, not many. Having multiple soulmates contradicts the concept of what it means to be a soulmate. You can have a very special connection with any number of people, but I'm not sure if that means we're soulmates. I always think a soulmate is someone you don't have to work hard to be with. You can be who you are with them, without effort or force. You don't have to be in love with them but you want to be around them. You trust them. You may even have the feeling of being one person. I'm not sure you predetermine whether someone is a soulmate. You may not realize it until after or later that someone was a soulmate. So, I don't think you will always know.

 

[milti]

In my mind, a soulmate = a life partner. Other people that I click with I would prefer to call "kindred spirits", like Anne did in the novel "Anne of Green Gables" (her character is an INFP as well). Someone whom I am happy to be around, who "gets" me, understands my idiosyncracies, with whom I can just be myself, no questions asked, that's what I would want from a soulmate. Also, additionally, being happy in the knowledge that that person was meant for me, and that somewhere in the world there is someone who is my other half.

My boyfriend (an INFP) and I had this discussion on soulmates as well. It pains me that he thinks of them as many people who will enrich his life. To me, he is the one and only. But to him, I'm just one among the many people he will hope to find eventually. As such, he has not made any lasting commitment to me. This makes me sad, as I know (for now anyway) that there's no one else I'd rather call a soulmate than him.

Something @faeriegal713 said above struck a chord in me: In a relationship there's usually one person that anchors the other, but with soulmates, you're both each other's anchor (to paraphrase). That's right on the nose. That's what I think a soulmate/my special someone will be to me. (He already is, he doesn't see it yet though).