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Your situation/story sounds remarkably similar to my own. It's almost a bit eerie. lol Anyway, some of the stuff about morality could be indicative of Fe, especially the part about protecting others. The motive is subjective, but the focus is still external. Se could account for the showmanship, joke cracking, and especially the thrill seeking and adrenaline part. Wanting all the facts before a decision might, just maybe, lean more towards indicating, that you lead with a perceiving function. That's probably easier to tell based by how easily you're willing to change your point of view. Those who lead with a judging function, usually persist with their judgments even in spite of the intake of new evidence. A lot of the intellectual stuff probably just comes from being intelligent, but might have something to do with Ti. Ti wants to understand the nature of...everything. Most people don't understand Se well (myself included), as they see it only in its hedonistic outlandishness or paired with Fi, in ESFPs. However, the vast majority of the STP's here and on other typing forums are at the very least a tad bit intellectual, some are very intellectual. As for myself, my problems with "run away" bouts of Se, leading to periods of my life where I'm incredibly hedonistic, have lead me to lean towards xSTP myself. I disclose that, because, like yourself, I'm an atheist, an existential nihilist, I've questioned the meaning and purpose of life, read Nietzche, took a great intellectual curiosity in science, philosophy, theology, and ethics. I even usually test out as an N, and other people have even tested me as an N, but I think it's the Ti or my people reading skills.
 

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There's some good stuff about Se here, including stuff about using it in a hedonistic way, which I've had problems with as far back as I can remember, way back into my childhood. There's a thread about it in the SP section. Apparently, Se doesn't have to be the dominant function for it to occur, but it does seem to be a problem unique to SP's, meaning auxiliary Se, at the least. If it's not a problem for you, that's of no help. So, other things then...

The strong need for freedom from control or from being told what to do seems a very common ISTP trait. However, they have no need/desire to command or control others, whereas ESTP's are actually directive and want to lead, like many J's. As for other ways to separate Se from Ne as a process, I think everything is very present motivated and motivated by sensory cues with Se. I can see several possibilities in an instant, and automatically, but it's sparked off by environmental sensory cues. It still probably involves some Ni. Se also usually is goal or end oriented. It's also big on impressions, it would seem, attention gathering, showmanship, etc. Everything serves a purpose. For example, the point of my own academic skills was always to make an impression. I'm a very competitive person, and I was a very competitive child. I won every spelling bee, won state essay contests, etc. I had to be the best, the brightest, and most successful, because it was how I made my mark.

Ne with Ti will consider "random" things, as the considering is more of an end in itself. For example, there are some threads here started by NTP's, that are posing hypothetical situations, that have no relevance in current reality, and may never have relevance in any reality. Intellectualism can be an end in itself, I think. For example, I have an INTP buddy, that got his doctorates in philosophy, only to go into a non-related field. I wouldn't invest that many years in school or all that money, unless I planned on being a philosophy professor or writing philosophy books.
 
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