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I want to know how you have wooed, are wooing, will woo, or would have wooed your ideal romantic partner or your real life romantic partner? Wooing and pursuing. How's it done, NT style? Walk me through your process (mental and concrete). I'm interested. Please do tell all.
 

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I don't woo. I'm terrible at it. I've tried, and it comes across as awkward and maybe a little stalker-ish (mainly because I pay attention, and know a lot more about people than they realize).

To woo an NT though, I think is to appeal especially to the T (I'm Te, so it makes sense that it's a good way to interact with others). I love intellectual conversation, even if it's not that smart (i.e. about movies or books), but done so in an intellectual way. I want to talk about the scientific possibility of living in space and the xeno-phobic reality of living in an interconnected galaxy and stuff like that.

I've had people try to be "romantic" with me before, like opening the car door, getting flowers, or saying I look pretty. Honestly, it makes me really uncomfortable because I don't know how to respond back. I think that when I'm presented with those stereotypical "romantic" things, I think my date expects me to reciprocate in the same, "romantic" way, i.e. being caring and nice and girly. I would much rather wear holey jeans and argue about an Ironman vs. Thor battle at McDonalds than a fancy dinner any day.

As I'm writing this, I think my thesis comes down to the fact that being genuine is sexy. To me, the way people act on dates isn't genuine. It's just a false front. I'd rather see my date as they are, not some stylized person that they're trying to be. The skeptic that I am, I rarely trust people on dates because I know they're trying to act better than they are. I don't care how nice/chivalrous/appropriate that you can try to act. I want to know how you really act, then we can actually get somewhere.

As a sidenote, for me personally, buying someone flowers is like throwing away cash. They're going to die anyways, so why not invest in something that's going to wilt, like a book or a day at mini-golf. I think things like that depend on the person, though. For instance, my mom loves getting flowers.
 

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I want to know how you have wooed, are wooing, will woo, or would have wooed your ideal romantic partner or your real life romantic partner? Wooing and pursuing. How's it done, NT style? Walk me through your process (mental and concrete). I'm interested. Please do tell all.
I don't.

Why is ''woo'ing'' necessary .. (?) It is an utter waste of time.

You either wanna fuck or no.

If the answer is 'yes' - that is when the ''romance'' kick(s) in.

If you asking how I caught the fish / nailed my (ex) + past affair(s) - I made her laugh for approximately for many hour(s) straight + discussed odd topics; not purposely, just merely talking in my normal state of mind; oddly she found it ''funny''; granted. She was VERY silly - completely not my type; perhaps that's what ''woo'd'' me in then, granted, she was sucking up my thought-ranting like a sponge + with ease; then counter attacking my point(s) with silliness / laughing but respectful + helpful ideas. This was very subconciously attractive for me; as very few listen to INTJ rant without criticizing + disgust / disinterest / boredom.

Afterward; the 2nd night was the same process. Estatic + emotionally clueless me, did not make a ''romantic'' move until a few month(s) down the line. That is when I really began to 'woo' purposefully, I thought it was utter nonsense + waste, she sucked it up like an appreciative sponge; she was not (NT / ST) so perhaps, that's why. A year later, we sealed it.

I suspect I was ''woo'ing'' by accident, as I had no real intention(s).

Years later, she confessed because of this eccentricity (via) my personality, she masturbated to me the 1st night meeting. At first, it was rather odd .. (?) Usually, with male specimen it is to appearance; flatterly, I thought perhaps I was just extremely good looking; no, it was ''humor'' she was masturbating to. I simply left, with ''cool.'' - She left and masturbated; odd but better than those cardboard / sandy - demi's with 0 sex drive, that's fer sure.

Still this was 'odd' + rather weird .. (?) As I was still ''random stranger'' status; some time later (i.e., battling her sexuality) - she then came out as being Demisexual - so that explain(s) that. I suppose ''masturbating'' to personalities is really thing - I cannot baffle it, however, I just thought she was hot shit & a tad stuck-up / silly.

So, there is that, I suppose.

I think I ''woo'' better w/out forced ''woo'ing''. If I attempted to actively 'woo' a non-partner, it would be completely embarrassing + overboard / pointless - I rather catch the fish, before I start discussing ways to cook it, 'thanks. It appear(s) ''being in my innate state'' (i.e., is more successful) - than the latter.
 

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I want to know how you have wooed, are wooing, will woo, or would have wooed your ideal romantic partner or your real life romantic partner? Wooing and pursuing. How's it done, NT style? Walk me through your process (mental and concrete). I'm interested. Please do tell all.
To be honest I'd like to coo with my baby tonight
And pitch the woo with my baby tonight
But I ain't up to my baby tonight
Cause it's tooooo darn hot
It's TOO darn hot
IT'S TOO DARN HOT
 

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I won over my INTP by fixing things that were annoying to him, providing him with sustenance, asking for his help and opinions on things (to show that I valued his input), and talking about random intellectual/theoretical crap with him (which meant he actually responded). I'd say that's probably a pretty typical INTJ woo.
 

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How do I do it? I become a puppy that wants to learn about you and asks a ton of questions.

It doesn't always work, it often just creeps people out u_u.
xD I become overly obsessive at times....and scare then away
oops
 
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I don't. I can't flirt worth shit. :laughing:
 
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Heh I don't woo. I'm terrible at it. I lured my man in by not being super emotional, plus not expecting him to read my mind.

My husband makes more attempts to be romantic than I do.
 
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I like to feign disinterest so that I can be the runner, then for some reason I become disinterested, maybe because I'm acting like it I don't know.

Either way, I'll employ tact, there is nothing worse than being on the losing end of a chase for a significant other that you genuinely love, it's absolutely caustic, damaging in every way.
 

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Discussion Starter #19
I won over my INTP by fixing things that were annoying to him, providing him with sustenance, asking for his help and opinions on things (to show that I valued his input), and talking about random intellectual/theoretical crap with him (which meant he actually responded). I'd say that's probably a pretty typical INTJ woo.
Thanks for sharing! I have read elsewhere that INTJs show their love by innovating ways to make their Love Interest's life easier or simpler.
 
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