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Discussion Starter #1
My fellow INTJ's:


  • How do you see yourself? What's your self-concept, self realization, or self actualization?
  • How well do you know yourself? What are your strengths, & weaknesses?
  • What are you trying to improve, at the moment?
  • What have you already accomplished?
  • What are your goals &/or dreams?
 

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Discussion Starter #2 (Edited)
How do you see yourself? What's your self-concept, self realization, or self actualization, self-awareness? What are your strengths, & weaknesses?

First the positive, I think that I'm a mature, serious, capable, responsible, well traveled, over-achiever. I know I can accomplish, almost anything, I put my mind to. In that sense, my self-confidence is high, as regards secular, & academic achievements.

However, it wanes when it comes to my own
self-esteem/self-worth, especially in interpersonal relationships. I feel more like a workhorse, that tries not to draw attention, to itself.

Familial relationships, is usually where I'm ministering, to others needs, ahead of my own. The balance is not equalized, so it feels more like a burden to me.

Friendships are more satisfying to me, because they are on equal ground, as far as give, & take. A mutual sharing of ideas, enjoying common interest/activities, & even generosity. Most of the time, these interactions are positive.

Romantic relationships are a bit of a mystery to me. I can't see my own emotional, physical, or sexual attraction, or value, to potential partners, which makes me feel like I'm flying blind. This unsure footing is unnerving, & messy. It's very hard for me to understand, how others can have a constant stream of lovers in their lives, without any seeming difficulty, or reservation. I wonder how intimacy can come so easy for them, but it's like pulling teeth for me. I struggle with letting my guard down, being open to personal attention, & allowing myself to feel vulnerable. I fight that feeling, in every other aspect of my life because it scares me. I like to feel in control, & emotions, make me feel out of control. I don't like them, because they are convoluted, & I don't always comprehend, what I'm feeling, in romantic interactions. Not only that, but I seem to always lean towards limerence, which doesn't seem healthy, productive, or real. It's like I can only see potential SO's, through rose colored glasses, planning an imaginary future, with an ideal, that doesn't exist. I'm not really sure why this aspect of my life is so fanciful. At the rate I'm going, it's never going to become a reality.
:crazy:


How well do you know yourself?
I think I know my mind very well. I am the same person I've always been, from childhood, except that I've gotten older, wiser, & more mature. My thought process is the same, my goals, & my dreams, are consistent.

What are you trying to improve, at the moment?
I'm working on financial freedom, by paying off debt.

What have you already accomplished?
I think I've done a lot so far. I have a stable job. I've gotten to travel around the world. I have a good network of friends.

What are your goals &/or dreams?
I would like to find a better job, hoping to start looking again next spring.
I want to move to another city.
I wish I could be in a healthy romantic relationship, but this is a dream, because I don't have logistical steps towards that plan.
 

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My fellow INTJ's:


  • How do you see yourself? What's your self-concept, self realization, or self actualization?
  • How well do you know yourself? What are your strengths, & weaknesses?
  • What are you trying to improve, at the moment?
  • What have you already accomplished?
  • What are your goals &/or dreams?
I'm an excellent public speaker, teacher/trainer. I love to teach. When I get that "ah ha" moment from someone it is extremely rewarding. I, too, have immense natural confidence. I have never once walked away from a failure during my 19 year career. In fact, I'm usually the guy who figures out and fixes whatever problem has vexed 6 other guys before me.

As strong as I am in my particular areas of expertise, I'm just as quick to let you know where I'm weak, especially if you've come to me for help on something and I know I'm not the right guy to offer that help. If I'm aware of a better resource, I'll point you at that resource. It doesn't bother me to suck at things.

The down side of all of this is that I come across as condescending to some people, and often with people for whom I have a lot of respect. When I inadvertently hurt someone in this way, it's always very hard for me to process. I immediately apologize, and I never try to "explain away" what I did, because I feel like that minimizes people and their feelings. Clearly I hurt you, and so I apologize and I'll try hard not to do that again in the future.

Of course, the simplest way for me to achieve that is to avoid talking to you, or being around you, or working near you ever again and so those situations tend to result in isolation. That's one of the hardest things to deal with - how the very part of my personality most responsible for my success in life becomes the very part of my personality that isolates me from people I like, and who I want to like me back.

