Personality Cafe banner

1 - 5 of 5 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
49 Posts
Discussion Starter #1
IN America, in English there is only one word for love. Love. In other languages there are several terms for love, especially greek where there are five different words for love, and I think Latin too.
There is Agape, Eros, Storge, Philia, etc...
I put love in two categories. Eros...a desire to be loved and Agape...a desire to give love.
I am more Agape, but deffinately have Eros too. Philia is a balance.
I put Lust into a completely different category and is not love at all. It is something else. Selfish.
What ways do you love, how do you love and which love do you think is perfect love?
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,199 Posts
I'm going to copy and paste something I wrote on love a while back that I posted on my facebook (with some current edits). Apologies of its length, but if you actually do read it I would like critique or comments. :proud:

There isn't any one way to describe love, and I don't think you can really categorize it. You can only describe the many facets of it, and each person's experience is so much different, that each person develops their own philosophy.
----
Love isn't necessarily sacrifice. Love, is in all essence, sharing. In love you share pains, joys, experiences...you share your entire life with someone (in an idealistic light). Because love isn't a one-way street; the road has to be shared with two people. But sharing your love with someone should not be an obligation...it's a desire to share your life with someone, to, in a sense, have them be a part of you. Consider an example: is sharing your life with a therapist if you have problems love? No, because it is fueled by the desire to fix your problems. However, one has to be careful to distinguish a desire to be loved with actual love. People who spill their guts to every next person are more concerned with the desire to be loved rather than the actual {action} of love. It's like how people say, that sometimes people are more concerned with the idea of love than actually loving.

What about love for another, that isn't returned in the way you expected? That is, you love someone that doesn't love you back. Is that still love? Well, yes. The first glance says, "this love is one-way," and you might assume that here I'm being contradicting because I said that love is two-way. If you assume I'm being contradicting, think again: would this love be one-way? Or are your expectations much too high? You could love someone, be deeply attached, and they do not return it the way you would expect them to. You can accept that they might not "love you back," but you know that this pains you because there is a want for that to be reciprocated. Do you know that they do not love you back? Perhaps they do - just not that much, or as much as you'd want them to subconsciously.

Overall, I think there are three certain connections which distinguishes a consummated love, or the closest thing we can come to it.

Intellectual: Intellectual connection is a love of another person's mind. It can be easily characterized by stimulating conversation. Basically, you like how this person thinks. It's what first connects you to a person. You are not connected by physical attraction first to another person (and if you are, prepare yourself for the most superficial relationship in the world), but the way they think.

Emotional: This is usually the "next step," and you will see emotional connection when both parties express their genuine side. Now some people are just outwardly genuine - you could say, "what you see is what you get," but I actually think that is untrue (in the context I am taking this in). That's because while people are "themselves" either privately or outwardly, you don't experience the capacity of their true genuine side. Their emotions are outwardly expressed in an honest fashion - there is no intent of (malicious) manipulation - but with the other person taken into account. No matter who you are and how honest you may think you appear to the outer world, everyone has a side to them that only a select few get to see. And THAT is where the true emotional connection comes about - genuine emotional expression. It's seeing the "hidden side" of a person that connects them - a statement, saying, "hey, I don't let many people see this side of me, but I'm letting you see it. You're special."

Physical: Some might think that physical connection is really only applicable to romantic love. I disagree. I think that physical connection just plays a smaller role in kinds of love that isn't romantic. It's what separates romantic love from other kinds of love, really. That's what makes consummated love (that is - a love that contains, healthily, all three connections) so intense and different from a love like one you have with a best friend. When you are in a consummated love, you are in love with not only the mind and heart of a person, but also the figure God gave him or her: the entirety of their being.

Don't confuse that with lust. Lust is a sin: you crave the body and being of a person with subliminal, illicit desires. What I am talking about, on the other hand, is a good craving of another person's body or being, which can be hard to distinguish. How do we say it is good? The easiest way I can say that you can distinguish whether it is a good craving is to see if there's any actual illicit desires that lie underneath. "Why do I crave this person's body and being?" It is hard to say whether or not that craving is pure. The truth is, only people themselves can distinguish if it is good; it's just a gut sense that someone just knows that craving is pure. Of course, a person's objectivity can be easily clouded.

In friendship-love, physical connection is held to slightly less stringent expectation than romantic love. In friendship love, it's simply accepting your friend for who (s)he is, accepting that the other person is flawed in their own ways. In romantic love, it's accepting the other person for the flaws and loving them for it.
-----
So how do I love? I believe my love is manifested through my weak function: extroverted sensing. I share my body with another person. There isn't any way I could adequately describe my love in words; I show my love and you must feel it, you must just simply know I love you without any words being said.

I can't sum up my love into words...it's not something you could delineate so easily.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
10,350 Posts
I'm going to copy and paste something I wrote on love a while back that I posted on my facebook (with some current edits). Apologies of its length, but if you actually do read it I would like critique or comments. :proud:
Wow, that was so incredibly insightful! :eek: I agree with everything you said, and I can usually pick flaws in just about anything.

I can't add anything to that - that's exactly how I feel about love!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
17,819 Posts
I'm going to copy and paste something I wrote on love a while back that I posted on my facebook (with some current edits). Apologies of its length, but if you actually do read it I would like critique or comments. :proud:

I can't sum up my love into words...it's not something you could delineate so easily.
I'll be looking forward to you authoring the next big book about love :)

I wouldn't critique that even if I wanted to - it's beautifully written and extremely insightful. I loved it ;)
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
49 Posts
Discussion Starter #5
Thats pretty much what I think, but I have read several books about the different types of love, friendship etc.. that sum it up perfectly, although yours is well done. I could explain it in more depth though. Just dont have the time. :)
 
1 - 5 of 5 Posts
Top