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Discussion Starter #1
Hey, I am curious as to what other ENFPS or NFs do when they feel they are stuck in a rut? Life has been pretty mundane lately because most of what I do involves going to school, then work, then maybe hanging out with my boyfriend or a friend. I really value social time and meeting new people but I am not really able to do that, and my school subjects are all things I do not like (math, physics, and economics). Of course, I also want to try and just push through it, but it is really hard to find the motivation because it all feels so boring and as I said, mundane. How can I find things to dream about again? Or, better yet, how can I find ways to enjoy the mundane aspects of life in order to do well on my school work and stay in the moment?
 

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Re: Motivation.

Employ Mel Robbins' five second rule. (Look her up on YouTube.)

Regarding boredom: find ways to broaden your mind in your off hours. Read new books. Intellectual books. Seek out new entertainment and music. Learn something new. Reward yourself for doing the boring things, with things you love. :)
 

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When I was in college and studying a science, and after spending time in chemistry study hall, for instance (by the way, study groups were a great way for me to meet people but get my work done) then I'd run off over to our International Cinema that amazingly played movies almost all day long with almost NOBDOY watching them and I'd just slip in at any given time. If people took the International Cinema class then I guess it was mandatory to watch like 5 of them in a semester. The teacher who put it together was absolutely passionate about International Films. I never took the class. I can list all of the movies I learned to love doing that. It was fun for me to describe, sorry for the ramble. But also after studying chemistry for a while I'd slip off to the library and find an author that only I loved and lay down on the floor in the library where nobody was and just read on for forever.
Something that kicked off after I left, but that I wish I was doing now is putting together an International Movie and Food night.
So... group of people who you think are cool. Dress up if you like. Have "Japanese" night. Watch Rashoman and eat Japanese food.
Or watch Emelie or whatever and have French.... so fun!
What if you like going dancing? Do they have swing clubs? What are the music majors up to? Are they doing a opera theater dinner? I had a roommate majoring in drama... they had student plays going on all the day during the day for free most of the semester.
Sometimes if I was bored I'd see someone I knew and ask them what class they were going to and if it sounded cool to me, I'd ask if I could just come to class with them that day. i did that a lot. I got to listen to a guy lecture on literature that I absolutely loved. Brave, but if the teachers noticed and asked me why I was there, they usually seeemed flattered when I just said, "I just wanted to learn about such and such. Is it okay?". Oh, usually the art rooms are open to anyone. And often you can use the pottery wheels all you like.
Colleges/Universities can be a wonderland!
 

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Discussion Starter #4
Re: Motivation.

Employ Mel Robbins' five second rule. (Look her up on YouTube.)

Regarding boredom: find ways to broaden your mind in your off hours. Read new books. Intellectual books. Seek out new entertainment and music. Learn something new. Reward yourself for doing the boring things, with things you love. :)
thank you! I have never heard of Mel Robbins, thanks for the suggestion. Also, the last piece of advice is great as well.
T
 

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Discussion Starter #5
When I was in college and studying a science, and after spending time in chemistry study hall, for instance (by the way, study groups were a great way for me to meet people but get my work done) then I'd run off over to our International Cinema that amazingly played movies almost all day long with almost NOBDOY watching them and I'd just slip in at any given time. If people took the International Cinema class then I guess it was mandatory to watch like 5 of them in a semester. The teacher who put it together was absolutely passionate about International Films. I never took the class. I can list all of the movies I learned to love doing that. It was fun for me to describe, sorry for the ramble. But also after studying chemistry for a while I'd slip off to the library and find an author that only I loved and lay down on the floor in the library where nobody was and just read on for forever.
Something that kicked off after I left, but that I wish I was doing now is putting together an International Movie and Food night.
So... group of people who you think are cool. Dress up if you like. Have "Japanese" night. Watch Rashoman and eat Japanese food.
Or watch Emelie or whatever and have French.... so fun!
What if you like going dancing? Do they have swing clubs? What are the music majors up to? Are they doing a opera theater dinner? I had a roommate majoring in drama... they had student plays going on all the day during the day for free most of the semester.
Sometimes if I was bored I'd see someone I knew and ask them what class they were going to and if it sounded cool to me, I'd ask if I could just come to class with them that day. i did that a lot. I got to listen to a guy lecture on literature that I absolutely loved. Brave, but if the teachers noticed and asked me why I was there, they usually seeemed flattered when I just said, "I just wanted to learn about such and such. Is it okay?". Oh, usually the art rooms are open to anyone. And often you can use the pottery wheels all you like.
Colleges/Universities can be a wonderland!
Aw I love this post !! And don't apologize for your excitement, I think it's great :) Sadly I am just entering University next fall, I am currently a senior in high school, but this gave me some hope for the future. Thank you!!
 

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Always have an open mind and always challenge/learn something. I sometimes think when we get older there is a stigma that we can't learn other things in life (an intrument, paint, cook, etc). I know you can do it you smart noodle c:
 

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You're at school, you don't have the option to choose/design your own path yet. If you are in a rut at that age, there is little you can do about it without opportunity/luck. You need to ride it out and do your best to anticipate what your next progression will be, so that the same won't happen that time..

Try to learn from why you are in a rut at the moment, so that when you actually have the freedom of choice, you will have learnt the lessons to make the appropriate decisions for yourself.
 

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@m0ncheri
Sorry, I realised how blunt that sounded lol. I experienced ruts during school, and what did help me was when I was able to discover new social groups or new activities, but like I said those do depend a bit on luck and circumstance. Later on you'll have much more scope- I mean you'll literally have the whole world of options.

What I meant to say was that planning for the future by using the present will benefit both your perspective for now, and also benefit your future. There's no greater feeling than visualising a future, and then later living that visualisation out all the while thinking "I'm DOING IT! I'm actually doing that thing that I visualised". It just requires patience and composure in the meantime.
 

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Discussion Starter #9
@m0ncheri
Sorry, I realised how blunt that sounded lol. I experienced ruts during school, and what did help me was when I was able to discover new social groups or new activities, but like I said those do depend a bit on luck and circumstance. Later on you'll have much more scope- I mean you'll literally have the whole world of options.

What I meant to say was that planning for the future by using the present will benefit both your perspective for now, and also benefit your future. There's no greater feeling than visualising a future, and then later living that visualisation out all the while thinking "I'm DOING IT! I'm actually doing that thing that I visualised". It just requires patience and composure in the meantime.
Thank you!! Don't worry, you didn't sound blunt at all. I appreciate the advice!
 
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