In terms of my relationships with my friends - I do tend to be the social glue that holds our group together. I don't feel like this is an undue burden, because I like these people and enjoy spending time with them. If I didn't, I'd cut them out of my life. I have done this with 4 close friends over the years for various reasons. The first guy screwed around on his wife and walked out on his family on his son's 5th birthday (Happy Birthday, son! Daddy doesn't love you anymore!)

The other 3 have been pared away as the rest of us grew up and matured, but these guys never did. I'm too old for stupid games in my personal life. I have zero patience for it, and I've brought new friends into the social circle over time, so ultimately I've replaced old friendships with new ones that better suited where I was in life at the time. Basically, just like no one is the indispensable man at work, there's no friendship that is indispensable, either. Never build a bridge you aren't willing to burn down later - because that's the one they'll use to sneak across in the middle of the night and slit your throat while you're sleeping.

Family - I recently reconnected with my cousins on my mother's side of the family. We're all in similar places in our lives, it turns out, and nearly all of us grew up with screwed up parents. After comparing notes, we're pretty sure there's a high incidence of schizophrenia in the family. Two of my uncles, my mom, and my aunt had serious mental health problems. One aunt and uncle are relatively normal, but the uncle still has serious addiction problems. So, I dealt with family the way I deal with all socially toxic people, which was to completely cut them out of my life. I moved out at 19 and pretty much never looked back.

My relationship with my ESFJ wife is about as difficult as it could possibly be, and I have pretty good relationships with my kids. Like me, they're all really independent and driven, so I don't worry about them.

I know myself extremely well.

I'm constantly working on my social interactions. It's hard, because my natural reactions to people are often the ones that cause the most problems.

I've traveled the world (China twice, Australia twice, Russia, South Africa, Sweden, Italy, Germany several times), but I don't list that among my accomplishments. I did it all for work, so it's not like I was out experiencing a lot of 'culture', though, I've probably experienced more than most. I hit six figures with my income a few years back, and that felt like a huge accomplishment. I bought a house 2 years ago, and that has felt like a major accomplishment. It's just about all I wanted in a home, and I'm still living within my means, so I'm very pleased with my situation, plus we moved back to our home city at the same time and I got to pick up my relationships with my old friends where we all left off. The guys come to my house just about every Friday night for gaming, and I got my 17 year old son involved for the last 4 years. Last year, my two-longest friends both said they consider him a member of the "core group", which is really cool.

I'm working on a culture change within my company. We've seen a lot of leadership changing hands with some retirements at the top. So, there are opportunities to maybe apply some of what I've learned that can really make a positive impact on the organization.
 

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How do you see yourself? What's your self-concept, self realization, or self actualization?
In the most generic terms, I see myself as a complex human being.
Beyond that I am quite happy at where I am right now, in terms of personal development and character.
Not all quirks are flaws.

How well do you know yourself? What are your strengths, & weaknesses?
Know myself quite well.
Strengths:
Steadfast
Curious
Jack-of-all-trades
"can do" attitude
Reliable problem-solver
Emotionally stable
etc.

Weaknesses:
withdrawn / "lone wolf"
Procrastination from boredom
...?

What are you trying to improve, at the moment?
Financial situation. Meeting more romantic partners. [albeit not very actively, on the latter]

What have you already accomplished?
Character development, keeping a myself sane. Overcoming personal issues.
I'm not the same person I was 5 years ago and proud over that.

What are your goals &/or dreams?
Being financially secure, my own small farmstead with a local pub nearby.
A pretty lady by my side at some point would be nice, to.
 

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My fellow INTJ's:


  • How do you see yourself? What's your self-concept, self realization, or self actualization?
  • How well do you know yourself? What are your strengths, & weaknesses?
  • What are you trying to improve, at the moment?
  • What have you already accomplished?
  • What are your goals &/or dreams?
I'm a private person. I'm a Renaissance man.
I know my strengths and weaknesses.
I'm focused on the future.
I've accomplished a lot, but
I have a ton of goals of mainly long-term, but some shorter-term, and quite a few "medium-term" goals.
 

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I'm a private person. I'm a Renaissance man.
I know my strengths and weaknesses.
I'm focused on the future.
I've accomplished a lot, but
I have a ton of goals of mainly long-term, but some shorter-term, and quite a few "medium-term" goals.
You really opened up and showed a lot of vulnerability there. Thanks for sharing.
 

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How do you see yourself? What's your self-concept, self realization, or self actualization?
P: Stable. Reliable. Strong. Protective of the weak. Barrier of Production. Determined.Fair. Motivator. Loud and Quiet.

