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INTJ 4w3 sp/sx
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Discussion Starter #1
I don't like sex or being seduced by some girls, they told me I had a cute and sweet face but I don't like my appearance and I don't like my body, especially the fact that I don't like having a body, I have always had fantasies of doing invasive skull surgeries and inserting microchips inside my body and brain and of completely sterilizing myself almost to become a sort of perfect and divine cyborg, for me love and sex are things stupid and nonsense, I just want to become a champion of chess and other PC strategy games, I feel like having no past I could very well destroy my own face and body and sacrifice all of myself to achieve my goals, not m it matters nothing about my family or living in general let alone carefree. I just feel that I would be able to love myself, I don't care about other people's lives, I just want to be more intelligent, assertive, destructive, competitive and have a perfect memory and creativity, literally become a God and unbeatable in anything intellectual and humiliate my adversaries. Unfortunately, however, I find myself having a limited mind and body and having to be forced to ingest organic shit also called food.
 

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Did you know that if you program yourself correctly, you can have all of the above AND great sexual pleasure?
 

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ENTJ 7w8 sx/so
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What's wrong with finding someone you can live with and living a private life together? That sounds like a fine goal to me to want to have.
 

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INTJ 4w3 sp/sx
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Discussion Starter #5
What's wrong with finding someone you can live with and living a private life together? That sounds like a fine goal to me to want to have.
This becouse first u are an extrovert and like controlling others, for me every moment of my life is a good occasion for become paranoid and suspect of everyone, this is why i refuse to have girlfriend and doubt about females say me im actractive while im not.
 

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ENTJ 7w8 sx/so
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This becouse first u are an extrovert and like controlling others, for me every moment of my life is a good occasion for become paranoid and suspect of everyone, this is why i refuse to have girlfriend and doubt about females say me im actractive while im not.
Maybe Warp10 is right and you simply need to reprogram yourself. Also, it also wouldn't hurt to get yourself away from toxic places and situations as that hurts nearly everyone's self-esteem.
 

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Just INTJ things.
 

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INTP-A
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Sounds like you're terrified of losing control, which of course is related to non-logical human experiences and emotions (sex and love are the greatest examples).
You can't rationalize feelings → you feel like you're losing control → your mind blocks it → you feel frustrated → you conclude: you know what? It doesn't make sense at all, b̶u̶t̶ ̶w̶h̶y̶ → anger increases
I believe the anger you feel (translated in a destructive ambition, as you say) could tell you about a frustration borned in constant failed connections with people. It's not really wrong to not feel sexual desire, but feel disgusted by it has an underlying issue.
As you say, only then, with that cyborg transformation, you will be able to love yourself, another issue. I can tell you're in the right track, though, you pretty much know what you want and, congrats, you are aware of your own limitations, so what's stopping you?
Play chess and work on your memory and strategy game to almost perfection. If the feeling of slavery to your body is unbearable, there are plenty of ways to play with it: exercise (I'm sure bodybuilders have a similar experience in this regard), meditation and fasting, etc. And, of course, get a therapist (I'm not saying it as a personal thing, EVERYONE needs one). You seem pretty miserable right now, you just need to leave your social issues aside and work on yourself. Again, that hate and desperation comes from frustration, don't ignore it.
Years ago I would have completely related to you. I still don't have faith in people, but I don't hate them, neither I want to crush them. I know those issues are on me and, to be honest, it doesn't matter.
 

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