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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
(i'm just beginning to look into mb so please excuse my general ignorance)

So I test as an intj consistently. I relate to being an intj. My mother is convinced i'm an intj. I don't see myself as any other type but there's a big part of me that i feel is very contradictory to the intj and that that i'm highly sensitive to the emotions of people around me. I'm constantly studying people and I'm hyper aware of things like body language, tone of voice, anything that could reflect a negative change in mood. And if I feel there was even the slightest change I want to know why and if i can't figure out why i become extremely paranoid that i inadvertently caused someone to feel sad or mad or annoyed and that gives me a lot of anxiety.

When I was initially researching the intj it seems like they're sometimes not aware of social queues because they're not concerned with that aspect of interaction with people. If that true that's the opposite if me.

I have concocted a theory about all this that makes sense in my mind, but my mind is not one with a lot of knowledge on this topic so i would really appreciate input on this. I was diagnosed with Aspergers and social anxiety which both make complete sense in regards to my earlier childhood and my life now accept for the fact that kids with Aspergers are known to not understand social queues, and I know I'm repeating myself, but that is the complete opposite of me. So my theory is this-

I'm not trying to brag when I say I'm smart, and i don't mean smart in an intellectual way. It's just that being aware of things and understanding things or seeking to understand things has always been an inherent part of my personality since i was a baby. Literally a baby. And although I'm very aware of the way social customs work, they are still baffling to me in a way ('Perhaps the most fundamental problem, however, is that INTJs really want people to make sense' has always really resonated with me), and i have to make a conscious effort to fit in with people in an everyday setting. So what i think is that since I'm very aware and adaptive, i learned from a very young age to monitor myself and others so that i could fit in. And so I overcompensate for what i don't naturally have by training myself to be this person that i am. The person who had a serious panic attack because someone in a grocery store looked at me in a weird way and said 'wow' in a condescending tone because she overheard me say something sarcastic to my mom. I could't stand the fact that she had this impression of me she based of something i doubt she understood. I'm rambling and getting off point, as expected.

So this has been an awful attempt at trying to explain what i need help with, but basically i understand that it doesn't make sense for me to be a mix of intj and infj. And since being aware of feelings is not an intj but infj thing, I really have no idea how to sort this out.

I was introduced to mb a couple of weeks ago so I'm sorry my understanding is minimal, but i would really appreciate any insight you could offer.
 

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i'm highly sensitive to the emotions of people around me. I'm constantly studying people and I'm hyper aware of things like body language, tone of voice, anything that could reflect a negative change in mood. And if I feel there was even the slightest change I want to know why and if i can't figure out why i become extremely paranoid that i inadvertently caused someone to feel sad or mad or annoyed and that gives me a lot of anxiety.
This seems very familiar as it's Ne/Ti at work. I think it gets so stressful because we don't sense these things subconsciously but directly search for the signals you mentioned, enabling us to notice small changes and overthink them.

I'm not a psychologist but you seem indecisive and paranoid enough to be an INTP. What was the percentage on your J if you remember?
 

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indecisive and paranoid enough to be an INTP.
LOL

I didnt read the entire thing but you sound F not NT. Because:
begging you to help
excuse my general ignorance
i feel is very contradictory
highly sensitive to the emotions
extremely paranoid that i inadvertently caused someone to feel sad
my mind is not one with a lot of knowledge
i don't mean smart in an intellectual way
Anyhow, Ill make a more serious post in acouple minutes
 

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That's not an INTJ thing? I call myself an "emotional tampon" sometimes b/c it's as if I absorb other people's emotions. :laughing: Thought it had to do with Ni/Fi. It's basically a visceral reaction that I'm compelled to "figure out." I am def. not F-dominant though. I get very uncomfortable when this happens (hypersensitivity, internalizing other people's emotional states just because I'm in close proximity to them.) -- the terminology developed as kind of dark humor to help me cope. The discomfort seems more characteristic of T's. My automatic reaction is either "make it go away" or "how do I get out of here?" I would think an F would be more comfortable with it and actually try to use it in a social interaction to get closer to people, help them out, ask what's wrong or something... whereas it mostly just freaks me out and I tend to start intellectualizing to "fix" it. But what do I know. haha

I guess it's a question of whether or not you're comfortable with it. As I said with F types I get the sense this is integral to their sense of self and it's automatic for them to use it constructively (like for empathy or something.)
 