N: Impatient. Self-absorbed. Overly-result reliant. Steadily always 'angry'. Easily Bored. Insecure in some areas. :1892:

How well do you know yourself? What are your strengths, & weaknesses?
I know all the ones I know; I don't know the ones I do not. I would say I know myself well - aside from "shadow" areas, that come out/are pointed out whenever they are. I love when my weaknesses are point out more than strengths; I want to reduce them immediately.

What are you trying to improve, at the moment?
Patience. :1892:

What have you already accomplished?
Job, travelled (although there is still room for more places), lot's of experiences, not dead yet .. etc.

What are your goals &/or dreams?
More money.
 

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1) How do you see yourself? What's your self-concept, self realization, or self actualization?

I see myself as someone who is hard working, strives for my goals, and I have my passion and I stubbornly pursue it despite numerous set backs and even a level of ignoring logic. On the other hand, I feel like I am too passive, too likely to back down, when I really don't want to. What is going on in my head isn't externalized as much as I wish it was.

2) How well do you know yourself? What are your strengths, & weaknesses?

I think I know myself pretty well and am painfully aware of my weaknesses. Strengths are my abilities that allow me to sort through information quickly, focus on tasks and knock things out far quicker than the average person, and my loyalty (to name a few).

Weaknesses are pretty typical of being an INTJ - I struggle to feel empathy, and dealing with feelers and managing their feelings wears me out. I have worked hard to get better about these things (or at least make it look like I am/care), but it IS draining.

3) What are you trying to improve, at the moment?

Finding that balance between being sympathic to feelers, and not being "insensitive" to their needs, but ALSO how to balance that with my needs without feeling like I'm just letting them walk all over me with their feelings they're so worried about. It's a fine line sometimes, but that's my biggest thing I'm trying to figure out right now.

4) What have you already accomplished?

I'm a million times better about not constantly getting frustrated with feelers and their overwhelming feelings. Over all, I think I'm way better about at least giving the appearance of empathy, but I'll admit, it's often an act - but it seems to work.

5) What are your goals &/or dreams?

Goals - well, my biggest goal right now is related to my racing - honestly, most other things in my life are being put towards that. I want to race the pro ranks, and that takes skill, time, and money - all of which I'm a bit lacking on, so I tend to build the rest of my life to helping me achieve that.

I also want to transition into a job that is more closely related to my education - but if the job cannot support the racing, then the transition isn't worth it for me right now.

Finally, travel. I want to visit a number of other countries on my list, and I'm seriously considering looking into retiring (if not moving before then) to another country. I have a couple/few possibilities on my list, but I want to spend time in each of them before I start to look into the gritty details of making that happen.
 

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How do you see yourself? What's your self-concept, self realization, or self actualization
oh god in a bucket. don't know. or if i do know, i'm not going into it here :wink: but at the moment, the fact is i don't. my focus hasn't been on my own navel lately.

How well do you know yourself?

mph. idk, that seems to have gotten less relevant after 40. i'm pretty familiar with myself, but it's been a long time since i asked that kind of thing. you live with your own self long enough, i guess maybe you stop feeling like you need an introduction/explanation of you to yourself? or something. so then you kind of lose track of the answers to questions like this.

What are your strengths, & weaknesses?
strengths seem to me to be a pretty relative thing. i'm tenacious and smart and resourceful and kind, but i'm not sure if i see those as 'virtues' or 'strengths'. weaknesses atm are tunnel vision, timidity and defensiveness. i think i would call those my failings as well, though the defensiveness is also just damned annoying.

What are you trying to improve, at the moment?
might report back about that if/when after i pick something and feel i've improved.


What have you already accomplished?

i'm still here and still me. and i think i can claim to be part of the reason my dad's still alive.

What are your goals &/or dreams?

i'm not in a dream mode right now. i'm going to get through these last years of my dad's life and do it as well as i can. and then after that i expect i'll take stock and form dreams or make plans.
 
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  • How do you see yourself? What's your self-concept, self realization, or self actualization?
  • How well do you know yourself? What are your strengths, & weaknesses?
  • What are you trying to improve, at the moment?
  • What have you already accomplished?
  • What are your goals &/or dreams?
Self Concept: I'd like to be a reasonable, rational, and respectably knowledgeable and successful person, who cares deeply about the relations I have with people I care about.


