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Discussion Starter #1 (Edited)
I'm a female isfj and Im having trouble understanding the intentions of my isfp guy friend. He's really genuine and artistic and something about him drew me in pretty quickly. To be clear, I've had a crush on this guy for about four years but being shy and socially awkward around new people I never really was able to get super close to him until recently. (To provide some context we used to live next door to eachother but we were both quiet and only really had conversations about music and his love for dance from time to time and sometimes he would do odd things like poke me, or touch my foot, or push my chair while looking at me (in a nonchalant joking kind of way but it was odd because, again, we didn't talk very often. Other people around us would be talking and he'd just start doing these things. I would usually just ignore it or go somewhere else, but he would go out of his way to kind of lurk around if that makes sense haha) then I moved and thought we wouldn't contact eachother again. I had always been too nervous to ask for his number and he didn't really use social media)
Anyways, a couple weeks after quarantine started his family wanted to video call ours. I thought I had gotten over him since we hadn't seen each other since November but I was clearly wrong lol. He had gotten instagram and we ended up exchanging usernames and all that jazz. And a couple of days later I dm-ed him to ask a question and we ended up having a short conversation. A couple of days later I messaged him to see if he wanted to join a game me and some friends were playing and he did. That's all cool and normal, right?
But then I asked about a song he had recommended and he proceeded to make me a playlist with over 100+ songs to which my friends all told me something must be up since that's a lot of effort to go for someone. But being my isfj self, I HATE to assume other people's intentions, so I wrote it off as him being a super nice person.
Then somehow we started exchanging a couple memes a day with some general conversation. Again, normal friendship stuff but now it's been almost 2 months and he's messaged me every single day. I thought we would talk less once he went back to work but nope. I can feel he's starting to get comfortable because it's less memes and more sharing little things like what he's doing at the moment or work or the random stuff he's buying on Amazon (I don't know either lol). But I'm not sure if this is platonic or something else. Also, he initiates 90% of our conversations.

I'm trying to tell this as un-biased as possible so I can get genuine opinions. He's a really likeable person in general and pretty talkative in person now (we've talked twice via video call with another mutual friend) so I feel like it could be either way. As isfps do you think he's just being a nice person, or should I be reading more into this much interaction?

Thank you in advance~

UPDATED

So earlier both me and said friend decided to get together via video call with some friends and the whole time I was trying to figure out how to have an actual discussion and confront him on what's been going on. So after the call ends I send him a message that was related to what we had been talking about and it somehow got on the topic of leading people on especially via texting often/everyday. I decided to be straightforward and let him know that when a man goes of out of his way to text a woman every day it could be perceived as interest in a relationship. So semi long story short I ended up preparing myself for a rejection and just confessing my feelings. Let me tell you I was not expecting the response he gave. Turns out he had had feelings for me for some time but didn't wanna risk ruining the friendship if it wasn't mutual. We're in the process of figuring things out but all in all, life is good. :)

Thanks everyone who took the time to give me advice!! :)
 

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Hey,

this new Forum Style is somehow irritating, so that is perhaps the Reason why we answer more slowly than normal :) I had to force myself now.

So, I don´t know how much Experiences you have yourself regarding Love and Relationships. If this is new for both of you two, then isn´t it an innocent and pure Form of Flirting with each other?
He was perhaps testing his Boundaries first, but unsure how far it should/could go and was cautious/anxious about it. Some People start so fast that it can be quite the Pressure for their Friends and Classmates, etc. Taking Time for checking out each other is sometimes better than diving in without a second Look/Thought.

Now, you have a good Connection, and the Interest on both Sides seems to be clear, but I am not sure how you two handle the "Social Distancing" Stuff. Could you just ask him to watch a Movie together at Home? Or to meet up and listen to Music together, whatever you two like the most.

I am not sure of him being the One who is asking you first. If it is difficult for you two, you will have to use the right fateful Moment to go a Step further.

Good Luck!
 

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Discussion Starter #3
Hey,

this new Forum Style is somehow irritating, so that is perhaps the Reason why we answer more slowly than normal :) I had to force myself now.

So, I don´t know how much Experiences you have yourself regarding Love and Relationships. If this is new for both of you two, then isn´t it an innocent and pure Form of Flirting with each other?
He was perhaps testing his Boundaries first, but unsure how far it should/could go and was cautious/anxious about it. Some People start so fast that it can be quite the Pressure for their Friends and Classmates, etc. Taking Time for checking out each other is sometimes better than diving in without a second Look/Thought.

Now, you have a good Connection, and the Interest on both Sides seems to be clear, but I am not sure how you two handle the "Social Distancing" Stuff. Could you just ask him to watch a Movie together at Home? Or to meet up and listen to Music together, whatever you two like the most.

I am not sure of him being the One who is asking you first. If it is difficult for you two, you will have to use the right fateful Moment to go a Step further.

Good Luck!
Thank you so much for responding! I'm new to this site, so I'm just glad someone would take the time out to help me. :)
I'm not sure about him, but I've always kept away from casual dating as I really only want to enter into a relationship that has potential to last. I do feel like you could be right about his trying to test boundaries. He kind of gives off that vibe sometimes.
It's funny you mention watching a movie because since social distancing measures started we've made a list of movies that we watch apart and then talk about. I can see that he's gotten to be very comfortable, but like you said I might have to be the one to say something first as we both seem to be okay not rushing anything.

Thanks again~!
 

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Discussion Starter #5
I think it's more important to be clear about your intentions first. Do you want to be friends with him or do you want to date him?
Good point. I already consider us good friends but I would definitely like to date him if the opportunity presented itself.
 

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Good point. I already consider us good friends but I would definitely like to date him if the opportunity presented itself.
Then I honestly think that guessing around won't bring you far. He didn't say or do anything obvious. Some people just love to make playlists for everyone, some love to make playlists for people they want to date. I would just directly ask him if he wants to go out on a date with you. Actually calling it a date. That will most probably answer your questions. :)
 

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Discussion Starter #7
Then I honestly think that guessing around won't bring you far. He didn't say or do anything obvious. Some people just love to make playlists for everyone, some love to make playlists for people they want to date. I would just directly ask him if he wants to go out on a date with you. Actually calling it a date. That will most probably answer your questions. :)
Thank you!! That's what I thought but since my friends and family are so insistent on how he feels, I wanted to get some unbiased opinions before I do anything. Maybe I'll take your suggestion after this whole quarantine ends.😊
 

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I don't force myself to talk to someone every day whom I'm only trying to be nice to. Not saying he likes you necessarily but there's definitely something up; he seems to hold you in pretty high regard.

Like others have said, I'd just ask him out.
 

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Discussion Starter #9
I don't force myself to talk to someone every day whom I'm only trying to be nice to. Not saying he likes you necessarily but there's definitely something up; he seems to hold you in pretty high regard.

Like others have said, I'd just ask him out.
Yeah, you're right. Turns out he did :)
thank you for your advice!
 

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Okay, I'm really glad that you included that update about confessing and how that went. I'm really happy for you. I was definitely shipping you guys hard by the end of the pre-update post. =)
 

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Discussion Starter #11
Okay, I'm really glad that you included that update about confessing and how that went. I'm really happy for you. I was definitely shipping you guys hard by the end of the pre-update post. =)
Haha I'm glad you enjoyed the roller coaster that was this entire friendship with this man because I was STRESSED and confused😂. Thanks for being so kind to respond!
 
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