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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I've known this girl for years now, and I don't even really remember how we started talking, we've just always made an effort to say hi to each other and she's always just been so nice to me. I think cause I've always been a small guy, the 'cute'/slight shyness made her want to kind of 'look after me' in a way. She has that typical ENFJ thing of being so nice at almost all times, always flattering me and telling me how funny and cute I am, but she's like this with everyone. She wants them to be happy. Hell, she even just recently came out of a long term relationship. I definitely don't think she sees me in the way I hope she would. I suppose it's more just the way you'd see a puppy. Physically she's a knock out, and sometimes I find myself simultaneously intimidated and intrigued over how attractive and forward she can be with her feelings. But she also has a slightly socially awkward streak, which means I can relate to her on so many levels.

I suppose I've been harbouring a subdued crush on her for years now. We talked a lot about 2 years ago, when I definitely think I had feelings for her. Then for a while we didn't talk as much, we just sort of drifted I suppose, and although I've thought of her as probably the closest I am with a girl, the feelings and communication faded. We'd say hi in the hall and have a quick chat, but nothing like before. But the last week or so it's kind of reignited. Even though she had just came out of a long term relationship, we've been texting a lot. I thought it might be awkward between us talking again for some reason, but I spent the full day with her and a mutual friend the other day, and while they laughed with each other about how awkward it was between them two for some reason, she made an effort to tell me she doesn't feel awkward around me at all. I basically laughed the full time I was around her, and she was the same. It sounds cheesy as fuck, but she just makes me happy when I'm around her. The feelings have resurfaced I think.

But I know she doesn't see me like that. It's just her ENFJ care bear instincts, always has been, always will be. Obviously as an INFP it's unlikely I'll ever make a move, but it pains me that I'm in this position a bit. I don't know if I'll ever tell her, she just doesn't see me that way at all and I know it deep down. I just hate that I'm developing feelings for her again when I know in advance it just won't work. I wish I didn't think about things like this so god damn much and just acted on my feelings for once. But I want some advice from you ENFJs who might understand her more. From how she acts, does it sound like she's remotely interested in me, or is she just being nice?
 

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You are an idiot.
Make a move.
Seriously.

As an ENFJ if there is anyone I "care about" it's because I think of them as a possibility. Not all ENFJ's are the same but don't be an idiot and wait until there isn't a chance. Tell her how you feel, and ask if you can talk about it. IT doesn't have to be weird so long as you're both mature adults.

Just do it.

And if you don't want to then give me her number and I'll do it for you.
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
You are an idiot.
Make a move.
Seriously.

As an ENFJ if there is anyone I "care about" it's because I think of them as a possibility. Not all ENFJ's are the same but don't be an idiot and wait until there isn't a chance. Tell her how you feel, and ask if you can talk about it. IT doesn't have to be weird so long as you're both mature adults.

Just do it.

And if you don't want to then give me her number and I'll do it for you.
Hahahaha yeah I suppose I am an idiot. There's just so much in the way that kind of is in the way of me getting with her. She just broke up with her boyfriend a few weeks ago, but their on/off relationship makes me want to wait a little longer and see if her feelings for him are gone. There's also the fact that I'm pretty sure there will be an army of guys, each one closer to her and more physically attractive, that she's sure to go for over me. She's never said or done anything that makes me think she sees me in anyway other than a platonic way, or maybe she has and I'm just oblivious. But I doubt she sees me in this way, and it would just be a wasted attempt in the end.
 
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