Strengths/Weaknesses:
Main strengths include having sound judgment; industriousness; ambitions; good with technical work (systems, tech, mechanics, theories, writing); clarity of reason; a rational sense of time, place, and purpose; adjusting well to difficult circumstances; knowing how to persuade people to do something (tactfully); being respectful of other people; being a sounding board for people who are frustrated; capability to work with complicated situations and learn interesting skills situationally.

Main weaknesses include thinking I've reached a point of skill or growth well before I really have; impatience/outrage/disgust at people who are disruptive, make repeated mistakes, or aren't conscientious; preemptively judging situations without letting them unfold naturally; telling myself I'm below an ideal and need to change; conveniently overlooking my own role in a shortcoming; mistaking criticism as rejection; avoiding disapproval by giving up what I want; overestimating my "lack of needs"; inability to control impulse wants when they're intense; not being as attentive to my body as I should be.


Improvement Focuses: Lately, I've been trying to catch myself immediately rushing to conclusions, and take information in rather than assess it right away - thereby letting in outside viewpoints I used to shut out. This has been surprisingly difficult to do over a long stretch. I've also tried to hold myself more accountable to goals and think about measurable ways to celebrate successes - rather than just mentally picturing the goal and hoping I end up in the right place and time for it to happen.


Accomplishments/Goals/Dreams: Biggest accomplishments have been my education, and getting a great job in a field that, for the most part, I enjoy. I also feel spiritually healthy, routinely assess my spiritual wellbeing, and have learned how to identify/manage issues early on before they become more serious. Financially, I'm doing a lot better than a lot of people my age, which is great.

Goal is to continue doing what I'm doing to keep a stable, comfortable life while also exposing myself to possible new interests and passions and letting them take root.

Dream is really just to find someone to fall in love with : ) And, to have done something for someone else that makes them notice that their life is noticeably better.
 

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Discussion Starter #11 (Edited)
Going back to my Achilles heel (romantic love), it's probably good to evaluate my strengths, & weaknesses, there too. Although, perceived, strengths, & weaknesses, can vary according to your partner. What's good for one person, may not work for another. Therefore, this is with a grain of salt, hopefully with someone, that can appreciate these traits.

Strengths
I'm a loyal individual, which means I would remain faithful to my partner. I'm considerate, caring, thoughtful, kind, & generous. My intelligence, logical thinking, & experience, can contribute greatly, to running a household, because I've done so, from an early age. I'm independent, which means I'm not clingy, or needy. I'm a low maintenance partner, with a high libido. Lastly, I'm willing to learn, & improve.

I will never ask something from my partner, that I'm not willing to give in return. I never want to be a burden to someone. I expect to be their partner, we are after all, on the same team, working side by side, to build our life together. I will always try my best to show my love in actions, & occasionally with words. Making an effort to show physical affection is easy when I love someone, & want to be around them.

Weaknesses
I'm not always in tune with people's feelings, so I may inadvertently hurt them. I can be in my own head sometimes, shutting others out. I need time alone, in addition, quiet time in the morning, is important, but that can be irritating to an SO. My reaction to problems is to fix them, & that's not always what a partner needs, they may just want a listening ear, hence I have to keep that in mind. I've been told I'm annoying, but with communication, I can keep that in check. I'm a bit of a neat freak, & germophobe, therefore patience is needed on my part, to not make their life miserable. I know I must have many more, but these are the ones coming to mind, from past experiences.

Also depending on my partner's personality, like if they are an extrovert, I have to be accommodating to that, & smile through it. Or if they are a feeler, try not to step on their toes, this is more of a challenge, but it can be done. Again communication is key, to overcome issues.
 

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How do you see yourself? What's your self-concept, self realization, or self actualization?

I see myself as both a planner and someone detailed oriented. I like precision and I'm somewhat of a perfectionist. One of the greatest satisfactions in my life are when I have my vision and I dive deep into the process to create and realize my vision. I'm also someone that's eager for knowledge and I constantly challenge mine and others' beliefs in order to arrive at the most correct truth.

How well do you know yourself? What are your strengths, & weaknesses?

I know myself well. My identity crises come less from wondering who I am and rather what I want to do in order to fully satisfy who I am and the things I enjoy doing.

My strengths are that I'm detail-oriented and have a vivid imagination and a search for the ultimate truth. I am a creative, in the sense that I like planning and having a vision and then making that a reality. My logic is sound and I'm constantly improving my thought processes and methods.