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so, you havent gives us much to work on but Ill try my best.

So I test as an intj consistently. I relate to being an intj. My mother is convinced i'm an intj.
You are probably not an INTJ.
i'm highly sensitive to the emotions of people around me.
F

I'm constantly studying people and I'm hyper aware of things like body language, tone of voice, anything that could reflect a negative change in mood.
SF?

i become extremely paranoid that i inadvertently caused someone to feel sad or mad or annoyed and that gives me a lot of anxiety.
F

When I was initially researching the intj it seems like they're sometimes not aware of social queues because they're not concerned? with that aspect of interaction with people. If that true that's the opposite if me.
Sometimes? yeah sure :D Anyhow, returning to being serious, you probably arent an INTJ

I have concocted a theory about all this that makes sense in my mind
N, edit: well it wasnt N, you didnt really have a theory there, that was just a jumble of words.

I was diagnosed with Aspergers and social anxiety which both make complete sense in regards to my earlier childhood and my life now accept for the fact that kids with Aspergers are known to not understand social queues, and I know I'm repeating myself, but that is the complete opposite of me.
That means you dont have aspergers... Or you assume you can understand social situations.

I'm not trying to brag when I say I'm smart, and i don't mean smart in an intellectual way.
Not NT

It's just that being aware of things and understanding things or seeking to understand things has always been an inherent part of my personality since i was a baby.
That means you arent an ESFJ or ISFJ

Perhaps the most fundamental problem, however, is that INTJs really want people to make sense' has always really resonated with me
I dont think that the "make sense" is the same sense you understand

and i have to make a conscious effort to fit in with people in an everyday setting.
That might be aspergers, not MBTI.

So what i think is that since I'm very aware and adaptive
SP

I could't stand the fact that she had this impression of me she based of something i doubt she understood. I'm rambling and getting off point, as expected.
actually that was more on point than the rest of it.


Based on this you are not E. So we can rule out 8 personalities.
Not SJ, thats also for sure. so 6 personalities left.
You arent NT, so 4 left.
ISFP, ISTP, INFJ,INFP.
Id say you are either ISFP or INFJ.

Ok well.. here is what you need to do,
1) Go into the Whats my type subforum.whats my personality type
2) Use this questionnaire questionnaire
3) Make a new thread with your answers over there
4) Mention me in that thread somewhere (or PM me but I guess you cant since you dont have enough posts..)
Ill read that and try to type you again, hopefully in a better way.
 

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well, being aware of people's emotions doesn't prevent you to be Intj. i consider myself an intj, my brain works like an intj and all the people around me admit that. and one of my favorite things to do is sitting alone in a public place and just look at people. it's a great pleasure to study their acts, to analyse their behavior, to know their nature. we are scientists, aren't we?
there is something else. we can't put intelligence and personality simply together. Intjs are typically considered to be smart, and it doesn't mean other personalities are not.
and the most important thing is that we can't put 6 billion people into only 16 personality types. most of us change through different personalities of these 16 during different situations.Human behavior is much more complex than this simple model of 16 personalities. and i have seen lots of people with different MBTI personalities.
besides, from your post, i think you would be an NF not an NT. but no one knows better than you.
 

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besides, from your post, i think you would be an NF not an NT. but no one knows better than you.
Except if they are NF, then you know better than them.
 

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Discussion Starter · #8 ·
I was a very high j. In normal circumstances I'm not indecisive at all, and I think a big reason I'm so frustrated with this is I want to have my type locked down. I want to know for sure what I am.
 

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Discussion Starter · #9 ·
I get very uncomfortable when this happens (hypersensitivity, internalizing other people's emotional states just because I'm in close proximity to them.) -- the terminology developed as kind of dark humor to help me cope.
yeah that's very much me

My automatic reaction is either "make it go away" or "how do I get out of here?" I would think an F would be more comfortable with it and actually try to use it in a social interaction to get closer to people, help them out, ask what's wrong or something... whereas it mostly just freaks me out and I tend to start intellectualizing to "fix" it.
the whole thing makes me very uncomfortable and my first reaction too is to try to fix it. I can't stand to be around people who have strong negative emotions and I do have to try to intellectualize and analyze so I can distance myself from them
 
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