My weaknesses are that I sometimes am a perfectionist and can become obsessive if things are not exactly correct or don't line up with the things in my head. One of the most frustrating things for me is when I have this vision that I'm unable to execute because of my physical or resource limitations. I can also be seen as insensitive.

What are you trying to improve, at the moment?

I'm a musician and am trying to learn more about recording, production and post-production techniques.

What are your goals &/or dreams?

I want to become a professional composer and producer. I love the scientific/math side of music and I love working with technical details. I'm currently creating and mastering my own EP.

--

I've known I was an INTJ for ages but did question it for a time when I was a teenager because I wanted to go into an artistic/creative field for my career rather than STEM. Music is math and I love that aspect of it, rather than the self-expression aspect.

Nice to meet y'all by the way. This is my first post :)
 

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How do you see yourself? What's your self-concept, self realization, or self actualization? Lucky in business, constantly learning, in a state of redefinition.

How well do you know yourself? What are your strengths, & weaknesses? I think I know myself very well. I have always found people who lack intrapersonal skills a bit baffling. I hold the idea that I must be aware of my weaknesses so that I know my limitations.

What are you trying to improve, at the moment? Where I live physically. I just recently achieved some meaningful goals in work, health, and relationships so I'm on a sort of upswing when it comes to goals. I suppose I'm trying to expand my business (as ever), but that's a constant.

What have you already accomplished? So much more than I ever thought I would. But again, I cannot just say that it was all me. There was a significant amount of luck involved.

What are your goals &/or dreams? At this point in my life stage, my biggest dreams involve my children (aged 7 & 11) growing up in a safe environment where they have the opportunity to be successful and happy. I also want to see a platypus. I mean, in the wild.
 
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My fellow INTJ's:



  • How do you see yourself? What's your self-concept, self realization, or self actualization?
  • How well do you know yourself? What are your strengths, & weaknesses?
  • What are you trying to improve, at the moment?
  • What have you already accomplished?
  • What are your goals &/or dreams?
I see myself as a small speck in a vast world. Hence, I could be me and live life the way I want it to be cos there's little chance my natural self will disturb the equilibrium in the world. I prefer limiting my bubble to just me and the tasks that will take me to my envisioned future. Sometimes, I let few people inside the bubble. During normal days, it's just me and my tasks. That's one of the most peaceful states I could be in. The more people I have to consider, the more chaotic my mind is. I want everything in the right places. Recently, I've been noticing why I have really low energy. I think about things a lot. I have my favorite thought most of the time.

I know myself very little. Hence, I have to result to MBTI to put into words patterns i am not so sure about yet. I have to result to theories cos I dont have time and resources to observe and conclude on my own. I take what I see as the most sensible and test its flaws constantly.

I don't know much about myself. I'm good at observing others but myself. I seldom observe people anyway. My feelings are usually hard to understand. Psychology and NLP help me. Now I know why I cry, when I'm frustrated and why, and how to deal with my self during those times (sort of).

I have built some accomplishments already. They don't mean so much so I wont mention them here.

I still have loads to accomplish. A lifetime's worth of financial investments nd education. Im trying to learn how mortgages go so I can have multiple ones while I lease the properties and further my studies.

On the side, im trying to decide if my current relationship is worth the time and disappointments.
 

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I'm a private person. I'm a Renaissance man.
I know my strengths and weaknesses.
I'm focused on the future.
I've accomplished a lot, but
I have a ton of goals of mainly long-term, but some shorter-term, and quite a few "medium-term" goals.
You really opened up and showed a lot of vulnerability there. Thanks for sharing.

I am so entertained by this.

I mean it.
 

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My fellow INTJ's:


  • How do you see yourself? What's your self-concept, self realization, or self actualization?
  • How well do you know yourself? What are your strengths, & weaknesses?
  • What are you trying to improve, at the moment?
  • What have you already accomplished?
  • What are your goals &/or dreams?
In regards to positive traits, I'm decently diligent, very respectful to superiors and level-headed under pressure. I also do enjoy learning and being informed about the world.

Negative traits for me include being indecisive on more trivial matters, somewhat selfish (I like to get something back for everything I do) and not naturally friendly.

I'm trying to get myself a career since I had a few large failures in terms of my academic record. I accomplished little things, but its still very trivial when compared to my overall goal.

My current goal is to get a stable successful career and move on with my life. I frankly feel like I'm stuck in a limbo with a clock that's ticking down with each month.
 
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